Well we finally did it and god helps us. 09-10-09
Everyone tells us we are doing a great thing and some will go on and say we are blessed. I hope so. It’s one thing to think about the reality of in the distant future of taking the care and feeding of two human lives’s and the reality of really doing it. We are at the point now of being the directors, of being in the driver’s seat, whatever expression you want to attach to it. We hold the fate of these two young girls in our hands. We have sat on the side lines critiquing the way other people have raised their kids and constantly asked the question why they did that, or what’s wrong with them for allowing that to happen. Well I have the feeling we are going to get the answer to those questions real soon.
The day started out like any other day in the last few, I woke up in Russia and it was real early in the morning. I was not sleepy and it felt like I was never going to get back to sleep. I let my mind wander and at first it traveled toward my job and I felt that it was a mistake to think about something that was out of your control and to just hope for the best and that things were working out for the best. I then wandered over to thoughts about the days coming events and began composing my speech for the court. I said a lot of really good things in it and promised myself that I would remember them all when I woke up. Which I didn’t, all I remembered was that I had some really good ideas and if I could only remember.
I woke up late in the morning, I think it was now 5:30, and felt I had slept all I could and began to write what happened the previous day. I began to experience a caffeine headache and knew the only way to get rid of it was to go out and get caffeine. Teri said it was foolish to go out into a country where you could not read the language much less speak it, had no phone, not idea what the address was and even if you did you could not pronounce it. So with all that encouragement what else could a man do but deify his wife and go out anyway.
My wife has asked me how I manage to make it through the day without her and have been told that is a major topic of conversation among women.
I tell my wife I’m going to go out the door to the street and make a left turn and head toward in that direction. She replies that every time we go out we head right. I was very tempted to go to the left but I didn’t want her to be able to say I told you so when she came to get me from the police. I went down the stairs to the road made a right, make a second and was suddenly in the middle of morning rush hour. It was so different from anything I’d ever known. It was people gathering at bus stops, walking here and there. Going into business to get a morning cup of coffee, or as in my case a liter bottle of Pepsi. I find a shop that is open, I go in and try the door to the Pepsi cooler and it won’t open. I try the other side and it doesn’t either. So I leave, victory stalled. I’m walking back without my trophy thinking I was defeated by a stuck door when I get the bright idea to try another street. About half way down I find a store that stocks Pepsi free (again no diet Pepsi) the girl behind the country says something and I reply like I know what’s up and say a bottle of Pepsi. Then my nightmare begins, she says something I don’t understand. (Later it turned out to be 27 rubles please) I panic and tell her I don’t understand Russian, she giggles again and says something, I repeat I don’t understand and I smile. At that point an older lady brings over a calculator which reads the number twenty-seven and that was how I paid for my soda. My trip back to our flat was with minor difficulties, easy. I found the purple wall, the yellow sign and the old brown building. My only problems was when I arrived at our, I guess you would call it our driveway and saw it from a different angle and it didn’t look like it should. About half way down the block I realized that none of the building looked familiar and if I didn’t figure out my mistake I would prove my wife right that it’s a wonder I make it through the day without her and I shouldn’t have gone out in the first place. I turn around and start heading toward the last familiar sign and I’m thinking that I made a turn too early and I need to go over a street when I come across this corner building that from this angle looks like our flat, minor problem solved.
Our Translator, Jenya, that’s how it is said not spelled, picks us up and takes us over to court at 9:20. We arrive nice and early for our court session at 10am. Our support, of Nina from the Orphanage, who is on vacation, arrives, the women from education dept. arrive and we are all set to go.
At ten, we go into the court room and it is small with new dark wood floor white walls that go down to a chair rail and over across from the door is the cage for prisoners. We had been told about the cage and I’d seen enough foreign movies to know about it, it was just odd to actually see it in person and up close. We sat and waited for the Judge to enter the prosecutor came in first wearing a blue color, not exactly powder blue but a light color suit with epilates you know those things that all military people have on their uniforms and he had one star on them. I guess he is part of the military in Russia. He sits down in his chair to the left of the judge’s chair and across from the cage.
