We're all alright, We're all alright, We're all alright- from Surrender by Cheap Trick

Amanda's baby came home today. There was something going on in the lungs and they wanted to keep an eye on him. Hopefully it's in the past.

I went along with Teri to meet the newest member of the family and the baby's aunt and grandmother, very nice people. I was the only male there until Kenny, the father, not the son came home. I guess, if I felt like it I could make a joke about Kenny, the father, Kenny, the son and Kenny the holy ghost, or talk about how confusing it is when both Kenny jr and Kenny sr come home on the same day at almost the same time, but I don't feel very happy. Just before Teri and I left I noticed several bottles of 43 on the dining room table. I got a little angry at Elena. Two of the bottles were the vegan variety of 43 and I know Elena bought them.The bottle of regular 43 Sean and Nastia purchased I didn’t give two thoughts about. We leave. When we return, I walk in the back door (only guest come to the front door, at least that’s the way it used to be.) and I walk into the dinning room. I get a big friendly hello and hug from Nastia. I wasn’t happy, but she is 21+ so what can you do. I then notice about a third of the bottle of regular 43 is gone. I'm concerned, but I’m sure Nastia shared it with Sean and Elena. Except Elena went over to Matt’s and Sean had some vodka and soda near him. Nastia and Sean are going to order pizza. I say, I’ll go get it. Nastia wants to visit her friend at the pizza parlor. Teri and I say no. If you want to keep her as a friend don’t go. I think we convinced Sean to let me get the pizza. Nastia is asked to go up stairs and lay down for a little while. She insists she’s fine and she insists she is not tired. I force her upstairs and the last twenty feet I fireman carry her. You know, an arm around the thigh and the other holding onto her arm with your carry, I mean daughter (I still not feeling happy, so that joke, yes a small joke, just kind of slipped out.) across your back and into the bedroom and gently placed on her bed. The next time won’t be so nice. Sean is up with her. I go to oversee dinner, Teri and I are having leftover pork chop she made earlier in the week. I think after a little while I hear that she has left the house and is walking down to the pizza parlor. She has no phone and no money. So no pizza. I wasn’t going to let her go. I go out the door and from the porch I use mean daddy voice on her (yes I have one and the only person who hears it is Teri when we get into a fight. I’d call it mean Joe voice,but that doesn’t sound as, you know…cool.) I tell her she has no phone, no money and better get back here.Sean runs after her and is talking to her. I again yell in a normal voice she needs to come back or I’ll carry her back. She argues with him saying she wants to go visit her friend at the pizza parlor. I see he’s getting nowhere so right in front of our neighbors Mike’s house I grab her leg, pull her arm over my back and lift her up and start walking home. I’m 65, I quit doing this stuff long time ago, but I’m angry. So like I’m only 63 I carry her across my back, up the street, up the front stairs, UP THE STAIRS TO THE SECOND FLOOR, down the hallway, during the whole trip I’d like to check my pulse or at least stop to see if I’m having a heart attack. I’m puffing the whole way like an old steam locomotive. In her room I throw her on the bed. Told you it wouldn't be so nice. I take her shoes off and throw them down the stairs. I know that won’t stop her, but it will slow her down a little. She stays and Teri and Sean comes in and I believe I’m asked to go tend to dinner or maybe to just leave, I don’t remember. I do remember I’m in the kitchen cooking dinner when I hear her throwing up. It is not a time of triumph or I told you so. It just makes me sad. I never want either of them to feel pain, even necessary pain like a hangover or the dry heaves. She drank quickly and often. Teri and I were not gone long. With driving Nancy home,maybe an hour or a little over that. She, with maybe some help finished off a good third of the bottle. There was a time earlier in the evening when I told her she was acting like what I thought her Russian mother acted like. This got her angry. She yelled she is not like her, she doesn’t have a problem. It doesn’t matter. She needs to take her family genetics into account and to take it seriously just like I have for all of these years. And I will worry, just like my mom did for all of the years I seemed not to listen to her about it. I cooked an extra pork chop and we invite Sean to eat with us. He spends some time upstairs, relieving Teri of holding her hair back as she prays at the porcelain god. Sean finally gets her back to bed.At dinner Sean and I agree that if she’d gone to the pizza parlor, she’d have thrown up there and neither of them would have ever stepped foot in there again due to extreme embarrassment. Sean also say that Nastia has been off lately. When they went to Jessie’s, the one with the son, she was quiet. Jessie even commented. I, on the other hand, never seem to notice these things. Nastia, Elena and I played Super Mario Brothers all rainy afternoon and she seemed fine. She also drank on an empty stomach. She had an English muffin and some strawberries all day, bad idea. I go up to hold her hair back when she returns to the bathroom. At this point she is having the fun of the dry heaves. Your body wants to expel some more of the poisons in your body, but they are all in your bloodstream and your stomach is empty. So nothing comes up. There is the involuntary spasm, your throat is prepared for vomit. The mouth is open, the salivary glands are working causing your open mouth to drip and make you want to spit, which you do after it’s over. With all that preparation, nothing comes up. I guess it’s your body’s way of telling you to never do it again.And at that moment you're swearing you’ll never do it again. After I while of this I help her back to bed.During this whole time she is hyperventilating. I’m concerned. As she falls asleep her breathing returns to normal and I get scared because I can’t hear if she is breathing. I lean in close and she is breathing normally. Sean comes up and as I leave I ask him to check on her to make sure she is breathing. I wasn’t kidding. She scared me tonight. More than I ever want to be scared by her again. The two of them came to America for a reason. I may not ever know the reason, but it is not so one of them dies in a most useless manner as drinking too much. Monday comment- Here's the big kicker from Saturday night. Came Sunday morning when I went in to see how she is doing. I expect to see someone lying on their stomach with drool leaking from their open mouth groaning quietly, eyes vacent, wishing the hangover was done, suffering from a massive headache. I find her on her back, glasses on looking at her phone like nothing has happened the previous night. I on the other hand should not have carried her across my back. I’ve known for years I have two disks in my neck that are touching and when I use my shoulders for much of anything, like let's say carrying your drunk daughter back in the house, upstairs and throwing her on her bed that the next morning I’ll have a headache. So when I asked God not to make her suffer too much from being an overindulgent child, he interpreted that to mean I get the hangover. Fair play God! *Why do Irish people say fair play? This is a common Irish phrase that has transcended borders. It's the Irish way of saying “Well done.” If anyone has done even a remotely good job or achieved something, then the Irish praise comes in the form of “Fair play.” - Yes I'm being a little sarcastic.

