Reflections

  I just saw a movie with Zach Braff, Mandy Patinkin, and Kate Hudson. Zach is an actor who hasn't worked much lately and his wife seems to resent him a little for it. His kids go to religious school paid for by his father, who has just found out he has cancer again.
  I was a little uncomfortable with the movie until I heard Kate's job was with the water company and she was not very happy there. Zach said "she was following the dream."
  If you haven't figured it out yet or are reading this in the future and I am just some dusty picture on a wall, please lets start by dusting off the picture, good. Now as of 2014 July 26, I am without a job and my wife works for the water company and a long time ago she quit following the dream.
  So now that we are caught up you see why this movie was not the one to see when you haven't gone to the movies in about two months.What makes it worse is it is an 'R' rated movie, (do they still use 'R' in the future?) and we bring the girls who at fifteen and thirteen laugh at a lot of wrong times. The Girls said it was a funny movie, I thought it was poignant, you know bitter sweet, moving, touching, you know like the definition I  just looked up

.
  Zach's character looks like he will have to give up the dream or home school the kids. With the tried and true Hollywood script, our hero manages to bumble his way through home school and land on some kind of a journey of self examination where his wife comes to him while he is doing the laundry and says "I haven't seem you in a while." He replies, "I've always been here."
  "No" she says,"I haven't seem this you in a long time."
Enough said there is a happy ending even though Mandy Patinkin's character dies, but not before Zach gets his brother to their father's bed side so they can repair their relationship.
  Easy, Hollywood simple,I should of written it.
I'll leave you to draw any conclusions.


Reflections Part 2.
  I was a little surprised to have my own words thrown back at me one day recently.
  I told Nastia, that most all boys want one thing, sex and they are all pigs. Naturally I did not intend to include myself in that category, but I am, or was a boy and all I was interested in when I was young was sex and I guess that makes me a pig, like all the other males in this world.
  Before we go on, I have to say I told her that because she is naive and too trusting and Elena has been doing her dating out of my eye site mostly.

  So one evening I'm at the table and Nastia is in a slightly short night shirt having taken her shower. She lies on my lap, face down. I look down and see a round bottom poking well out of her night shirt and her panties have ridden up a touch on one of her cheeks. So without a thought a lightly tap her cheek and call the dog to bit it. She jumps up and I don't remember everything she says but some of it was pervert and all boys are pigs and a couple of others. I was very surprised and a little hurt, but I knew she was trying it out to see how it felt to use it. And I will say I won't do that again.

  Elena has been a different person lately. She has been so full of life and adventure I find myself talking to her and yelling a lot less. I give her more freedom and I hope the change in her is not the fact that she is out of school and the moods will return when school does. I really hope it is a physical change and she might be growing out of her problems. I am not holding my breath and we are going forward with tests for ADD. If her behavior doesn't change I won't give her the pills.I don't want to anyway. I hate to take medicine unless I have to and I don't want her to. So lets hope.

Boyfriends.. dead ahead...good god...help me.

   Elena has been dating, I've removed the ' ' because she tried to french kiss him on his birthday. It's sorta funny until you start to think what else she might give him in the future, yuck.
   Nastia was the one who provided the information. She announced it to everyone in front of Elena and you can understand why she is angry at Nastia. I just wonder why she still tells her things.
   Now on to Nastia. She got rid of her face time boyfriend, Justin, who I had grown to dislike anyway. I tried not to let her know I didn't like him. He went really south in my opinion when I told him that Nastia was in trouble and couldn't text him until at least Friday. He gives me the OK sir, I'm sorry bit. Then a day later I see on Elena's phone that he was texting Elena trying to get her to have Nastia text him without me finding out. I replied that She wouldn't or something like that and he said He was sorry, he just missed her so much.
 I gave Nastia her phone back on Friday, but asked both of them not to contact Justin until Monday because he was being punished for trying to go behind my back. Thankfully she dumped him and this time she blocked him from the phone and x-box.  Now comes the be careful what you wish for has happened. Nastia now has a real boyfriend, his name is Anthony. He came over today to swim with Nastia while Elena went to Matt's house to hang out (french kiss?? , Nah she can't play x-box here and can over there. That has to be it)
  Well I leave the two of them alone to swim after Elena goes to Matt's and it is quiet. So I look out and see the two of them in the clinches like two tired prize fighters. I turn on the radio and get a glass of water and drink it without looking out the window, but plainly seen. A few moments later
  Nastia come to the window and asks "Is everything is OK?."
   I say "yes, just listening to the radio." I then tell her, "more swimming, less hugging." I don't know if I'm made to do this.
 They get out of the pool and play cards some, then Nastia asks to go in the tent with Anthony, I say No. She then wants to play X-box. At first I say no then say OK. I pop in every so often to check on them and I guess it went OK.
  A little after five Anthony's Dad shows up and He goes. There was no kissing, just hands touching arms.
  When I'm up to it they can do it again.
  Elena might be the smart one, she has started doing her dating out of my sight. I need to think about both sides of that coin.
 

Several degrees of separation.

Starting in the Fall, the girls will go to separate schools for the second and last time. The first time, two years ago was different. They were younger and had not begun to develop individual separate lives, even just a little. Nastia has a friend, Kaley, who is right now her best friend. Elena, has Jessica as her best friend. Back two years ago, they were each others best friend. Separate lives are one of our goals for them. At this stage of life they irritate each other over sometimes the simplest things. Elena doesn't want her sister to tell her what to do. Nastia can't help playing mother hen to her because she has done that all of Elena's life.
   So this summer has been a good change. Nastia has gotten to invite Kaley over to go swimming and Kaley has invites Nastia to go to Germonds pool.

   Elena invites Jessica to come over and swim and Jessica invites Elena to go to the Bronx Zoo without Nastia. Elena went out with Mathew, 'her boyfriend' (how much longer I will be able to use ' ' over boyfriend I don't know.) to dinner with his parents for his birthday. Elena ordered Smoked Salmon for an Appetizer and baby back ribs for the main meal. She didn't get back until 10:30 and I was starting to look out the windows to see if she was outside and I just didn't see her. I need to work on being a parent of teenage daughters who will be dating for real, you know no ' ' over the name. They will be on their own and doing all that ecky stuff that I used to do and my mother never asked about or want to know about and only one girlfriends mother let me know she worried about. I have to be less tightly wrapped.
   My mother's sex advise consisted of never let me know you got a girl in trouble. I've always wondered what she meant by that. Was it maybe like a girlfriend had a library book that needs to be returned today and if it isn't it would be late and I told her "Don't worry there will be no repercussions if you return it tomorrow.Or maybe it's more like I won't com....nah, too naughty to finish that thought.

