Cabaret at RCC

Several Days ago Nastia asked me to go with her to see Cabaret at RCC for one of her classes. It started at 8PM and I didn't like her to be alone at night there, so I agreed. On the Day of the play, a Saturday, I am told Teri and her sister will be joining us. The Plan is to get dinner around 6 PM at the Airmont Diner, then go see the play. 
      Everything goes smooth and we get to the play a little early, before the doors open. Ticket prices for guests are $15.00 for adults, $12.00 for students and seniors. For the first time ever I am glad I'm over 60 and gladly accept Teri's and my senior discount.
      Nastia, because of her eyes needs to sit down close to the stage. The Theater is not crowded at this early time so we get third row off to the left a little. We could have gone first row center, if we'd wanted to. The theater does get fuller later before the curtain goes up.
      When the curtain goes up, the play does not resemble the movie in the least, as far as I remember it. The Play is not as light hearted as I remember the movie. It is more poignant, the characters, like Mr Schmidt and Miss Schneider are not in the movie to my memory. The Emcee, played by Joel Gray in the movie and well played by a student in the RCC play seemed to be in most every scene. His over the top performance was very good.
      Nastia need to write an opinion paper for her Voice And Speech class, She worked on it Sunday. After a little editing from me, Teri went through it and corrected my corrections and below is the result. Both of us tried to keep Nastia's voice in the paper.

 Anastasia Muller Muller 1

Voice And Speech

4/28/19

Ms. Schaudel

My opinion about Cabaret

The night of the play my family and I went to get dinner before going to the school. After dinner we go to the school a little early so we had to wait till the show started. I was not that excited because I did not think that the play was going to be fun to watch. Little did I know that it was going to be an amazing performance. As we got in the theater it was crowded. We made our way to the lower seats so I can see the play. The play was called Cabaret and it was about a time after World War One and  before Hitler got to power. As the play started this guy with face paint came out and started singing and I thought he was really funny. Throughout the whole play he made almost everyone laugh. As the play went on I liked a lot of the characters in the play, like Sally Bowles and Clifford Bradshaw. I think they were a cute couple. I also really liked the girls who played sexy women in the Kit Kat Club they were really good at dancing and had awesome clothes. In the beginning I liked the guy who became friends with Cliff on the train until I saw he was a nazi. The actor who played him was really good.

I really enjoyed watching the scene with the pineapple that was really funny. The Emcee really got me laughing with what he was doing with it.  I also really loved when the Emcee was dancing with the Gorilla it was really funny. I think that people should not be judged for who they are or how they look like because in the end they are still human. I really was sad when Sally got rid of the baby because I thought that she and Cliff would be such a cute family. I do understand why she did it though, she wanted her baby to grow up in a nice peaceful world and if she had the child at that time the baby would not grow up happy at all. I really liked the part where Cliff met up with Bobby at the nightclub, I thought it was funny and kind of sweet.  

       My favorite part of the play was when Sally was singing the song ‘Don't Tell my Mother’. I thought that was a very good song I really liked it. I also thought that the girls who were dancing in the back were really good as well. I thought everything was perfect the lights were on point and the actors were really good. I could tell that they worked really hard at it and at the end all their hard work paid off. I had two friends in the show that killed it. I'm proud of them. I also thought that everyone who sang were fantastic and they could work on Broadway.       

      The part that was really sad was that at the end of the play. The Emcee was wearing clothes the Nazis forced  Jews to wear in the concentration camps. I really did not like that because it makes me really mad that someone can do something horrible like that to people who are different from them. I really liked how we got a ten minute break to stand up and stretch our legs, use the restroom and  just get a little snack. In the end, my family and I really enjoyed the play. I'm really happy that I got to spend time with my family by taking them to see it. I almost forgot the band. I thought they were great and got the music right on point. They also had really good beat to the music which I really liked because I like music when it has a really awesome beat to it. After the play all of the crew got on stage and bowed and everyone in the crowd were going crazy because the crew blew it away with their performance.  My Dad said that the show was way better than the movie. I never saw the movie but I believe it.