We're meeting the possible future inlaws over dinner and a movie

It’s a warm day in mid May. It’s not air conditioning warm yet, but it's getting there. Last week Guardians of the Galaxy 3 opened up. The Muller side of the family gathered for a ‘Holy Communion for Mahew and the next day Billy and Alyssa’s engagement party. Guardians would have to wait. This week Amanda was due to give birth, maybe on mother’s day or if she held out, maybe her mother’s birthday. Someone got the bright idea to make seeing Guardians an event and invite the possible in-laws to see the movie. It was settled late in the week to have pizza at PrimaVera Pasta in the Dickman building near the railroad tracks, then to go to the 8:15 showing of the movie. Dinner went well, there were eight of us and we ordered three pies. We were a little light on pie, but who expected Sean’s skinny little sister to eat four slices. We sat around and talked, Teri and Sean’s mom doing most of it. Everyone tried to be involved and friendly. It went well. The movie started at 8:15 and ended around 11:00. It was a bit of a surprise how long it was. Everyone said good night and how they had a good time together. Nastia asked me a couple of times if I was looking forward to meeting Sean’s parents and everytime she asked I said, no. I’m not sure if she understood why. I guess it’s the meeting of people who might be in your life for the rest of our or their lives that makes it a big deal. When Teri and I introduced my mom tot Teri’s parents at a Mexican restaurant in Haverstraw around thirty years ago; each were going to be in each other’s lives for the next twenty odd years. Amanda gives

birth to a son 7lbs, some odd ounces Sunday night, Mother’s Day. Nastia who is dying to be around babies (“Not yet my own Daddy.” She says) offered to help out Amanda while she is in the hospital. She offers to stay at Amanda’s apartment down the street near St Paul’s church overnight. She and Sean go down to the apartment Sunday night to walk the dog and stay with the dog. They come back a little while later saying the dog has peed on the bed. I guess the dog is not happy being left alone for so long and let someone know. Sean and Nastia are not able to stay there because of that so they walk the dog and come home. Amanda should be back at her apartment today or Tuesday at the latest. The baby develops a breathing issue and stays at the hospital while Amanda comes home. KJ should be released by Friday. Teri is alway difficult when it comes to Mother’s Day. In past years I’d wanted to cook brunch over her protests. This year when I asked her what she wanted to do, she said she wanted nothing. That was what she was going to get, except Elena decided she wanted to take her mother out to breakfast for Mother’s Day at Pancakes Plus. I stay out of it. If she wants to do it, I’ll go. Amanda is in labor, so Nancy is at the hospital. Sean has gone home to spend some time with his mom. Elena pushed her mother to get ready to go out. Elena, who does not see the morning sun on her days off, is ready to go at 9:00. When I got up, I got dressed, so I am ready. Nastia somehow got ready. Sean left to have time with his mother on Mother’s Day. Nancy is at the hospital waiting for her first grandchild (feels weird saying it, writing it, even thinking it.) We drove over to Pancakes Plus, in Nanuet. Surprisingly the wait I predicted (over an hour and a half) is zero. We went in and sat down. All four of us order pancakes. Teri and I have craisins and walnuts, Nastia has chocolate chips and Elena strawberries, and blueberries. Nastia keeps stealing bacon from me and sausage from her mother. It is a nice time. I haven’t been out to breakfast in so long; I am shocked at the bill total. The girls split the cost. I leave the tip. I think it’s on the way home Elena starts talking about learning to drive a motorcycle again. Before that she talked about the new Nintendo Switch game console. I don’t remember how it transpired, but with Teri’s blessing I tell Elena if she’d give up the motorcycle forever I’d buy her a Nintendo Switch. She thinks about it and says, “No”. I countered with ten years and then lowered it twice more because she kept saying, “No”. I give her a final offer of waiting until she gets her other tattoos she is waiting for until she turns 26. After a few minutes of probably intense internal emotional debate she finally says,” yes”. Nastia then butts in saying, “I want a motorcycle too.” and she wants the same deal. This time it is my turn to say, “No”. At home I feel bad and Teri says I have to offer her something, she can’t get something for nothing. I go up to her room and tell her if she wants a Nintendo Switch, she has to go back to college part time for a year. I’m thinking she will get her degree. It’s her turn to say, “No”. I thought it was a great offer. I guess she didn’t. I feel very modern when I order the Nintendo Switch online for pickup in store. I put Elena’s name down so she can go and pick it up and I never leave the house. I also never see the switch. When Elena comes back the game goes to her room and if I want to see it I have to visit her room. What a racket! I hope I don’t regret doing this. I feel we’ve saved her life for the next five years. I hope when she turns twenty-six she’ll realize a motorcycle is too dangerous for this area and the Naruto anime she wants on her left arm is childish. Will some future person please look at her arms and let me know if the wait is worth it? on the motorcycle too please!

After parties last weekend, it's all happening at the Zoo.

The first or second good weekend, weather wise of the year was spent celebrating family events. The first event on Saturday, the holy communion of Mathew, started around one in the afternoon at Karl and Madeline’s house. I didn’t recognize Mathew. I’d not seen him in two plus years because of Covid and recently because of life being life. I hadn’t even met Luke; who’s now a cute two year old running around. The atmosphere at the party was something I’d hadn’t experienced since I was a little kid in the early sixties. There were little kids all over the place. Women who were going to give birth, who’d just given birth or just plain old families with several young kids.

When Billy, Denis, Cory, Ryan and Amanda were all young, it was different, they were all family. Saturday, I didn’t know any of the parents, so I guess they are friends of Kristen and Matts. I talked to Teri about this afterwards and she said we could be in the same situation as Karl and Madeline in the next few years. I guess we could, but the girls have a smaller circle of friends. I made a mistake and voiced my opinion when Karl, Eric and Lynn were talking about politics. After I said, “That anti-vaxing asshole?” I quickly got up and left until they decided to speak of something else. I should have stuck to the weather. As it was beginning to break up I asked for a family picture. I should have asked to add Kristen and her two kids. Nastia and Elena were not invited to the holy communion. Elena was working anyway. Nastia on the other hand, if she’d gone, she’d have had a grand time with all of those little kids there.

Sunday was Billy and Alyssia’s engagement party. It was over at Alyssia’s parents house on Continental Drive over past Van Houten Fields off of Sickletown Road. The day was warm and sunny. One of the first truly hot days of the year. We arrive around one in the afternoon and sit at a table with other members of the Muller family. The food is very good, the day warm enough that several times Nastia asks me if it would be okay for her to put her feet in this gorgeous place they have. I tell her each time she asks, “I’ll mistakenly push you in if you’d like.” She doesn’t go for it.

They even have an escape room. Nastia, Elena and Sean went to do it. I didn’t feel smart enough to do it, so I skipped. I guess I didn’t have to worry. Elena applied for her car inspectors license. They needed a copy of her high school diploma and she couldn’t find it. I looked in all of the ancestry stuff and it wasn’t there. I did find Nastia’s, mine, two of my cousin’s diplomas, but not her’s. She had to apply for a copy and it takes time and money. I know it’s in the house somewhere. Tuesday, the day before Nastia starts her new job, Sean and her go to the Bronx Zoo. It’s been several years since we’ve gone. Every so often the girls will go. Last time it was with Jessica’s family (not Jessie with the child) and her mother. On this trip it was just Sean and Nastia. They left early and spent a full day there. The weather was great and I forgot to ask her to send me a picture. I’ll do it now.