 I did something the other day that if Teri knew she would maybe be pissed. So don't tell her all...two of you.
I gave both girls their second driving lessons. Second, you say? yes, the first one was done upstate two or so years ago when I let them sit on my lap and steer that big old Buick( and steer as we drove through town)*
   * I know it is only a snippet of a line, but what song does big old Buick come from?
We went over to Clarkstown South High School. This was not something planned. We had tried to visit my mother, but she was not home and they complained they were bored. So I went around the school told them a few stories about my time there and then I pulled into the parking lot furthest from the school and told Nastia to get into the drives seat. We went over mirrors and blind spots and changing lanes and reaching the peddles. Then I let her move the car. I had her just touch the gas and make believe there were eggs under the pedal she did not want to break. She touched the pedal and when she just bumped up the rpms and I was happy with that I then let her put the car in neutral and let it glide down the hill putting on the brake to slow and stop the car without jerking it. At the bottom of the hill I then turned it around and let her us the gas and go up hill. After a short while she was driving up and down the hill keeping it relatively straight.
   There then came a point where Elena said what about me.I told her in a year and a half I would let her do what her sister did. I then changed my mind and let her use the brake going down hill and maybe I let her go up hill once.

Ruth Darrow Smith  Moffett, my Grandmother 1920's

  It all reminds me of when my mother taught me how to drive upstate going down our driveway and the first time my Dad let me move the car and all I did way put it in drive and it moved on it's own. It seemed to be going so far. He then told me to stop it and I hit the brakes bouncing the car a little. Great memories, really great.

* My Hometown Bruce Springsteen
  I was eight years old and running with a dime in my hand
Into the bus stop to pick up a paper for my old man
I'd sit on his lap in that big old Buick and steer as we drove through town
He'd tousle my hair and say son take a good look around this is your hometown
This is your hometown
This is your hometown
This is your hometown

And the rockets red glare, the bombs bursting in mid-air gave proof through the night that our flag was still there....

Had a full day today. For the last few days it has been raining. Amanda took the tent and didn't return it until tonight, but with all the rain it didn't matter. The Girls still have nine weeks to sleep out.
   The rain kept up until early afternoon, when Teri thought taking in a movie was a good idea. We went to see 'How to train your Dragon II' It got good reviews.
   After that we were going to eat dinner at home then go to the fireworks in Nyack. Time got away from us and we ate at mash burger on the Nanuet/Spring Valley border. Burgers were good, fries were nothing special.
  We got to Nyack about nine and walked down to Memorial Park. I bought some folding chair and opened one up as the fireworks just started. We had positioned ourselves in the road, just past the houses, at a break in the trees. The night was breezy and a little cool, perfect to watch fireworks.
   On the walk down some memories of other times came to mind.
   Annya and Leonid's visit with us two summers ago. I remember walking back up from the park and they were ahead of me and I had to really stretch my legs to catch up and thought it would be fun to finally have someone who had long legs and could keep up with me when I walked. I wonder where they are now? Annya is still in the orphanage. Leonid, most likely in the army. I hope they are happy.
   Walking past a side street off main, I remembered coming down to a Pizza Parlor for June's birthday, parking on a side street and seeing a little vegetable garden I man had grown using his front lawn and in it were corn stalks over ten feet tall. It was amazing.

  The last story happened on another July 4th, about ten or so years ago when Tony, Teri's father was going to drive down to the fireworks and it was a hot humid night and I told him it was easier to walk down and back. I bet him I could beat him back to the house if I walked. I did win, but I was drenched in sweat and in the long run it didn't matter in the least. It didn't take that much more time and was most likely a lot easier.

Tenting tonight and allowing ourselves to greive.

Nastia somehow got it in to her head that she wanted to sleep outside in a tent. Teri has an almost brand new Swiss Army tent that has been in the garage for several years... So guess who slept outside? It was a big event for the girls. Elena had her friend Jessica over and she wanted to join them and I said yes.
  Congers fireworks were the same night. My leg hurt and Teri was in a mood. (More later) So we stayed home. Eventually we all ended up standing in the backyard watching the fireworks. The Girls went up to the street to get a better look.
  That is when Teri let down her guard a little and got past the anger and cried a little over the fireworks. She quietly said "That one is one that my mother loved"It was a tough couple of weeks if you think about it. Her mother's birthday, her father's birthday and between the two their anniversary. It's been four years, maybe five since her mother's gone and she might only now be allowing herself to feel the loss. She is a strong driven person. I wish I was like her more.
   As a few tears trickled down her cheek, I took her in my arm for a moment. The fireworks had ended and the girls were coming back and Teri didn't want to have to explain why she was crying, it would take away from the release of feelings and lessen its effect.
   The Girls then piled into the tent.

Teri was worried they would be cold and we went inside. About three in the morning Nastia came into to use the bathroom, but that was all we saw of them the whole night.
  The next morning Teri went to work, and I let the girls sleep in and went to try to refinance the house.
   The short on that is the income is enough, the equity in the house is short. We'd end up with a third of what I wanted to retire all the short term bills.
   I got back in time to drive Nastia over to Germonds pool to swim with Kaley, leaving Elena and Jessica at the house to swim.
   By early afternoon Elena and Jessica were...come on take a guess. It's the first week of summer vacation. What would you of told your mother? Yea, we were never bored. There was always something to do as a kid in the 60's and 70's. There were kids around all the time, you could play baseball, go swimming, tell your mother you were bored. It was so different! I don't think it was better, just different.
  Jessica's mom calls around three and I tell her Jessica wants to sleep over again. She is fine with that except she has group. I say she can go and come back later.

   I get a call from Teri sometime around Five saying Jessica's mom just called and said Nastia was face timing her boyfriend from the tent in only her underwear. Everyone was all upset and after I calmed down I went outside and asked Elena to come and sit next to me on the stairs of the deck and I asked her if anything happened in the tent that shouldn't of. She goes "like what?" Sometimes I can read body language, other times like everyone else I am so wrapped up in myself that I don't take the time to look at the signs that are in front of me. I didn't look at Elena's body language to see if she was hiding anything, or not telling the truth. I went to pick up Nastia and we talked  and I didn't read her body language. I was not in the tent last night so I have to believe Nastia it didn't happen. I also told her I took someone else's word for the truth and when it turned out to be a lie I didn't talk to her for two days I was so hurt. I also reminded her little punishment now, later the truth comes out, much bigger trouble.
  When We got home Teri was there and she wanted to know what happened. Nastia said nothing happened. Teri said there was a video made.and to get her phone.
   On the phone was Nastia saying "I want to f... you in the pool, I want to f... you in the bed and a few other things. She said it was on a dare from Jessica and Elena. Later Elena says it was Justin's dare.
   The fall out is hard to tell. Jessica didn't come back last night and they tent was lent out to Amanda for a few days.
   When the tent comes back, Nastia can't sleep out with Jessica. L don't know who's rule that is, but it tells Nastia we don't believe her, and I guess we don't. We know the dare part is a lie. And we know Nastia does sometimes sleep without a shirt on when it's too hot.The next morning she was fully clothed.
  I know for a fact that things happen in a tent when you sleep out. That is the fun of sleeping out. My friend, Mike and I got into all kinds of mischief when we slept out. Is there a double standard because they are girls or there is the time difference of  forty-five or so years?