Helen Hayes Hospital's interesting programs

      I took yesterday Thursday, April 25th off to take Elena to Helen Hayes Hospital. The last time I was at Helen Hayes was in the 1980's after my Aunt Emilie had her stroke. I thought Helen Hayes was just a rehabilitation hospital for stroke victims and such. It turns out it is so much more.
      I really didn't even know why the two of Us were going there. Somehow I got the story that she was going to take tests to find her interests, it was not. The Appointment had been set up by her Access VR counselor Ms. Titer in a meeting I didn't go to. I think neither Teri or I were there.
      The Meeting was set for 9 AM, scheduled to run for about two hours.It gave me a good reason to take a day off. I get Elena up around 8 AM and we're out of the house by 8:30.  We take a quiet ride up 9W talking a little about where We are and other time, like her road test when We were in the area. I mention a gas station where the gas is cheap, so it was an unimportant conversation, but nice. We don't talk too much any more, I miss it.
      We roll into Helen Hayes Hospital up the big sloping driveway and find a parking spot. It is a beautiful campus. Everything is well cared for. Inside the buildings are equally beautiful. We check in at the desk and proceed down a hallway to an elevator and go down a floor to Prosthetics and Rehabilitation. Elena's had some experiences in hospitals lately, that I have not written about, that she is not pleased to be in this one. We check in and it turns out our appointment is for 9:30, so we are early by 35 minutes.
      After a while out Doctor comes out. His name is Marco Riccotoni, He is a very nice guy. He stylish hair cut makes me wish I was younger and had hair to I could get one. It's long on the top and buzz cut on the sides, with a beard. I don't like beards but it look good. It's a version of the hair cuts worn in the late 1920's and 30's. 
       The Doctor is testing Elena for issues with her studies and improving her abilities to do papers. He asks about her laptop and other electronic devices to get an idea if she needs to upgrade them. He tests her vision, asking her to look at his nose and when can she see a pen move around her face. When does the same pen go double moving toward her face and become a single moving away. He tracks her eye movement across a page saying there is delayed eye movement, which can be corrected or at least compensated for. He shows her several web sites for free that give her access to books online. The Text can be enlarged and it can used as an audiobook and read to her. A second Web site has text books on it.
      The Doctor also had her do timed writing. He said it was good enough writing for note taking, but it was not good enough for papers handed in. She was then tested on her typing skills. I guess in this day and age when everyone types, I should not have been surprised at her fluid movement on the keyboard and her ability to type twenty-nine words a minute. It's not a professional speed, but she is aiming for higher. 
      The hour and a half was interesting and if Elena uses the information can help her do better in her time at College.

More Life...

I was flipping through previous posts, it's one of the reasons I like doing this. In previous Posts I get a snapshot of life and get to read about what is happening on a day or two in the life of the four of us, it's nice.
      Well in a post from October 4, 201- I read about how life for the four, five if you count Amanda is going. Life now is a little different. Now I get up as soon as Teri's alarm goes off. I go in and get the girls up. I started that to get the girls out of bed a little earlier. Well now they get woken up earlier, but instead of getting up earlier, they lie in bed awake or almost awake until they decide to get out of bed at around the same time they would have if I had woken them up a little later.
      Toaster Waffles are out of fashion now. The in breakfast is Belvita breakfast sandwiches. Nastia eats chocolate ones. Elena today had pancake bread. It's a bread that tastes like pancakes. When that is gone she will switch back to you guessed it, toaster waffles.
       Both of the Girls leave sometime before seven AM. Elena doesn't pick Arianna up any longer. They had a fight when Arianna told someone they should kill themself. They talk in school, I'm told, but don't seem as close as before. Elena's big friend is Jasmine. I have met her and she seems nice, it's just that there is something about her I don't like. Elena started having problems in school around the time they became friends. Maybe no connection, I don't know.
      One Day I told Elena she should ask Jasmine if she would like to go to the movies with her and Elena said Jasmine doesn't like movies. My first reaction to that was who doesn't like movies? The  second is who doesn't like movies? I have a friend who dated a girl in the 80's  who didn't like the Beatles. Back then everybody liked them. This Girl said it to stand alone and as a way to get attention, I felt. I think Jasmine is the same or maybe she doesn't like crowds or paying $14.00 for a ticket. I don't know, it just makes her seem weird.
      Nastia just about 7AM leaves for school. She goes to pick up her friend Vanessa. Vanessa is a nice girl and has invited Nastia to several of her church related functions. I was suspicious when it started because I thought they were trying to recruit her like the Jehovah witnesses. I find it distasteful when people come around trying to get you to join their religion. It shows disrespect for their religion. Anyway, Vanessa invited her to an activity night at the church, then a weekend at a camp upstate about two hours away. She went this past weekend and they didn't make her drink the Kool Aid (Look it up under Jim Jones, a very low point of the 70's for America) she had fun, she got hit in the glasses playing dodgeball. Maybe someone should point out to her the name of the game is dodgeball. Maybe She will then get out of the way of the balls. She came home Sunday afternoon well in time to watch the final few episodes of the seventh season of 'Game Of Thrones' before the long wait of almost two years ended and season eight started.
     Nastia became a big fan of the show in season five or six. Before She did I was able to sit down stairs alone and watch the show without any questions or comments or interruptions from anyone. Teri doesn't like the show and would go up stairs. I'd be all alone and I could watch the show without a pause. Ah, the good old days.
      Elena is heading into the last couple of months of high school, hopefully. She started the year in fine style getting grades in the 80's pretty much all around. Then sometime mid-school year something happened and her grades went south and her attitude returned. Things are better, but it will be a race to see if she can bring her English average back above the Mendoza line. (The Mendoza line is a baseball expression. I won't bore you with the history of it. If Your interested look it up) The Mendoza line in baseball is 200. In High School, I'm told it is 65, not 70. Elena let her average slide into the fifties. She has since bought it back up to about 61. She is within striking distance of passing.
     There are vague plans for a party this summer when (if) she graduates. I have started cleaning up the yard. I've gotten very slow these days doing yard work. It has taken me three weekend to get the leaves that fell in December from our neighbors tree into our yard and then it rained and snowed before I could finish cleaning them up, up. Let me translate that last mishmosh. The Leaves fell in December. I started raking the lawn again. About halfway through, it rained. Before it dried, it snowed, got cold and rained some more. It didn't stop before I said, "Oh I'll just get them next Spring" It gave me months before I had to pay the piper. Well, he's here now.
      When asked how things are these days, I usually reply, "Well, they could be worse, so they're not bad" and I sincerely believe that. Life is tough here on the Ponderosa (look it up), but it could be worse. The Indians or Rustlers could come and steal our cows. But until then life is good. I love my daughters to death and if I die poor because of going to Russia and raising them up to Adults and on until they retire, I will die a rich man. I know it's a bit of a cliche (Cliche: phrase or opinion, that is overused and betrays a lack of original thought) but it still will be true.











