Several weeks ago the girls and I were in the Palisades Center and Nastia asks me if I would really buy her and her sister t-shirts that said 'Guns don't kill people, Dads with Daughters do' when she has a boyfriend. And like any red blooded American Dad, who was young once and knows what goes on said of course I will. I will let them get to first base, but they better get thrown out if they try to steal second. For a second I forgot my audience and they ask me what is first base, and second ... I point at my lips and say first base, then at my chest and say second base. There my courage deserts me and I point toward the ground near my feet and maybe as high as my ankles and say third base. I don't talk about home.
Elena, always a little more in tune with things that concern sex, which scares me, says third base is the va-jyn-ya. And then I say with all good grace that home is sex and they both get a good laugh at it all and then they ask why is it called first base, second base ...
Friday, November 23, 2012
Almost forgotten stories
I may have talked about this once before, but by telling it a second time I can embellish it and make it better. Do you know who said Details and facts don't matter when telling a good story? Your right and You were paying attention, it was me a few minutes ago.
It was back when Elena was sorta sick. I say sorta because it was equal sick time. Nastia had been sick and Teri had been sick and I was tired of sick people, so when Elena said she was sick and her stomach hurt (good unprovable symptoms when you no longer have a thermometer, lost it and didn't like it anyway.) So I send her to bed, she chooses our bed, like her sister did and I go off to work. Unheard of until recently. I call my mother and ask her to fix the little sick girl lunch. After the fact my mother told me what happened. She went in and asked Elena if she was hungry and she was. Would she like a grilled cheese sandwich?She would. Some of the most vivid memories I have are her, my Mom fixing grilled cheese sandwiches. She would butter the bread, most likely Wonder bread, put a slice of Velveeta cheese between two slices and brown the bread on a medium flame. Just about when it was finished her would flatten the sandwich down with the spatula. She would then cut it half and serve it up. Hot golden toasted bread with melted cheese in the middle, amazing goodness.
Elena watches my mother, the women who taught me to make grilled cheese sandwiches and says : that's not the way to make grilled cheese, that's not the way Daddy does it. Yes, I did change the ingredients and due to time and fear of the butter going bad I seem to never have soft butter to spread on the bread so I melt it in the pan and I know to some purest that is not grilled cheese, its just toasted bread with cheese. Anyway Elena proceeds to tell Grammy how I make grilled cheese. How I melt the butter in the pan, put the bread on the melted butter, then cheese (sharp Cheddar, not Velveeta) and I don't like Wonder bread, I like a crusty dense bread, thicker the better.
Grammy makes Elena, her sandwich and it is as good as ever. So alls well that ends well,I guess.
It was back when Elena was sorta sick. I say sorta because it was equal sick time. Nastia had been sick and Teri had been sick and I was tired of sick people, so when Elena said she was sick and her stomach hurt (good unprovable symptoms when you no longer have a thermometer, lost it and didn't like it anyway.) So I send her to bed, she chooses our bed, like her sister did and I go off to work. Unheard of until recently. I call my mother and ask her to fix the little sick girl lunch. After the fact my mother told me what happened. She went in and asked Elena if she was hungry and she was. Would she like a grilled cheese sandwich?She would. Some of the most vivid memories I have are her, my Mom fixing grilled cheese sandwiches. She would butter the bread, most likely Wonder bread, put a slice of Velveeta cheese between two slices and brown the bread on a medium flame. Just about when it was finished her would flatten the sandwich down with the spatula. She would then cut it half and serve it up. Hot golden toasted bread with melted cheese in the middle, amazing goodness.
Elena watches my mother, the women who taught me to make grilled cheese sandwiches and says : that's not the way to make grilled cheese, that's not the way Daddy does it. Yes, I did change the ingredients and due to time and fear of the butter going bad I seem to never have soft butter to spread on the bread so I melt it in the pan and I know to some purest that is not grilled cheese, its just toasted bread with cheese. Anyway Elena proceeds to tell Grammy how I make grilled cheese. How I melt the butter in the pan, put the bread on the melted butter, then cheese (sharp Cheddar, not Velveeta) and I don't like Wonder bread, I like a crusty dense bread, thicker the better.
Grammy makes Elena, her sandwich and it is as good as ever. So alls well that ends well,I guess.
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