Wearing shirts from four years ago

Or is it take what happens in the tent stays in the tent was broken? Are we making a big deal over this because Nastia and Elena violated every rule I put down for use of X-box and gave out names, phone numbers and addresses to her internet boyfriend ? All I know of this kid is what I hear over x-box and the random text I read off Nastia's phone.He was texting and wanting to face time her all the time to the point she had no time to herself. She put limits on it, I was pleased. He comes off as needy and lonely. The few facts I know about him is he curses alot. He plays x-box at all hours of the night and day. We let the girls get up at five on a Saturday to play and they were playing with him. He eats his dinner in his room, maybe not all, but I don't know. I should be thankful that he can't touch her. There was talk of him coming down from where he lives to see her. Nastia had it in her mind he would stay with us.I killed that right there. I said "I will not have a complete stranger under my roof, in my house, near my daughter. You want to go on a date with him, my fifteen year old daughter? here are the rules. He comes down with his parents for a day trip or they find some place to stay,not here. I need notice. If he is showing up on Saturday, I want to know about it on the Monday before. You will go on a date like Elena did, with adult supervision to Dave and Busters or some place like that where I can meet the parents and not be stuck with talking to them for a lot time, if I don't want to. He will not be alone with my fifteen year old daughter. When you get older it will be different. Am I being too easy? hee, hee. God sometimes there is fun in my misery.
   The picture above resulted from me finding two shirts from when they first were over here. I had the bright idea that they should try them on and they did. The picture doesn't tell it, but it made them both look a few years older and scared me. Nastia loved the fact it didn't cover her stomach and Elena loved that if she wore it all day she could push me in the pool.

Father's Day, Ellis Island, Statue of Liberty

I didn't know what to expect for Father's day today because I am midway through the fifth month of unemployment, money is tight and will disappear in about a month.
  I got up early because Mesha doesn't do quiet mornings.

I let the three dogs, four with Nancy over last night out in the morning usually when I wake up around five. After Mesha comes back in she usually completely awake and manages to get everyone else up for at least a few moments. I was up at five went back to sleep and finally got up around eight. I was told to go back to bed and a few moments later the girls come into the room with cards and a father's day gift.
  I got a t-shirt and another card which has become a tradition. The card had a little Donkey on a big one and talked about being a pain in the ... It goes with the two moon card and the leave my nuts alone squirrel card. Not really childish cards.

   The tickets for Ellis Island and the Statue of Liberty were for today so we all ate  and got ready to leave. We left around eleven and got down there after twelve. Got to the pier and even with the wind the ocean was pretty flat. I was happy, didn't want to throw up on father's day. I love the ocean, but it don't love me back. We got on the boat and the calm sea was really long low rollers about a foot or so high and it surprisingly rolled the boat pretty good. I felt it in my stomach and Nastia said she didn't feel so well. It was a short trip to Ellis Island and we roamed over the arrival building. Something like this is almost a religious experience. I am walking in the foot steps of the people who came before me. The people who made me and took that long dangerous trip to America for whatever reason. We stayed a couple of hours there, had a little something to eat and enjoyed the beautiful, bright sun shiny day.

   We got back on the boat to go to the Statue of Liberty and the boat moved out. When we got close to the Statue I started taking pictures. Something made me stop and start looking around the boat. Traditional Americans, you know us guys, white Europeans were few and far between. There were people from India and the middle east and Asia. All these different places from around the world snapping pictures of the Statue like it was going to pick up and move somewhere else tomorrow. It was amazing. I don't know if they were tourists or recently minted Americans, it was just totally amazing. Everyone was just so interested in the Statue.
  At the Statue, we wandered around. I bought a pocket knife with me and when we went through the first set of security at Liberty State Park they said when I went to the Statue to put the knife in a locker, boy did Teri have fun with me bring a knife. At the Statue we stuffed everything we didn't need in the locker.We bought jackets in case it was cold, it was hot,

I bought a knife and there was no wood to whittle (That's country talk where you take a perfectly good piece of wood and strip off sections of it until you have a pile of wood carvings. Some people carve stuff from it too) All that stuff went into the locker and none of us missed it. We only had tickets for the pedestal,so Teri and I got on line for the elevator.A Park Ranger kept walking by saying ten minutes by elevator, three minutes by stairs. Teri looks at me and says "NO" . I'm fine with it,my knee is not 100%, but the girls and Nancy wanted to do the stairs, so off they go. A few moments later Teri goes "You want to try it, she says it's only three minutes?" Well it was only three minutes until we decided to stop and take a break, That was one of I think three breaks, not minutes. I don't know how long it took us. Most likely not too much more then three minutes, but boy I'm gettin too old for this s...* In the past I would of run up those stairs.
  At the pedestal, we had a great view of everything. It was crowded and We didn't stay long. Going down the stairs was quick and a little easier.
  We got back to the car and headed home, that's when the day went a little south. The GPS insisted on taking us through the Holland Tunnel. Before that it took us on side roads and in a big circle. It gives options for routes and I think we picked the one that said to get lost in Jersey City. We got back home with a flat tire. Mesha for the first time had been left alone for an extended period of time. And She tore up the section of the house we didn't block off.

   We got the mess cleaned up and the tire switched off the car and after that things got calm until I realize Elena hadn't studied for her finals today or yesterday. Well I won't go into details except to say she knew she had to study and it felt like she was figuratively giving me the finger. She said she wasn't and just forgot...maybe.