Wednesday, Nastia started her new job. She works with handicapped children in Piermont. It’s a simple trip to get there, but on the way back, if you're not familiar with the way they reconfigured 9W a few years ago, you can end up on the bridge going to Westchester or the Thruway going north, not as bad. And if you haven’t guessed, Nastia ended up going to Westchester. She calls Sean in a panic. Should I be hurt that she didn’t call me. I know he’s number one in her heart, but… you know…

He calms her down and texts Teri. I knew nothing about it until it is over and she is home. I would have thought it was funny and maybe asked her to visit a good chinese food restaurant over there to bring some home. She had an adventure and she got home safe. All and all something we’ll laugh about later. I feel like I’m talking about one of our dogs escaping. On Thursday, today Elena and Matt are going to the Zoo. It is going to be the warmest day of the week. She sent a picture to her mother and I without me even asking. How cool is that! I like to see pictures and see what they are doing.

Elena makes Pulled Pork, her parents go out to a movie and the Meat Song

Elena gave grief this week and last week about cooking dinner. She was down right nasty on Monday. I heard her and Nastia still up around 11:30 on Sunday night. Nastia is still unemployed, but Elena had work on Monday. After work, on Monday Elena takes a nap. I like taking naps and if done right you feel more alive or at least more willing to put up with people. She did it wrong, I guess. Dinner Monday was Spinach, raviolis, pesto and mozzarella cheese cooked in the oven. It was good. She is called by her mother to set the table for dinner. After a while, no Elena. Nastia sets the table and Teri calls Elena for dinner. I might have even called her on the phone too. Still no Elena. Teri is mad, me, I’m like, well, more food for us, her loss and if she’s not down when we’re finished, she can unpack it and warm her own dinner. Nastia is more concerned and yes tomorrow she’ll say she hates her sister too. But tonight she is concerned that her sister is not answering everyone’s call for dinner. Nastia goes upstairs and discovers Elena is asleep. We’ve all heard of ‘letting sleeping dogs lie’, well in our house you should ‘let sleeping Elena’s sleep’. She comes down and is as nasty and surly as she can be. She doesn't have a nice word for anyone. She is so bad that I try to avoid talking to her. At one point I ask her to go back to bed. She says,”Sure, no problem, thanks” and is not seen for the rest of the night. Nastia observes, “Well she must be getting her period.” True or not, it is for the best that she is gone back to bed. The funny thing is when she wants to be she can be as charming and funny as anyone, but that’s when she wants to. Tonight she didn’t want to, not at all. The next morning she will awake and it will be like her evil twin was visiting us the previous night. She’ll act like nothing happened and she’ll expect everyone else to act the same way. While Elena is catching up on her sleep, I ask Teri if she’d like to go see a movie called, ‘Somewhere in Queens’ with Ray Romano. It is a movie made on a small budget and it is only playing until Wednesday. I have the bowling dinner on Wednesday, so that leaves Tuesday. Now Elena is going to cook dinnerTuesday. Teri and I debate whether to tell her in advance or to tell her last minute like she does so often. Good parenting makes us tell her Tuesday morning. No one was going to talk to her Monday night. She puts dinner together in the crockpot for pulled pork. Teri turns it on for her about 10 AM and she’ll be home to shred it around 5:30- 6PM. As we are eating our food court dinner Teri thinks it might just be her for dinner. Suddenly we both feel guilty. Her sister and Sean do eat with her and she brings some over to Matt to have. She asks how much rice to make and later sends pictures of what she cooked. I sense some pride in her sending the pictures.The rice is a little lumpy, but it looks good. v

I love funny mistaken texts and Elena sent me one while cooking. I'm just sorry I missed the 'meat song'

After a good movie, we get home around 8:30. The three of them are in the living room playing Super Mario brothers having a good time. Except for the drain not cleaned and the clean crock pot left out, the kitchen is clean. Seems like everyone had a good night

Nastia rearranges her room, giving Elena ideas.

Nastia rearranges her room, giving Elena ideas. And more dinners. Nasia asked if I could take the extra bed in her room down. She sleeps in a queen size bed and the single bed next to hers has never inspired anyone to sleep in it. The last time Amanda was living in the house, she slept with Nastia, the same with Jessica.

A few months ago, Elena broke one of the posts on the bed in a small temper tantrum while playing XBox. Yes, neither Teri nor I heard about it. I had to ask Nastia who did it? I remember being that angry once. I did stupid things like that. I’m not proud of that time in my life. Elena has a lot of anger inside and yes Nastia, we do treat her differently than you, I’m sorry. I took the bed apart and everything except the box spring made a sharp turn in the hallway and fit up the narrow stairs to the attic. So the box spring and the mattress will go out on junk day. A TV set I won at Dave and Buster’s that plays VHS tapes also went upstairs. I wanted to know if the TV worked, of course I’d bought it upstairs first. I plugged it in. When TVs went digital all signals were converted away from what this TV could pick up, so it is only good to play VHS tapes. I played a tape that said family on it and it is a copy of the family reunion my mother planned in the summer of 1988. I watched a few minutes and I stopped when I got to a dozen people who were there who have died since. I’ll get it transferred to another form so it can be seen by everyone who wants to see it. I still need to find the original and return it to Harriet.

Nastia vacuumed the rug, we spun it to hide a worn corner of it. She requested, so we moved her bed against a wall. It turns out it’s up against the adjoining wall of Teri’s and my bedroom. Not that anything is going on, but the sense of privacy has disappeared. It’ll be moved soon. With the room all back together, Elena walks in fresh from work. She comments how she likes the way the room is set up and considers moving her room around to match having the bed against the wall. It does make the room feel larger.

Sunday dinner was going to be chicken marsala, but the mushrooms were bad. They went into the Lomi (A Lomi turns food waste into dirt in under 18 hours, it’s pretty cool. I have almost 5 gallons of dirt from using it.) We quickly pivot to chicken cutlets. I offer Elena the opportunity to cook with me to make up one of her delinquent meals she owes the house, she passes. I guess she doesn’t fear living on take out, Tacos and instant soup for the rest of her life when she moves out. Nastia comes in and asks if she can help. I let her because I’m tired from working outside for all of three hours. Boy it sucks getting old. I had trouble standing up. I cut the chicken and pound it flat. She flours, eggs and milks, then bread crumbs them. I cook the first half, she finishes. Dinner was good. Elena, what are you cooking this week? She is trying to make pulled pork. It’s easy and quick. A good week day meal.

Nastia makes Empanadas Elena puts off making dinner.

Nastia makes Empanadas Elena puts off making dinner. The fun seems to have left the girls when it comes to cooking. Both of them have said they don’t know what to cook. I can understand, so when they say that I try to get them to investigate options they might want to eat. When you don’t know what's out there you are limited. How can you imagine the vastness of choices when you don’t know what the variety is? It’s hard to explain, I’ve been where they are, so I feel I know. It comes from not being exposed to what is out there.