We all rise when the judge enters, just like in America, she tells us to be seated. She is wearing a pants suit instead of robes, I don’t know if it was because this was not a trial or that is her usual attire. We sit and the judge makes an opening statement, Jenya translates.
Jenya tells me to stand and read my statement. I begin with my opening “Good morning your honor, my name is Joe Muller, I was born…”. I go right the list like I was told, name, date of birth, place of birth, where I live now and where I work. I stop to take a breath and let Jenya translate. The Judge listens and asks a question. It was what I was hoping for. I felt it would be easier answering her questions then reading a statement and then she asks questions. Her questions start easy, we had been warned that the prosecutor would be the tough questioner and to be prepared, also remember that everyone in the court wants this to happen even if foreigners are adopting their kids.
I have met and interacted with several Russian people in our travels and they have all been friendly and helpful. There have been the few grumpy ones, but no one openly hostile like that nut case Mosha I encountered back in America last year who told me only Russians know how to raise Russian children. I expected more of that resistance, but have found none. We have come across some of the people who we went out to dinner with and have been greeted like old friends and it has made our trip easier.
The Judge gets down to real business when she starts to talk about their medical issues and are we prepared to deal with them. I was under the impression and still am that all of their medical conditions were trumped up to make them available for foreign adoption. They do have issues but they are not life threatening and the worst ones the mitro valve something or other is not serious. The ones I’m concerned about are their eyes, both girls are far sighted and their teeth, Elena still have her baby teeth but they don’t look so good.
The Judge pressed ahead with her questions and I tried to answer them along the guidelines I was given and it got a little rocky but in the end I was told it went well. There was a point where I could read in the judge’s face that she was not happy and she didn’t believe what I was saying. I think it was during the medical portion and maybe that was why she pressed about are we prepared for the costs. The judge even said we were not as rich as some of the people who come into her court to do this. Which if I think about it is true, but we can and will afford this.
Next the prosecutor got to ask questions and his were easier and occasionally the judge would interrupt and expand on one of his questions or switch to some other question.
After I finished they bought the girls into the court and since Nastia was over ten years old the judge had to ask her questions. The Judge was very nice to her asked if she liked us and did they want to go to America and have their name changed to Muller. Did we send them packages and write letters during the time we were apart? She was very nice to Nastia, but she confirmed everything that I had told her earlier about the packages and the letters and our relationship with them while in America. She did a complete job. She just cared about the best thing for the girls.
Next Teri got up did her same intro as me; her name, date of birth, place of birth and so on. The judge asked her questions and at one point I think took a cheap shot at her. Maybe it was a cultural thing and not a cheap shot. The judges asked her if she would be willing to put the girls’ needs ahead of her needs. Anyone who knows Teri well would have never asked that question.
There was another point where the judge asks why are you adopting from Russia aren’t there children in America who need adopting? I was glad I wasn’t answering it because it was a tough question and I had never thought about the reason. Teri did well and got through it.
Then the prosecutor got to ask his questions, there were a few and it was over.
We all stood as the Judge left the room and prepared to wait for her decision. Jenya said we did well and everything was going well.
She was right because within about twenty minutes the judge was back and she awarded the girls to us. She also said that there was a ten day waiting period during which we or anyone else could file an objection to her decision.
It was over, so we went to lunch at the Pit Stop a kind of cafeteria where we got on line and picked food from behind glass. Behind us the Judge got on line and we waved hello and the group of us who were in court all sat together, Jenya, Teri, Me, the education ministry’s representative and Nina from the school orphanage. The five of us squeezed at one table and the judge sat alone right behind us and Teri wanted to invite her over and it would have been nice, but the table was crowded and her suggestion didn’t happen.
After Lunch we went over to the Orphanage to see the girls and we stayed there until about 5pm (2am American) and that was when they went to eat and we went to have dinner in town with CJ and Fran.
Dinner was good and again we drank beer and had some good food and talked and generally celebrated the day.
We got in to our flat about 9:30 Jenya sent her husband to pick the four of us up so there was no talk of taxis. Jenya spent about fifteen months in America and she knows about customer service.