*Danny Glover in Lethal Weapon

Too cold for Fireworks and in the pool ten days later

We went to the West Nyack Firehouse Carnival over at the town pool. Not that I'm bragging because Congers is really nothing, but West Nyacks was small. It was also cold . It's the last few days of May and no one wants to wear jackets. Teri and Nancy have jackets and as I'm going out the door I remember how it can be on the water during May and I grab a jacket and a sweater, Teri laughs at me and I leave the jacket in the car.It's early evening and we have come for the fireworks and the girls the rides. They get wrist bands and we spend fifty dollars. After a few rides, I think the girls are rode out,no they just want to win gold fish. We say no, they have wrist bands for rides.
 It starts go get dark and the temperature starts to go down too. After a while I even go get my jacket. The girls continue to ride. They went on several rides and when they stopped in front of the win a gold fish game. I knew what was next. "Mommy, Daddy, we want to win gold fish." Together, Teri and I said "NO" . I hate it because the fish is abused at the carnivals and die soon after they are home. Teri and I both didn't like the fact we just spent fifty dollars on wrist bands and they are already onto doing something else. There were no fish that night. They rode some more rides several times in a row, not even getting up to go around again and get on line. And yes we sat or stood around as it got colder and colder.
  About quarter to nine another m-80 went off and everyone jumped.  About this time is when Teri came up with the joke about it being too cold for the fireworks and we should go home. Nancy and I agreed. Teri figuring she was not going to win mother of the year anyway agreed.
 When the Girls got off this swing type ride Teri told them it was too cold for the fireworks to work and the two m-80 explosions was them testing them out. We got an "Awwh" from Nastia and Teri said we could go out for Ice Cream and we went to a Frozen Yogurt place in New City.    
  The Pool
  It was the usual opening the pool. The cover didn't keep a lot of the fall leaves out of the pool, Tthe holes in the cover and the pillow in the pool deflating didn't help.

So like usual I emptied the pool. I don't swim a lot, but I can't swim in a pool full of chemicals. I got the girls to go in the water and scoop out the leaves and Teri found the hole in the liner, I fixed it, then filled it. At almost full I stopped for the night. It had filled slowly and I thought it was because of bad water pressure, it wasn't. The level dropped down to almost a foot when I finally went into the water to find the hol. It was a foot away from the side and near the ladder. It was big. I fixed it and was about to get out when Teri came outside and said I should look for other holes. I figured what were the chances of other holes after I fixed these two big ones, but I did and after about twenty minutes found two more holes on the opposite side of the ladder. With those fixed the pool filled up very quickly and even though it was cold outside and the pool water was still the temperature out of the tap, the girls as soon as they got home went swimming. Crazy Russians!                                                                                             

What do you do when your child plays you and your wife has warned you trust is earned??

I know, its a long title, its a complex problem for me. I'll tell you the story and lets see where it goes...
  Elena gets to play x-box for circle sheets with threes and twos. For all the uninformed a circle sheet grades her daily between 3, the best and zero the worst everyday in every subject in four categories, homework, participation in class, arriving to class on time and behavior in class.
  Yesterday, for the second time in a row she did not bring home her circle sheet. Tuesday I asked her why and what she thought she got on the circle sheet giving her an opportunity to get x-box time she told me she left the sheet in school or something like that and would not venture a guess on how she did. I thought she didn't realize I wanted to give her x-box time, now I think she knew how bad the sheet was and chose not to bring the sheet home.
   Yesterday again no circle sheet and again I ask why and what did she think she got. She pulled the old, well I put it in my backpack and now I can't find it. I used to pull that when Iwas in school. I put it in my desk and I don't know what happened to it so I should have caught this one. I let her play x-box. She played two hours and then I had her come in and help me make eggplant parm. We both worked together, had fun and got dinner ready to put in the oven. Never a word about school.
  We sit down at the table and I hear something from Nastia about detention and Teri is asking Elena to tell her and she is refusing. Nastia tells what happened and it is in a relaxed playful environment so everything and everyone is cool. Elena got four detentions for I don't even remember what at this point. I start cleaning up and realize I am angry and I think it is because only Teri and I had the eggplant parm and the girls didn't even try it. No, it wasn't that. I call Elena down from upstairs and I wait for here in the kitchen. She comes to the door and stands there.
  I tell her, "I am in the kitchen here thinking I'm angry over the fact only your mother and I tried the eggplant, when I'm angry over the fact that you played me. I told her I was hurt because she knew she had detention and had not intention of telling anyone and she played x-box on top of that. I LET HER PLAY X-BOX WITHOUT A CIRCLE SHEET BECAUSE I WANT TO TRUST HER!!!!!! I didn't yell that at her, just at you now. Later after our talk I remember we had a talk about her not staying after school for track and I didn't believe her track is cancelled.
   I felt bad so I called her down and said "I am choosing to believe you that track was cancelled today and I'm sorry that I didn't believe you before."
  Her response was "That's OK, I don't care what people say to me."
  I told her I hoped she would care what I said to her. and she left.
  I remembered that after our talk and wanted to call her down and discuss it with her. Teri said I was dragging it out and should have done it all at once and I shouldn't start it all up again. I let it go, but now I feel very hurt by her and I didn't even want to talk to her this morning. In the car when her music was too loud, I grabbed her phone and turned it down without asking her to. I will get over this, its just right now I feel very hurt by her and it seems she doesn't care because she got what she wanted. I will try to not take my anger out on her in the following days. I've just got to remember, without anger what happened here and to make her earn my trust again and I told Teri I don't think we should reward her for any more good behavior. It has set a bad precedent and I am the most guilty one.
   Where do we go from here I don't know. I guess like parents for thousands of years Teri and I will play it by ear and hope for the best. There is so much good in her.


 
 

Mesha, one week later

I think our dog is defective, she leaks. It has been a week and I let her out at eleven pm again about 3 am and sometime about 5 am or so and I thought she was getting the idea that she was to do her business (come on don't make me spell it out, OK, pee and crap outside) but she hasn't yet. Teri keeps saying she had Mosha trained in a week, Mosha was smart. Mesha she keeps tilting her head when you talk to her like she doesn't understand.
  One morning, about three, I get up without turning on the lights and go towards the girls room. About half way down the hall I step in something squishy with my toes. I know what it is, I pick my foot up quickly, like it really matters and put it back down with just my heal touching intending to limp over to the bathroom to clean off my foot. When I put my heel down it squishes into some more. I've  stumbled into a mine field, in the dark expertly put down by our new dog to stop anyone from getting to the girls room our backing up without stepping on a mine. I manage to get out of the mine field without further damage and clean off my foot. I close the door to our room and turn on the light to clean the hallway. Except for it not being on the walls,what I see, is it looks like an pile of crap has exploded in the hallway. I grab a roll of paper towels, a plastic bag and the spray and get to work. When I'm done a good section of the rug, about six feet long looks nice and clean. The rug is ripped and worn out, but this section looks really good. It stays that way for about the rest of the night, our new dog it turns out has, as my wife would say 'the diarrhea'. Not to go into too many stories, but there is one where I let her out, she comes back in, craps in the hallway, I catch her, she stops, I put her outside, clean up, bring her back in and she finishes when my back is turned cleaning up a pee stain. Ahh, life with a new puppy, can you blame me for not finding a job?
   We started giving her some rice with her food and the problems have lessened. So far she sleeps on the floor, by the bed. There is no room on the bed with Athena and sometimes Bandi there. She has chewed several wires and charging cords, one I don't know what it is to. One Nastia threw out with some crap she cleaned up and I had to go through the garbage to dig it out. Her reasoning was, "Well its all chewed up, its no good." Silly girl she doesn't know she lives in the house of unlimited duct tape and black electrical tape. I got out my knife and tape, a few minutes later it was all fixed. Now if I knew what it was to!