Coming up on 14 years this October, they have not been involved in what they have eaten very much. If they didn’t like what they were fed, they’d sort of eat it, but not notice it, if you know what I mean. Now that they have to cook their immediate reaction is to try to cook something they like, something usually easy. That’s OK, but they’ve gone through their list of likes and Teri and I want them to expand their repertoire.Add new things, try to cook things they have never had and most of the time these dishes will still have a list of familiar ingredients. Last week Nastia made stuffed shells and Elena made a dish with ground beef, peppers and cheese. Both were good and both were later used as leftovers on a later day (So Teri and I don’t have to cook, if we don’t want to) So far this week Nastia made Empanadas. It was her first attempt to make them and there were a few mistakes made. Both Teri and her are unemployed looking for jobs. During the afternoon both made the empanadas. Nastia went bowling in our league and Teri put the empanadas in the oven just before we came back. She left it up to Nastia to decide when they were cooked. Here is where the frame of reference comes in. I have burnt enough food that I have gotten pretty good at deciding when something is cooked, Nastia hasn’t. I was not involved in this and thought Teri had a handle on things. Nastia asked, “When are they cooked?” Teri said when they have browned. Now Nastia has no frame of reference for what is considered browned. I would have stopped at a light golden brown. Nastia took her mother's directions to mean ‘brown’, so she waited until they were ‘brown’. She made rice and two vegetables and called everyone to dinner. I didn’t take a picture of the empanadas, but suffice to say the color they came out of the oven was more along the lines of almost a chocolate brown. She asked everyone how they were and I was honest. They were over cooked. They still tasted pretty good. THe one problem that plagued the dinner was she made different ones for different tastes. Seans had no peppers in his. Nastia’s had no cheese and the rest had peppers and cheese. Teri and Nastia made marks in the different ones to tell them apart. The marks disappeared while they were cooking. During dinner empanadas were passed around as people found one they didn’t like. I ate whatever was put on my plate. Dinner was good.

I added an old picture of Nastia and a new picture of garden asparagus because I didn't take any picture during any of this. Elena has Thursdays off. She cooked last Thursday and cooked a beef dish with peppers and cheese, it was good. She has plans for this Thursday and has pushed off her cooking day to Friday. I have a feeling it’s going to be takeout for her night to cook. I don’t like letting this happen because when she is no longer the richest person in the house because she doesn’t spend much, she’ll need to know how to cook and won’t have the skills and if Teri and I are gone, she’ll be calling her sister asking how to make something. Elena would rather starve or eat instant soup.

It's Friday now and Elena has put off cooking dinner again. Yes we are letting her get away with it again, Nastia. She gets nasty and it's just not worth it. We treat each of you differently and I hope you will understand one day why. One day you and her will be sitting down together and she'll wonder why her meatballs don't taste like her mother's or how did dad cook something else. You'll know and you don't have to tell her if you don't want to. Your mother and I will be laughing from beyond the grave.

Well, they are sisters. They hate each other until they start looking out for each other. They go out drinking one night. They come home several hours later and Nastia is pretty drunk or maybe just acting it, I don’t know. She starts talking to me, eyes all wide and glassy. Elena comes up behind her, turns her around and walks her upstairs. Making sure she is safe and in bed. Sisters??!! Go figure, I think the next day Elena would have said she hated her sister if asked.

Easter 2023 Elena goes to Matt's for passover, the Mustang and bowling

Nasia and I hung out over the weekend. Sean had two Easter’s to go to. The first one Nastia accompanied him. It was held at Sean’s uncle's house. A very nice place, Nastia said. They both got back around 10:30 that evening. Sean slept over and left Sunday morning to go back to Orange County for his second Easter, I assume with his father. Sunday morning, I’m outside working on the screening for the blueberries (I’ll explain. I am putting up netting so the birds don’t eat the blueberries.) and she comes out to hang out with me. After a while I ask her why is she here and not with Sean? She says he left for his second Easter before she came out. Teri made ham, corn souffle, pineapple casserole, potatoes and some vegetables for dinner. She did everything except the carrots that Nancy bought over. Teri said dinner was going to be at 2 PM. It wasn’t even a Muller 2 PM either, it was almost exactly 2 when we sat down for dinner. There were five for dinner this Easter. Amanda couldn’t make it, Sean was in Orange County for dinner and Matt might have been working. I didn't take an Easter picture, so I used a picture of the asparagas growing in the garden.

I wanted to make dessert, but Teri asked me to let her make it and she made this stuff called fluff or something like that, it was good. Like I always do, I was planning to make a dessert, some rugelach. I’ve never made it, so why not make it on a holiday for dessert. What could go wrong. I’ll wait while you tick off all the things in the past that have gone wrong… I think that is enough. It would have come out great, maybe not in a timely fashion, but it would have been great. And yes it is more of a passover dessert, but, well you know, it’s good. I was even thinking of making hamantaschen. Yes, that is also more of a passover dessert. Ah, America that vast interwoven tapestry. My brother Eric and his family were a group of only four at Easter this year too, I believe, so maybe next year we should combine them. A few days before Easter on Thursday, Elena went to passover dinner with Matt and his mom. She didn’t say too much about the night, but she came back with some leftover Elena has gotten it into her head she wants to fix the Mustang. The Tuesday after Easter she brought home a battery for the car, the first step in getting it going. I really don’t know how that car has gotten so old. I just bought it yesterday (October 2000), or maybe it was last week, it was really recent.

I also hope she doesn’t view this like the bottle of 43 I bought one day. That bottle her and her sister finished off on me and they then went out and purchased a new bottle that mysteriously then became their’s. It's funny how that works. Last night, the third to last week of bowling, Nastia after bowling a 111 in the first game, starts the second game, with a strike, then she throws a second and then a third. After that she throws an open (8 pins) and I think it is all over. In the next three frames she throws three more strikes., then a spare. At that point you start to think it is possible for her to reach 200, which is the promised land for amateur bowlers. She opens in the ninth, leaving her with a 189, still a chance. For the last few frames I’ve noticed she is throwing the ball softer. I don’t want to say anything that might ruin the moment. Nastia never the superstitious one is talking about it asking if she gets this how many pins will she get. I really want to tell her it’s like in baseball. If you are pitching a no hitter, you don’t talk about it, it’s a jinx. Come the tenth frame, I throw out all superstition and tell her to go up and just throw the ball. Don’t think about it. She needs a mark plus pins to get 200+. Her last throw is a nine and she misses the ten pin. She ends up with a 198. I go to the front desk get her score announced. Coming back from the front desk I notice some wise has eleven strikes in a row. On his last throw he leaves the ten pin for a score of 299, amazing.

28 Years, Nastia's first casino and Elena wants to fix the Mustang

I can't believe it's been twenty-eight years since Teri and I married in The Tappan Reformed Church in Tappan, New York. It was an unusually warm April 1st, and yes I chose it on purpose so I would remember it. Teri asked me a year or so earlier when I wanted to marry her. I keep choosing odd days, like the second Tuesday of next week, February 29th, which wouldn’t happen for three years, I think. Finally I said April 1st. She replied, “If it’s a Saturday, We’re getting married on that day!”Well it was, so we did. This past April 1st was again a Saturday and the weather was almost as good as 28 years ago. We received a little rain late in the day, and it was almost as warm as it was in 1995. It was still cold in 95, running around getting pictures taken without jackets. We again went to ‘Michael’s on Main’ in New City. It was expensive, but we both had Rib Eye Steaks.