Mesha, the German Sheffer

We got a new dog, her name is Mesha. She is a ten week old rescue dog, full breed German shepherd. Someone saw her advertised at Dapper Dog in Central Nyack and told Teri. I got the phone call from Teri about ten in the morning. I have to saw that she at least asks me about a crazy purchase like this. I don't like to say no to Teri about most things, because she works real hard and they are mostly reasoned out requests, this one wasn't. We currently have, including Mesha, Athena, Bandy, and the cats Benastork and Niki. It is going to be a madhouse at feeding time at the zoo.
 Teri says they can't hold the dog and I need to go give 500 cash and go over and buy the dog. I agree to go over to Dapper Dog and see if the dog is still there, hoping it wasn't. I got the money and went over and the dog was there, but the person who handles the dog was not, this was 10:30 Wednesday morning. I wait in my car listening to the radio until about 11:15, when my car battery dies. I call my mother ans ask her to come over and give my my car a jump.
 I get my car started before my mom arrives. I try to call her and she doesn't have her cell phone with her.
    The women finally shows up and is now cutting a dogs hair, I wait, there is nothing I have to do being out of a job for the last three months. My mom comes, hangs out for a few minutes, buys a couple of collars for her dogs and goes. I continue to wait.

  Finally after about an hour, she is done. She invites me behind the counter to meet the dog and proceeds to treat me like I am some virgin dog owner, who she needs to read the riot at to. I came in thinking she knew us from taking on Bandi after June died. She goes on about how this dog is going to need a lot of attention and she will chew on things so you need to do this and that. After a while, I'm asking myself why I'm still here. She eases up a bit and we start to talking and exchange a few stories. I tell her about Athena, how we rescued her. She asks what happened to her, like she expects that we killed her and buried her in the backyard dog cemetery.
  While waiting, I'd had time to check out the dog food she had., not unexpected it was expensive. She asks me what I feed our dogs, I know it is a trick question, but I can not see how. I answer Alpo. WRONG ANSWER!! Oh, that stuff is the worst. It is made with mostly water and meat by products, it makes them go to the bathroom a lot, effects their kidneys. Knowing that we are in the homestretch I ask what she has been feeding the dog., she says 'Blue'. I grab a large bag of it for fifty dollars and she throws in a couple of cans of blue and a few dog chews. I give her $300.00 for the dog and finally I'm out the door with Teri texting me whats going on, why is it taking so long. I text her back I have the dog.
  I put towels on the front seat and lay the dog there.We start to go and she immediately climbs into the next to an empty box I had there. (the picture above). I get her home and for the rest of the day I nurse maid the dogs to make sure they are getting along. Athena was nipping at Mesha's ear,Bandi was his usual grouchie self.
How the Dog got her name:

  When I got home I'd needed to call the dog something. We had just seen a movie called Bears and I thought that would be a good name. I knew Teri would not like it. So, I called her Bear.
  When everyone got home home it was naming time and I said I was calling her Bear and why. No one liked it. Then Teri asks what is Bear in Russian? While looking it up Nancy says in most Russian fairy tails bears are called Mesha, so she was called Mesha.

Kristen's Wedding

It seems like only yesterday, sorry Kristen, that I baby sat Kristen for the one and only time. She was old enough to talk, but still was still wearing Diapers .
  Now she is married and I feel no older then I did then, except for a few gray hairs, some would say more then a few, but I only got a few hairs and an extra thirty pounds I feel the same.

  The wedding was beautiful, the day, cold and over cast. The day before was warm and sunny, as was the day after. It didn't take anything away from a great wedding.
  They were wed at St. Anthony's old church, a very beautiful church. When ever there is a wedding in a Catholic Church the stories about lying to the Priest always start to circulate. To blow my own horn, I refused to lie to the Priest, so we didn't get married where Teri's parents got married, in Nyack. It was over the questions the Priest would ask. The one about will you raise your children as Catholics, I told Teri I would not, this was about the time of all the sexual allegations about Priest. If we ever renew our vows, I will raise any further children Catholic.
  The reception was at the Rockleigh Country Club, nice place, been there, done that before. Mike Marsico was married there in 1988

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  We walked into the cocktail hour a little late. I could be happy with just the cocktail hour food, this was even better then normal. Elena and I hit the French Fry and slider station first. I then went to the calamari and other Italian food station. I should of quit there, but I went on.
  After the Cocktail hour we sat down to an abundance of food. There was bread and butter, there was more food then I can remember. I had a great steak, some chocolate covered Strawberries. So much food that I could not look at the wedding cake when they served it. It looked good, couldn't touch it. Best wedding I've been to in many a year.

Bronx Zoo and Dinner at Charlie Browns

  It is near the end of Easter vacation for the girls and I am dying to get back to the new old routine. So Teri decided it was time to try out the new Bronx Zoo membership.
  Yesterday we had lunch at Dave and Busters and let the girls run out all the chips we had acquired on several cards over the years.
  We left today and took a round about route to The Bronx Zoo. It was crowded and we got in at the Bronx River entrance. It was unusually cold, only 42 when we got there. It would top out at 48. We took in the Bird house first because it was warm and inside. Then we worked our way deeper into the Park ending up at the opposite corner sometime around three. We saw Baboons, Lions, almost Gorillas, Elk, and animals from Madagascar. It was busy and we covered a lot of ground and didn't see everything. We have a yearly membership, so it is free to go back. And We will.
  It was late and no one wanted to cook so we hit Charlie Browns and I ordered beer like I had a job. Food was good and everyone enjoyed themselves. Nastia had Salmon and Elena had Chicken fingers and French fries.

Revenge of the Teenage Mutant Ninja daughter or Does Father know best

It was a little before eight in the morning in Happyville when Teenage Mutant Ninja Daughter walks into the kitchen. Father knows best notices his daughter is dressed up and in black. He still sees his daughters as the little kids they were four years ago when they came over from Russia. Back then when they were asked if they wanted more and didn't like something they said "Oh, its good, no thank you." but that's another story.
  Kitten (another father knows best reference) goes to Papa, trying to divert attention from her short shirt over spandex " Don't You like the way I look.I'm dressed all in black." Father knows best has noticed, but not the short shirt, which is covered by a rain jacket type jacket ( If she was a flasher at least she'd have the right coat on) Father knows best looks her over and is about to tell her how pretty she looks when a hand darts out from behind her and gives a tug on a garment unseen until now. His eyes linger for a moment until he realizes she is wearing spandex and either forgot to put on a skirt or she is wearing a shirt that is too short for that outfit. Father knows best tries to play it cool, he still remembers being a teenager. He asks "Is that an outfit your mother made up or did you put it together?"

Athena questions why wear clothes if you wear that

  The Teenage Mutant Ninja daughter sees red lights go off around her, her sister is comforted in the knowledge it is not her wearing the clothes. Teenage Mutant Ninja daughter knows there could be trouble. She coyly replies "What outfit?" Father knows best repeats his question and she is trapped and out witted.    She plays her mother card but not really well, answering the question. Mommy bought this for me over the weekend.
  Father knows best senses something is not right and takes out his camera and snaps a picture of her and e-mails his wife. The Teenage Mutant Ninja daughter nervously pulls at her almost visible skirt.
  Father knows best finishes his e-mail and asks his daughter to turn around and bend over. Yes it is not polite to ask a teenage mutant ninja daughter to do this but when he sees nothing but butt the gig is up and Father knows best starts in on his "Your not going to school dressed like that speech". He peppers it with ' I still remember what it is to be a teenager. and I was young once.and You think you can handle boys until a two hundred pound boy has you pinned to the floor of the boys locker and there is no one around' and other classics like that. I know some might feel I am being too protective and demanding of my children, but I rather error on the side of safety then to regret it for the rest of my life. Go in peace,the mass is over.

Take My kids, please*

*For all you kids out there who don't get the reference, Henny Youngman was known for the catch line "Take my wife, no please take her." yea you got to be a Jewish vaudeville comedian to get a laugh from that joke.

Well it has been an interesting time here lately. I was recently unemployed, so I was having lunch at home about two in the afternoon, when my phone rings. It was Brian Clemente, a nice guy I have gotten to know over the last few years from Felix Festa Middle School. He is the dean of  punishment or something like that for students. Him and I have over the last few years talked about why one daughter or another was in need of detention. I know your shrieking right now not those little darlings!! Yes, those little darlings. They are not longer begging strangers for money in the streets of Nyack, usually they just tell me how much money I owe them. These Angels from heaven, (Is that what they call Russia these days in Crimea.) are getting into normal trouble like bring a knife to school or teasing a fellow student.
  The call from Mr Clemente involved a knife. It was a small two inch Swiss army knife that I had given Nastia, because she had wanted a knife and asked several times. The first thing I told her was  'DON'T BRING IT TO SCHOOL.' Well that was several months ago and the warning was not renewed, so it must not apply any more. SO SHE BOUGHT IT TO SCHOOL!! A teacher saw it when she showed it to a fellow student and she and the knife were sent to Mr Clemente's office. He called me and I expected him to say he has Elena in front of him and was surprised when he said Nastia. I groaned when he said she had bought a knife to school. He continued by saying she has made good progress over the years and I could come and pick up the knife at school. To say the least, I was not happy.
   Then I go back to lunch,I am eating a very good salad and reading an interesting book. I am chewing on a mouthful of salad when the phone rings again. Come on you knew it was going to happen. I figured it was a follow up to the knife issue, it wasn't. "Hi Mr. Muller this is Mr. Clemente again I have a problem with Elena... My Youngest has become a bully. She doesn't see it as being a bully. She says it is all in fun. The fun is four girls, with her in the lead teasing this one girl called Anna Lisa. This poor girl from what I have heard from the stories Elena has told seems like a train wreck. Elena considers her a friend and with friends like Elena this girl needs new friends. Elena related a story about how this girl wanted to better herself and her helpful friend said in a 2014 version for a Valley girl "Well, start with girl, a breath mint," Then Elena says something about deodorant and I stop her story and tell her she is not being a good friend.
  Mr Clemente relates how she walks by this girl in class and flips the girls book closed and this was the latest in a long line of what is considered bullying she has done. He gave me what the punishment would be and I said OK and she will be dealt with when she gets home.
  I once more go back to my lunch and as I am finishing it up, yep, you guessed it I get another phone call. This one is from Dr. Benjamin school psychologist and she would like to speak with Val and needs my permission.I had nothing better to do so I told her I would be there in ten minutes to sign the paper.
  When I get to the school we go into a conference room off the office to talk about the youngest. Dr Benjamin tells me how Elena leads with four other girls ganging up on this one new girl in class, Anna Lisa. The punishment has been soft up to now, but that was going o change. I tell her that whatever is the worst punishment for Elena needs to be the first punishment for her. She needs to understand that bullying is not tolerated by anybody. I don't want to hear my child is picking on anyone. In school I was teased in school and I will never allow my child to treat anyone like that.
  It was now twenty after three and he girls got out of school at 3:35, I waited. I asked the office have Elena meet me at the office before she went to bowling. When the bell rings I expect Elena to show up, I wait and I wait, Finally Nastia shows up and asks me why I am here. I tell her I am waiting for her sister and why did she bring a knife to school. She gives me that 'I don't understand what you are talking about' look that sets me off and I start in om her about how she was told not to bring a knife to school and how she now no longer owns a knife because she bought it to school. She starts in about how she just wanted to show it to someone when her sister comes into view. I say now that you got me going it's your turn and I look at Elena. I tell her to follow me and to move don't walk slow, which is what she does anyway.
  I calm down with the walk to the car. In side I tell her that she is a bully and it has to stop. We talk about the time in camp where the kids were teasing her and she called them 'garbage head' and they were bullies. How did it make you feel. During our talk Nastia keeps calling and I hang up not wanting to talk to her. It seems she alway needs to get into the middle of things with unimportant questions or problems. I take Elena to bowling. Teri and I talk about all of this and Elena loses her computer, her phone, her ipad and the x box for one week with promises of more if she doesn't stop.
  Take my kids, please.

55 inches all winter, so far...

  We have about five official weeks of winter left. There is an historic drought in California and we here in New York are at about 55 inches of snow, just short of the most ever recorded, in 1994-5.