We were unsure about going out for our anniversary after I’d spent so much money on her birthday. I gave her lottery tickets as a gift and she won $100.00. See, sometimes you do win. And we used that money plus fifty more to go out to dinner. It was a nice evening.

Nastia and Sean talked about going to a casino in Monticello for her birthday last December. Her mother and I thought it was a bit quick to be going away for the night together. There were no illusions about stopping anything, it just seemed too quick. It’s like Sean sleeping in a separate bed when he stays over. There is no illusion that anything is stopped when they are alone. It just doesn’t seem proper to let him sleep in the same bed with her or even the same room.

So with all of that said, they went to Monticello and stayed at Resorts Casino near the racetrack. They left after Sean got out of work and they were up there about an hour and a half later. It's a nice looking casino. Nastia sent pictures and Teri joked about there being only one bed.

When I was a salesman and that was my territory, I don’t think the Resorts casino was built yet, so I have never been inside it. I’ve been to enough off the beaten track Casinos and even though the pictures Nastia took made it look nice, it’s not Vegas or even Atlantic City. She took pictures of the room and said they won $70.00, but spent some of it and left up only $30.00. They had fun and Nastia said she didn’t try to gamble, she just watched. Teri and I ruined the trip a little for her when she told us she gave her license to Sean to hold onto. We both told her that was not very adult of her to do. She fought us and we pushed back. She couldn’t see what was wrong with her giving her license to Sean and we couldn’t make her understand it was not very adult of her. She got angry and went upstairs. Later we invited her down to watch some TV with us and she did come down. Back in 2017 or maybe 2018, most likely 2017 I was driving my Mustang convertible home from work. It was a warm sunny day and I had the top down. I only drove it when the weather was good because the top had a hole in it. About half way home the car shifted to a lower gear and a light came on on the dash. I parked it.in the garage. I had the intention of fixing it, but money was tight and money remained tight, then I got the Grand Am because Teri swore the Mustang was no good in the snow because I once slid into a pole during a snowstorm. The poor car has gone through ups and downs. I ordered it during the summer of 1999. I picked it up near the end of October. We drove around the next week in the cool fall weather with the top down.

I think it was within ten days, Teri and I were driving down Rt 59 in Nanuet and we’d just gone under the Rt 304 bridge when I hit something in the road and got a flat tire. I had a new car temporary roadside service plan, that was how new the car was so I called and a neighbor, who runs a tow service, Chris came out to change the tire. I was a little embarrassed I called and it was someone who’d helped me out big time towing my truck when it was needed. The car went through other unfortunate times. The hole in the roof originally was in the folds of the roof near the bottom of the window. I’d get water in the car and not know where it was coming from. There were times the car sat for months, if not years covered in a tarp, or like it has recently in the garage for the last four years. Everytime it sat it was because I lacked the money to fix it. The roof has needed to be repaired for many years and that is because of money. Eric said four year ago he’d help me fix the transmission issue, but I needed a new roof first, so it sat until I couldn’t start it because of a new problem. Both of my daughters have eyed the car. I taught Nastia how to drive in it. It was sidelined when Elena was learning, so she has never driven it. It has around 67,000 miles on it. My car is suddenly 23 years old. When the hell did that happen? Parts will be difficult to come by like they are for the Grand Am which is also 23 years old, but has over 127,000 miles on it. Elena works on cars for a living. She doesn’t have the knowledge to fix the Mustang yet. We are starting very simply to fix the car. Elena took an Interstate battery I had and was able to get a new one from work because Sean, Nastia’s boyfriend, has connections with Interstate. When the battery goes in, next buy a module that is bad to replace it in the fuse box. If it starts, I don’t know where to go from there? I’ll figure it out. If I don’t one day the car will be gone and someone will be trying to fix it at her job.

Teri's Birthday- Again with the party

Teri has always held herself to a higher standard. She has always strived to achieve it and one day it will put her in an early grave if she lets it. So when it comes to her birthday I’ve tried to do something special for her. Sometimes I feel like that quote from Winnie the Pooh- “When you are a Bear of Very Little Brain, and you Think of Things, you find sometimes that a Thing which seemed very Thingish inside you is quite different when it gets out into the open and has other people looking at it.”

I threw a party for Teri last year at Maggiano’s in the Riverside Square Mall in Hackensack NJ. It was a great success, I felt. Teri had time to share with people she is close to. We had a good time. Money being tight this year, I figured I’d throw her a party, but switch it up and order food from the Mexican Restaurant down the street, Sangria. Teri loves Paella and it was a nice family style dinner that would get put on the table and people would just scoop what they wanted. But just that bear, that thinks of things which seem very thingish inside you… it is quite different when it gets into the open. I’m not saying it wasn’t fun, it was. THe food was good and everyone ate their fill and then some. It just seemed less thingish when it got out into the open.

Originally I tried to keep the circle of friends and relatives tight because of cost. I invited Kimmy, and Katie, her cousins. Sallyann, her best friend and her sister, Nancy. Later I thought it was unfair to exclude Sallyann’s family, so I asked Sallyann if she wanted to invite her daughter and Kenny, her husband. By the morning of the party it was a gathering of ten. Teri, who knows about the party, asks me, what am I serving and how I’m set the table? I hadn’t thought much about it and Teri being the intense go-getter that has brought us to where we are today, almost single handedly is not pleased. I didn’t understand, well if I put myself in her shoes I do understand why she would give more than a passing thought to how the table is set. While I’d give it less than a passing thought. To me it was simple: how many people, how many leaves in the table, find a table cloth, it’d work itself out. It’s like when I’d go up the Thruway in the left lane passing the entrance to Spring Valley needing to get to the Garden State entrance with two lanes of cars between me, it and I would work it out. I’d get there. It might be a little intense for a moment or two, but I’d get there. I alway do and mostly in one piece. Teri says she will pick up salad, if I want, I say, “Ok”.

Nastia offers to help. I put two leaves in the table joking with her when her mother saw it the first thing she’d say was, “It’s too big.”, you had to be there. We decide on the nice dishes and are leaning toward the ‘silver’ silverware, because someone lost four of the regular forks and we only have eight. It wouldn’t work with ten people coming. With the table set, I receive a text from Sallyann saying stomach virus can't come. So now we are down to eight and the regular silverware is going to be used. See everything works itself out. I remove a leaf from the table, fold the table cloth in on itself and everything is set. I visited Sangria’s the previous day and they said they didn’t do the family style paella like they did during Covid. I visited them with Nastia about two, the day of the part and was told to come back a little later. Nastia and I go to get cards, see that worked itself out too, while we waited to talk to someone about the order. At 3:30 or so we go back and they tell us they can give us the food in trays, but the price is still the price. I was disappointed. I pay and tell them we’ll pick it up at 6 PM. Back years ago, when Teri and I would go to El Bandido in Spring Valley, the owner would give away free things. They were never hugely expensive, but it was nice, made us feel a little special. One night we were given a shot each of 43. It is a vanilla liqueur, I guess from Mexico. It didn’t matter because then and there a love affair was born with it. For better or worse when my daughters were introduced to alcohol, I introduced them to 43. Mexican food and 43 go together like rice and beans. Or like Nastia and going out drinking. She’ll order 43 when she goes out to drink, if that wasn’t clear. It’s funny how that night at El Bandido has trickled down to Nastia going out drinking.