  I remember 1994-5 only because the News predicted we would get three feet of snow. We lived in Nyack, on a small lot. I went out to Locks Hardware in Valley Cottage, just off the corner of Kings Highway and Lake Rd. there is a small shopping mall there now and bought a snow blower at the inflated price of $1,300.00 I justified it by the three feet of snow we were going to get and we did get it, big time. The drifts were up to the porch in the front of the house. This brand new horse of a snow blower made short work of the drifts, the driveway and sidewalk. Then I went around doing a number of neighbors sidewalks. That is where the expression came from, 'are you out blowing the neighborhood again?' .After all of that I walked the snow blower down the street to Catherine St. and Teri's parents house doing the sidewalk as I went. The Snow blower is still the one I have twenty years later.
 

The latest storm was predicted before we had the one that was coming in a day or two. On Saturday or Sunday February 8th or 9th the weather forecasters were talking about a storm that eventually fizzled out to nothing and they said there were several storms behind it. This was the first behind that storm. School was cancelled early on Wednesday for Thursday. Friday school was cancelled early on Thursday, giving the girls off for midwinter recess eleven days. 

They will make it up during Easter week. The snow storm started in the middle of the night. I got up around 2am and there was just a dusting on the roads and it looked like this one was going to fizzle too. It picked up in intensity mid-morning and kept going, changing over to rain mid-afternoon then it stopped long enough to clear the driveway, then it started back up dropping a few more inches on top of what was there. The fun of this storm was the ice that was under the snow. It made it impossible to clear larger areas then before the storm. As You can see from the pictures and the video the girls were lots of help clearing the driveway and clearing the snow off cars.

  My Birthday was about two and a half weeks ago. My daughters got me a card with their mother's blessing. I love it.

Quitting

When we first got the Girls to America, I was afraid they would not get to do things. I don't mean things like going to the Bronx Zoo or going to the beach. I was afraid they would not join in and become part of their school. I never joined any clubs or became part of a team. I didn't exist in school.
  The first month Nastia was at the middle school I talked to her about joining things and I thought she was afraid, like I was and would not join anything. I told her to look on the bulletin boards to find out when clubs and sports would start and where. She then asked, what was a bulletin board.

Maggiano's at the River Side Sq. Mall

   I remember the day she came home and said she wanted to join the volleyball team. Before I even knew the words had left my mouth I had said she was too small to join. Me, the guy who kept telling them not to let anything stop them from being what they want to be in this world. I might of even said it twice. I was happy that she still tried out for volleyball. I admire them both for all the hard work they put in trying to learn all the things they have never experienced before.
  As it turns out I didn't have to worry about the Girls missing out on activities through the school. Volleyball was just the start. That year Elena joined the play Annie and it was the first time I witnessed her not trying. She was late joining the play and she would sit around talking to friends as if nothing important was going on. She did Karate with her sister to that year I think. She wanted to quit before the term she agreed to was over, we would not let her. She went to every class required, but quit trying a long time before it ended.

Snow storm just after this posting

  When they joined wrestling last year, she spent the whole time fooling around and talking. She never paid attention to the coach and she came within a few seconds of winning her final match.
  This year Nastia wanted to join bowling. I asked her sister if she wanted to go to. Nastia got all upset saying she wanted this to be her thing to do by herself. I could understand, but her sister had been asked and said yes and she had agreed not to fool around and be a distraction.
  Elena started the season the better bowler. Somewhere by the end of September she would just go up and chuck the ball down the lane. Not waiting for her ball, she would grab another one and as soon as the pins were set the ball would fly. She would turn around and walk away without looking.
  About a month ago she texts me from the bus home that she forgot it was bowling day and was headed home. Right away I knew what it was. I ordered her off the bus and on to the bus for bowling. She was smarter then that. Her didn't call until the bus had left the school. She then got the next two weeks off for Christmas vacation.
    In the middle of the today, I remember it is bowling Monday. Thinking they will forget I text them both. Of  course Elena replies to my text during school, which is not allowed saying OK, then she asks when can she quit bowling like she did Karate. I begin to write her back, then stop. This requires a face to face talk.
   At the bowling alley I call her over and we sit down in two chairs away from everyone else. I am unhappy she wants to quit bowling. Not because I enjoy bowling, but again she wants to quit something. I try to explain to her how if she is quitting things now life only gets tougher and she will not be able to quit things when she gets older. I told her if in the future she wants to have a baby and after to years the baby is not so much fun she can't just throw up her arms and say I quit. She has to finish things she starts and if in the future she is tired of her job and wants to quit, well then she doesn't get to eat.
  I told her she should take some pride in doing the best job she can and maybe that would make it a little easier to do. Work at it and maybe you might even get better at it.
   She is so much like me, I hate talking to myself.

Christmas Memories past and present

There is this cookie called a chocolate pinwheel. You need to find a cookie book from the nineteen-sixties called Betty Crocker Cooky book. In it are loads of cookie recipes. There is even a cookie that is just butter and chocolate. You take graham cracker crumbs top them with butter and chocolate. No wander there is an obesity crisis. I made it once, it was wonderful. In this cookie book is a recipe called Chocolate Pin wheels.

 It has nothing to do with Christmas, the three wise men didn't eat them as they crossed the dessert, and god didn't send them to the Israelites as they wandered through the dessert. But, I only make them at Christmas and only eat them before Christmas. Some how they have become my Christmas Cookie. I remember my mom making them during the holidays along with several other cookies with longer memories and others with better tastes. I love Chocolate Chip cookies better. I remember making roll out cookies when younger and I have eaten cookie press cookies for ever.
   The Classic Cooky Book by Betty Crocker was first printed in the early nineteen-sixties. On the inside cover my mom wrote the recipe for the roll out cookies that we would make for the first decade of our lives. The cookie press cookies were from the cookie press how to pamphlet.
  There is nothing better about these cookies then other cookies. It is just the memories that come flooding back as you make them. I can remember making cookies, all four of us, yes four kids, all self absorbed in their own lives and wanting to make cookies while their mother tried to keep all of us happy. And yes she did. The roll out cookies were simple. We were each given a blob of dough and some flour and cookie cutters, and oh yes, an empty cookies sheet. You would roll out the dough and use the cookie cutters to shape you treasures. They would be moved to the cookie sheet and lightly brushed with whipped egg white. Then some sprinkles and into the oven they would go. Seven minutes or so later out would come these paper thin or not delicious cookies that you had made.

Christmas trees and stars, rolled too thick become the delicious cookie blob

   Growing up my mom never did this with her family and just like reading to us at night when we were young, no one knows where these ideas came from. they have become family traditions, at least with me or at least I have tried to...
   This is where all that back story above becomes relevant. Yesterday, was Sunday. I had a list of things I wanted to do. Work on the attic, plaster the hall wall, add heat to Amanda's room and I also wanted to make memories with my daughters.
  Saturday, all day Elena and mostly Nastia spent the day playing on x-box live. I don't like them doing that, but I let them. I started making cookies around noon. I called Elena to make some roll out cookie dough. After she was done, we put it in the refrigerator to cool until I could find the cookie cutters. Next Nastia and I make roll out cookie dough and put it in the refrigerator to cool until I found the cookie cutters. I never found them, I must of given them back to my mom. I thought I had bought a box of them and that was why I gave them back. I must of given them back before the girls were even a thought figuring that I would never have a use for them. And I guess I never bought the cookie cutters for the same reason.

Elena being good for Christmas!!

  I searched the house top to bottom and never found them. I went on to other cookies and the girls went back to x-box and an afternoon of memories that I wanted never got too far off the ground.
  I want so much for our girls and there is not enough time to do it. I want memories of us doing things. I want them to remember the time I told them, as I rush up stairs that I heard Santa Claus and they better get to bed and the time I told them about the time I fell asleep in my chair in Nyack on Christmas eve and woke up to find Santa Claus in our house putting present under the tree. What I'm afraid of is they will remember all the times I yelled at them like a manic and said things that I didn't mean. The time is so short before they are completely out of our world and are more interested in their boyfriends and going out to Christmas parties and doing things with their friends then their parents.
   The cookie dough the girls made the other day, Teri insisted in making cookies tonight. Nastia helped, Elena wasn't interested. She watched TV. It is already starting to happen with her.
  It was fun sorta to make cookies. Teri started with Nastia, without me. I walk in and she is using two sheets of wax paper and a rolling pin to smooth the dough. It was a good idea except the dough would of stuck to the cookie cutters. I grabbed a corner of the dough, it was very sticky and I kept adding flour and the cutters would stick and Teri would offer a string of ideas and I'm thinking why is this dough sticking, it was never like this when I was a kid. So I kept adding more and more flour. Teri and Nastia started making the cookies thick and for some reason I knew you should not do that, but could not remember why. So I started making them thick too. It was easier and it worked. When them came out we had created the cookie blob and it was going to take over the world.

Christmas Houses 2013

My Mom started this tradition just a few years ago. This is another of those when we were young stories. When we were young my mom used to bake cookies with us. She would make roll out cookies that we would use cookie cutters then spread some egg white on and add sprinkles. There were also the cookie press ones. You would fill the cookie press, put in a shape, a camel, a Christmas tree, a reindeer and so on and out would come cookies shaped like it. Then the egg white and sprinkles.
  This all ended when a large group of people got together and tried to bake cookies. I thought it went well, my mom was not pleased.

  She came up with the idea of decorating cookie houses. I was not a big fan, it seemed like a lot of work for her and I didn't think people would go for it. I was wrong, it has become a big hit. This year their were twenty-five people at my mom's. Plus she did for the Rockland Center for the Arts about twelve and she gave six spare houses to her neighbor Greg, who will invite five of his sons friends over to do houses. And she had a small gathering of her friends over for some Adult house decorating.
   It Snowed the day before we were to do the houses and the roads got sloppy, but seemed to clear by the time we were to do houses. I thought people might stay away, they did not. Some arrived a little late and some, like Elena's friend Jessica arrived very late. Everyone grabbed a house. The variety this year was beyond all previous years.

Teri got to do an apartment house. The Girls got regular houses to do. Elena wanted a new house because corners of the roof kept breaking off. Both Girls did some nice houses.
   About two in the afternoon we ordered six pizzas and after clean up we all went home around six that night. And of course we were hungry before eight and made snacks before bed.  Lots of fun.

Christmas blues

I knew it was going to happen. I have felt it in my bones for years and it finally happened this past Sunday. The death of my Father's Christmas ornament. I don't know how old it was or even the history around it. I supplied that in my imagination when my mother gave it to me about a dozen years ago.

  The mythology I invented went something like this. It was bought by my grandfather in the nineteen-twenties, when he was happy with his wife and didn't drink too much. He had a job and life was pretty good.
   Or maybe it was an ornament off the tree at Uncle Willie's house, where my Dad stayed for a while during the depression and he took this box of ornaments from his house after his Uncle died in the late fifties to remind him of if not a great man a good man who was the rock of his family, who was always there when he was needed by his parents or by his nieces or nephews.
  I remember the ornaments hanging on our trees during the nineteen-sixties.

They would hang with the cheap plastic ornaments that I now treasure, the ones filled with all the Christmas memories of growing up waiting for my dad to come back off the route to open presents. Or the time I stood in the doorway of my room at two in the morning while CBS played a Christmas Carol over and over on the TV, my Dad asleep in the chair. Or the time, I was very young, Bonanza was still on, it was a Christmas Sunday and had gone to bed, but couldn't sleep. I came out to my mother sitting on the floor cleaning up, her asking the usual "Why are You up?", me crawling into her lap and telling her I felt bad that her and Daddy got nothing for Christmas, Her saying that they got enough and it was OK.
  These are the memories that were in that ornament, which will now be in the ornaments like the bird that has been on every tree as far back as I can remember, as well as the cheap plastic nineteen-sixties ornaments that I now love.
  I even have a collection of Hallmark ornaments that have memories of when I first moved out of my parents house after my Dad died and I lived up in Stony Point. Every

Hallmark ornament that has to do with Mickey or I love Lucy or the Wizard of Oz is filled with memories of Teri and I, when we lived in Nyack and life seemed easier, a little simpler. We weren't so old back then.
  Christmas is filled with so many memories, some like the girls first Christmas were magical. I have a video of it.
  I guess I will get over the death of the ornament. I even took pictures of it in case it were to happen. When it did it was just like I thought it would happen. Someone was anxious to put up decorations on the tree and it's hook caught the one that was being picked up, it went up just high enough to clear the box, that was sitting on the floor. I heard it shatter and even before I looked,

 I knew what had happened. I didn't get mad, I kind of just sagged and went to get the broom. Teri ever the one to take care of bad situations cleaned it up and I just got lost. I was told several times how sorry they were and I know they were. It was an accident, sad but true and it could of happened at anytime. It was just it's time to die. Just as it wasn't it's time when Teri's cat toppled the tree in Nyack. It survived while several of Teri's ornaments didn't. Again it was just it's time, just like it will all be our time someday.