Well, all eight people show up. Some 43 is passed around. The food I picked up at six is kept warm while we eat salads. Teri wanted me to make a sauce for ice cream that I haven’t made in years. I dug the cook book out from the pile of cookbooks piled in milk cases because with the internet, who needs cookbooks. She wants me to wait to make it. I wait until after dinner. I met the butter in a large frying pan. Add the chopped walnuts and brown them. While this is going on I melt chocolate chips and heavy cream in a double boiler. Who says I can’t do two things at once? When the walnuts are browned, I add the Grand Marnique, tilt the pan to the flame and flambé! LThat night the flame reached the top of the exhaust hood and burned for a good ten seconds. It was fun and a little scary. Something you can drink burns like that! I combine the chocolate and the nuts and it gets scooped over ice cream. It was a perfect way to end the evening. After cleanup, Teri comes over to me. She tells me how she enjoyed people coming together, but she didn’t like people giving her gifts, she called it mining for gifts. I understand and I wanted to tell people not to bring gifts, but I thought Teri would find that tacky. She asked for no more birthday parties. So next year it will not be billed as a birthday party, just a gathering of Laudecker’s.

Merry Christmas Elena

Elena is supposed to cook once a week, just like her sister. Friday, today is St. Patrick’s day, so we are having Corned Beef and Cabbage. Is that racist behavior on our part? I know I’m 3/8th or so Irish and Teri believe it or not is about the same, so can we still eat this ethnic meal on this ethnic day?

Give me a moment to get the train back on the tracks…. OK, Elena cooking is the topic. Well Sunday Nastia and I made scampi, Monday, we had leftovers, Elena didn’t cook. Wednesday she was spending with Matt. Shwas spending it with him to the point she slept over his house. How was grandma’s bed, Elena? Wink, wink, nudge, nudge (Monty Python reference) Getting off the tracks again. I really don’t care if she sleeps in Grandma’s bed or not, she was the one who bought it up originally. Nastia has been allowed to go away with boyfriends, so why shouldn't Elena go away with her’s? Even if it’s just to Northeastern New City. (Where Matt lives)

I think we’re up to Thursday now. Well Thursday evening she was supposed to come home and help to put St. Patrick’s ethnic meal together with her mother. Elena doesn’t get home until late that evening.(Don’t worry, there were no hickies, or should I worry?). So about 2 PM she texts, "What's for Dinner” Teri replies, “What are you cooking?” “Idk, I have nothing” is her reply. She quickly adds another text, “Matt wants me over for dinner. If you want I can do 2 dinners next week”

Teri, “ Idk, whaddya think dad??” I finally jump in with, “ So the rest of us starve” For good measure I add two emojis, which I never do. Elena, “You’ll be okay” Can you stand all that sympathy? She then adds, “You got something in the mecroavay too.” That unknown word will get clear. Teri alway one to jump when she smells a little blood in the water, “The what???????”. Elena, “The microwave” I guess the first time she spelled it in Russian. Teri feeling her oats, “Oh and look dad figured out how to use emoji’s” I’m impressed she could spell emoji’s, I had to look it up. Elena jumps on the bandwagon, Wow. That’s crazed” she then realizes she texted ghetto and added Crazy* I add a picture of my finger, Elena replies, “Awe” and “ I’m your number one fan” Teri not wanting to be left out, “You hug your mom with that hand?” Elena, always willing to one up you, adds two fingers in her photo and says, “Guess what pops You’re my number 2 fan”. I tell her that will be our Christmas card and send her a picture with Christmas designs around it. Telling her

I just got it back from the printers. Thinking I might have gone too far, I say, “Have I gone too far,I’m sorry if I have.” She tells me no so I go into it would make a fine Easter Card too with little bunnies and a Jesus in the corner. Teri, having gone back to work cuts in, “People are working yet.” I throw a couple more emojis at her and Elena, “That’s okay ma this is more of an important matter.” Life without the girls would have made us richer monetary wise, but life would have been so boring

Once again that feeling of, "I have to get there as soon as I can."

I'll never be able to relax when Nastia goes out driving, well at least for the next twenty years, I won’t. She has had so many accidents, it's hard to believe. Teri counted them off to me on her fingers recently. She started on her left hand and I think she finished on her right. She hit a car pulling out of a parking spot in the bowling Alley. She hit the bowling alley building. In Pearl River when she was driving her sister's Taurus she rear ends the car in front of her. She put her car into gear on a steep hill with the car off and crashes into another car, shattering the back window on the Escape. She crashes into a guard rail when a bee gets into her car, that's more than three. I know there are more, but I'm just hi-lighting here. We can add another one to the list, if you haven't guessed.

I get out of work at 4:45 to go bowling in New City on Wednesdays. I am driving up the Palisades towards New City when I get a call from Nastia. I answer it and she is upset saying she's gotten into an accident. I tell her, "I'm on the way" and Hang up. I get into the left lane and start driving faster. That old familiar feeling has returned. That feeling that I needed to be at her side two minutes ago. Of course the car in front of me doesn't know I'm in a hurry, so they don't get out of my way. A small voice in the back of my head keeps saying, "If you get into an accident that will help no one." So I slow down and I try to calculate my route to get where she is as quickly as possible. For many years I delivered milk up in the area and I knew the back roads very well then. It's been over twenty years since I've taken some of the roads. I guess and try hard to remember how to go. I'm stressed and of course that makes it harder to think. I make a left onto Central Avenue from Route 202. I turn onto Railroad avenue. My gps is sending me to another bank, but I recognize the road. Foley’s, a bar? Restaurant used to be on this road. I go up and down the other side of a tall hill and the Key bank is on the left. I pull in and it takes me a minute to find her car and her. I wrap her in my arms. I knew she was alright back when I got the call, but it made it so much better to see her and just confirm it. And Mom and Dad, I’m sorry for all the anguish and fear I put you two through when I was younger and stupid and drove like a fool after drinking.

I try to get Steve’s auto body, but it’s after 5 PM. I tell the officer to get anyone. Sean arrives a few minutes later and I tell him what I’ve done. He says, “No, he’s got a guy” and he believes he can fix the car at his Dad’s shop for very cheap. He calls his guy, leaves the keys and we leave to go bowling. I was going to call it off, but Nastia looked at me and said there was no reason to call it off. We got there late. The other team had started. The Management put us on our own lanes and we were able to bowl and be by ourselves. Somewhere in the evening Nastia began to smile again. During the second game she complained about aches and pains and bowlled a 79 to prove she hurt. Everyone survived this day and even the cars were not hurt too badly. Her car will be laid up for a while. Parts must be found and then installed. Until then Teri and I and yes Sean will be carting her to and from work. Such is life. It could have been so much worse.

Playing House

It's interesting watching Nastia and Sean 'play house'. I don't mean to make that sound mean. Last night (2/27/2023) it snowed. It is the first measurable snowstorm of the year on the last day of February (2/28/23). Everyone is out of practice and unprepared. I did get Bruce, a family friend, to fix the snow blower, so at least that was ready for the storm. I even started it yesterday to make sure it still worked, it did. Overnight it snowed about 4-5 inches, and was over by the time I got up. Couldn’t even watch it fall. I’m up at 6 to let the dogs out with Teri. I shovel the back steps, the walkway and I make a path for the dogs because they’re old. About seven I wake Nastia up telling her she’ll need to clear the snow off her car. She groans and mumbles something along the lines of She’s making Sean breakfast. I leave her, message has been delivered. About ten after seven, she is up and she is making Sean frozen waffles. Sean is clearing off the cars. I walk past the breakfast table and see two sets of waffles on plates, but no one is eating. I hear Nastia outside and I wonder how they will enjoy their cold waffles. It’s Tuesday, so I leave the front porch covered in snow. I’m at the point where I feel that it is time for someone else to shovel snow. Later in the day, Elena will shovel the steps. I’ll clean the snow off Teri’s car and my car, maybe the girls cars, if there is time. Today with this great new job with the early end time, anything happening early in the morning, I don’t have time for it. I even leave the snow blower plugged in for the electric starter ready incase Elena figures she wants to try and use it. She doesn’t and I’m not unhappy about that. It’s a big machine and I can just imagine her putting her hand in the chute after it clogs with wet slushy snow and her fingers get shortened when she touches the auger while it’s moving. Everyone thinks it won’t happen to them.

That afternoon I text Elena and ask her if she knows what she is going to cook this week. She has not idea because she doesn’t have a grasp on what varieties are out there. I text her and ask her if she wants to make Yankee Tower Meatloaf. She texts back, “Is that the one with the cheeeeesseeee” I answer yes. She wants to make it.

We start at about six. Teri is not feeling good so she comes home early. I have one way to teach and do things, Teri’s is exactly the opposite, from my view point anyway. Teri tells her to use this small cup with ounces on the side for the 6 ounces of milk. I’m on the other side of Elena saying, “six ounces is ¾ of a cup, just use that. Elena uses the small cup for the liquid and the ¾ cup for the bread crumbs. Somewhere the meatloaf gets too much milk or too little breadcrumbs because it spreads when it cooks. It still tastes fine. Elena makes macaroni and cheese and a couple vegetables and dinner is ready. She comments later that making the meatloaf was so easy. I was happy about that.

Saturday we had to put Bandi down. He is blind, he can’t always walk up and down stairs and he has become senile. Most mornings this last month or so I’d carry him down in a plastic container, turn it on it’s side pointing toward the wall of the stairs so he has a straight shot to the back door. After the first few times he’d begun to understand where he was and how to get where he needed to be, then it seemed to change and he’d get lost. I’d have to stand behind him and he’d play bumper car with my feet until he went in the direction he needed to go. Teri had said several times maybe it was time. I’d resisted hoping he’d die one night and save us the decision. We called the vet on Saturday morning and we’re told to bring him in around 11:30. It went like the other dogs in the past and he will be cremated and buried at Teri’s mom’s grave somewhere. He was 17 when he died, we’d had him for 15 years.

It's winter, all we do is eat, I guess.

The next morning, after the Super Bowl the refrigerator seems so full of food and for a moment I think it is a leftovers night. Here is the pasta dish Elena made last week but we'll cook that on Tuesday, not tonight. As I go through the leftovers I see the chop meat I need to break up and freeze. It brings to mind Teri saying she’d have to make a Yankee Tower meatloaf because of all the American cheese we have. I text her later in the day to see if that will go over well. It goes over like my cinnabon invitation on Valentine’s Day the following day (I’m sorry, not tonight, I’m tired, which almost sounds like I'm asking for something else.) Later Teri will suggest Koltetta, that lovely Russian type meatball (Damn Putin, he’s poisoned everything Russian for me, except the girls) I think it’s a good idea and I know we have everything. This is a trick the girls must learn when they cook. (more on that later) Kotleta is simple. Meat, bread soaked in milk, onion, maybe some garlic. Well whatever it is, it’s simple. I put it together in a short period of time. It is so short that when I’m just starting Nastia says she’ll help, but wants to shower first. By the time she is back, I’m done, cooked, everything.

I tell Nastia to get Pierogies and we’ll fry them. She offers to fry them and as usual it is a long distance relationship. She puts one in the oil, the ice melts into the oil,it sputters, spits and in its anger and rage looks for someone to burn. Nastia by that time is in the living room saying I should call her when it is done being angry because she will not put up with that. Teri gets home, sees all the oil on the stove and well, would you be pleased with the mess either? Nastia warms the vegetables and it’s dinner time. Elena is over Matt’s house. She’ll sleep over (mom, I’m 21 years old and I’ll sleep in his grandmother’s old bed, two points for originality, and two points for audacity and a point lost for denying something your parent’s know has been happening for a while and do understand.) She has Tuesday, Valentine’s day off and Matt will make her breakfast (Elena, “how does he not break the omelet?”). They’ll get wings from Rick’s Club American and eat leftover salmon for dinner. She’ll come home a little late Tuesday after trying to get permission to go to a 10 PM movie and be home after midnight and have to go to work the next day. She’ll be happy, relaxed and in a generally good mood. I envied her that night. Nastia gave Sean a cold over the weekend for an early Valentine's Day gift and she’ll spend it with us. Well back in August when she didn’t have a date for Valentines day, she did ask if she could spend it with us.

The night of the Super Bowl

After the hike, Sean and Nastia go to the grocery, where Sean goes full Italian and buys a bunch of food. Teri has already purchased enough food for an army, so with Sean’s purchases we will be eating Super Bowl food for a week. He buys chips and cookies and dips. Teri’s plan for food was sliced roast beef sandwiches, shrimp with horseradish sauce Wings, pigs in a blanket with chips and dips. I know why Teri likes Sean, they think alike, both are chips and dips fans.

Teri as usual prepares 90% of the food. I’ve been working in Elena's closet (yes, that room still) and I have a headache and decide to shower. After I’m finished I’m asked to do the pigs in a blanket in the air fryer and to do the wings. Years ago Teri showed me how to do wings and I thought I remembered how to do them. I cook them in butter and add hot sauce. Something happens and the hot sauce is nowhere to be found. I must have cooked it off. They taste good, but are not spicy. The game starts, it’s a good game. Everyone is sitting in the living room watching the game. Nastia and Elena are rooting for Philadelphia and the rest of us Kansas City. Matt, I think is not som much into football. THe girls enjoy the first half as Philadelphia dominates and would be way ahead if it were not for the fumble KC’s defense to in for a touchdown. In the second half Philadelphia’s lead dwindles and Elena and Matt go upstairs. Nastia gets quiet.

I’m in a pool and get the reverse for a quarter, but there is no payoff for that. At the end of the game, I look at my numbers and all I need is Philadelphia to score a touchdown and then Kansas City to do the same. It’s the fourth quarter, plenty of time for it to happen. Philadelphia scores a touchdown, tying the game. I have their number. Kansas City marches down the field and with about a minute and a half left, a player catches a short pass and is in the open. There is no one to stop him. He heads for the left corner of the end zone. At the one yard line I hear the announcer say, “ he needs to stop, there’s too much time left”, and just like that the player slides short of the goal by a foot. I’m thinking they’ll run some time off the clock, then go for the score. Well they sort of do that. The next two plays the quarterback takes a knee and then they go for the field goal. I don’t win my $700.00. Some other person on some other couch celebrates winning an unexpected $700.00 this night. They rejoice in their unexpected good luck or with my luck, the were asleep when it happened.. Everyone leaves to go somewhere else. Sean is staying the night again, so he goes upstairs with Nastia. Elena hangs out with Matt until he leaves around 11. It was a good game and a fun night.

Super Bowel Sunday Morning and more food, oh, boy.

Super Bowl Sunday Morning Saturday night Teri and I, with Nancy go see 80 for Brady. I guess to prepare for Super Bowl Sunday. It wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. After work, Sean and Elena come in the door, Sean is carrying a bottle of Grey Goose vodka. It’s an expensive vodka. The girls with Sean go out drinking to the Last Chance Saloon. Before they go out they play a drinking game called buzzed with the Grey Goose. I’ll find the bottle (40 proof) three quarters dead later that night. Sean is staying over Saturday night. So when we get home, I let everyone know that Sunday morning I will go get bagels.I get up early on Sunday, about 8:40, because they are planning on a hike around Rockland Lake for 10AM. I leave messages when I return and receive no reply. Well, it is early, 9:14. At 10AM, the beasts begin to stir. I guess there is a possibility that they are still going out for their hike. I feel a little cheated that no one has or will admit to a hangover. They come down, still planning their hike. They tuck-in (INFORMAL•BRITISH eat food heartily."today's a special occasion, so tuck in" ) to the bagels. I bought extra and realized it might be a mistake when Nastia said,”These bagels are huge, I don’t know if I can eat a whole bagel.” At the table Nastia asks me ,”Why hasn't she ever woken up with a hangover?” I reply, in my best wise ass, “Maybe you haven’t tried hard enough.” I hope I won’t regret it later.

Talk revolves around hangover cures, drink water before bed, and slowly morph into why Matt isn’t coming on the hike and after he is contacted, why he can’t make it. And yes, I’m writing this as it happens…Elena gives a small clap and a yeah. Nastia leans over to Elena’s phone and it turns out Matt is going to make the hike. They then drift into proper hiking shoes. Nastia telling Sean sneakers are not good and she is going to wear snow boots. I do a virtual eye roll and try to keep my mouth shut., but don’t manage. Talk quickly shifts to Elena and her Timberland work shoes; she doesn’t want to be bothered buying online because they are difficult to return. Nastia burps for a second time. I point out to her that early in relationships your partner finds everything you do charming and wonderful. It then morphs in, oh, that’s what she does and eventually it becomes, oh, she has no manners, the pig. Nastia asks Sean what he thinks. He’s at the point of, it’s what she does. Nastia notices I am writing and asks what I’m writing. I read some to her. To prove a point, which I am totally at a loss for, Nastia bites Seans nose. Elena growls and they both do their evil deep voices (yes, you have to be there to appreciate it) I read that back to them, they laugh and Sean doesn’t appreciate the evil voices. Nastia tells Elena to go get ready for the hike and comb her hair, says,”Elena, comb your hair, you got hat hair.” Elena replies, “No I have bed hair. And I’m not going to comb it anyway, I’ll wear a hat.” or words to that effect. They debate for a moment or two which she has until she goes upstairs to not comb her hair. Sean and Nastia clean up and go into the kitchen where it gets quiet and some whispering goes on. Oh, please go on your hike already!! Matt arrives and Elena actually shows public affection and hugs and kisses him. Will wonders never cease.

Getting uninvited to dinner

Thursday night Elena texts, " Do we have frozen beef?" Teri asks why. Elena replies, "Matt is coming over and I'm making tacos." Now from that you'd assume and you know what they say about assume... that she was making dinner for everyone considering that I do most every night.

Teri comments that if she’s cooking maybe we will stay home. I comment she should prepare for tacos tonight by taking the meat out of the freezer and to take out four pounds. I still think I’m eating tacos on Friday.

Earlier in the night I stumbled over going out to dinner on Friday with Teri. We talk about it and afterwards we are eating at home. No problem, it’s tacos. Elena asks me, in her own unique way, to take the meat out of the freezer. I take four pounds out of the freezer. I still think I’m eating tacos Friday.

The next morning I’m eating breakfast when Nastia comes down. She, I think, brings up tacos or going out to dinner. I tell her I’m staying home and Elena is making tacos, you know, I’m eating tacos, Friday for dinner. She say, to my surprise, “ My sister wants to make dinner for Matt and Sean and I are going out. She wants you two to go out too.” I say, “She didn’t say that.” and I pull out the texts she and I and her mother were writing last night. Stuffed away at the top of one page is a line from Elena, “Nahh, you guys stay out. Immma make dinner for matato” and then a question about 4 lbs of meat. I missed the message and only saw Why 4lbs, which I answered as if I was eating tacos Friday night, but I wasn’t invited to have tacos for dinner on Friday night.

I texted my wife and we re-established our plans for dinner on Friday. A BBQ joint in New City. I’m not having tacos for dinner Friday night, I’m having BBQ. Elena is cooking dinner for Matt all by herself. Meanwhile later Friday, sometime in the afternoon I get a text from Elena, “How many taco seasonings am I using for 4lbs of meat. My reply will not fit the screen as the subsequent messages on how to make taco meat with the seasoning mix. You’d think I like to type with the length of my replies, And you’d think I was having tacos Friday night, no BBQ. Elena will be completely on her own making a dish that isn't really hard to make, if you have cooked on your own before, you know flying solo. She should do fine. She’s eaten it many times and seen it made several. I bet she wishes she’d spent less time in her room while I make dinner.Your right, no she wouldn't.

Teri and I go out to the new Bailey’s place in New City. We came back several hours later to a spotless kitchen. Matt is nowhere to be found. I ask Elena later on how things went and she gives a very detailed, “fine.” I haven’t seen Matt since that night, so until I do I’ll reserve judgment as to how it went. If he comes over and is dead, I’ll know it didn’t go as well as she said it did. Nastia and Sean went out to dinner too, but I never found out where they went.