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I keep forgetting the Girls are women now.

     I keep forgetting my daughters are not little kids any more. I have always tried to have an open relation with them when it comes to sex. I have told Nastia on more then one occasion that I fully expect her to have a full and satisfying sex life, but not today. I have a habit of being a little inappropriate with the girls too and sometimes I get surprised by them.

     The other day Teri is changing her clothes, Nastia is on the phone talking with David and I'm in the bedroom with Teri. I think Nastia wanted to come into the bedroom and Teri said ,"no". Without thinking I said we were having sex. Teri gets mad because Nastia was talking to David and David heard me say that. A little while later I got down stairs and I'm walking through the Dining Room past Nastia and she says, " Done already, I thought You'd last longer then that." I stop with my mouth open expecting words to come out of it and nothing does. I'm a little surprised and I guess they are not little kids any more.

     The second Story is just one showing they are still kids, but it still surprises me to hear it come out of their mouths. Ever since We've known them we have known they curse like truck drivers. Lately they curse more in front of us then they have before. So the other day when Nastia tells her sister she sucks and Elena responds, " Well You swallow." I guess I should not have been so surprised. Nastia will be twenty-one in December and Elena will be nineteen in August. They're not little kids any more, they are full grown women and their relationships are not little kid things either any more, I guess. 

Mommy, I don't feel good. and a little of 'what's happenin' (no not that TV show)

I've got a cold. I'm hacking and coughing like there's no tomorrow. It got me to thinking about when the girls were younger and first got sick. I might have already blogged about this so I'll try to stick to the facts and make nothing up. And if I do you won't know.
     It was maybe year one or maybe year two a heavy cough was coming from the girls bedroom. It was night, the girls had been in bed for a while, no one had said they felt bad or looked sick. The Coughing kept on for a while until Teri decides to go in. I think cough medicine and cold medicine follow.
       What they had was something that got into the lungs and every time they moved to another position, like from your right side to your back, sit up, whatever, the congestion needed time to move to that side, so you'd cough until it had moved. Like having a stuffy nose, the left nostril is open, you change sides and suddenly both are clogged, then after a while the other reopens.
      Nastia, I think spent a day or two home. She would just cough and cough. After about a week Nastia was better then Elena got it. After a week it seemed to be about gone with her, when suddenly it seemed to come back. Now this congestion is sneaky, if you are standing or at least up right all day long, then you might not cough at all. Lay down and suddenly your coughing your fool head off. Elena's cough went into a second week. Teri went to lay down with her a couple of times during the two weeks and sometime in the middle of the second week Teri and I began to wonder if Elena was coughing at night to get attention, something she might have not gotten in Russia. The thought, broke Teri's heart. By the end  of the second week it was over and life went back to normal, whatever that was at the time.
      Those early years were a magical time I enjoy looking back on. Life was so much different back then.
     Back from the past. This Week Nastia has off from school. David promised to come down from Albany to spend some time with her. So on Sunday, Nastia and I went to the Mall to buy some tickets for the movie, 'Captain Marvel' so her and David could see it on Monday night.
     On Monday, I'm up stairs and I don't remember what I said, it was something like have you talked to David, shouldn't the two of you be going out for dinner about now? Something I said got her on the phone to call him. The Conversation starts out quietly. A little into it Nastia starts to get a little loud. Saying something like, Your not here yet? A few curse words follow. It looks like David is going to stand up Nastia, so I call Teri asking her if she would like to go to the movies tonight because it looks like David is standing her up. Teri and I decide if she is stood up by David, she'll return the tickets and the three of us will do something special.  Nastia continues to talk and yell and curse a little at David. For some reason I'm not surprised or angry, I'm just a little sad about it. Nastia hangs up the phone and there is a knock on the door. David had played her. He was sitting outside when he made the call. Nastia yells up to me David is here. I come down after a few minutes, they are still talking about his joke and she is saying she hates when he plays jokes like this or something like that. I joke that I was talking to Teri to find out if she knew anybody who could make someone disappear. Everyone laughs. For Nastia, life is good, David is here and not calling from Albany. They leave for the movies. The House is quiet, Elena has texted she wants to spend some time with Jasmine after work tonight. It's just Teri and I for dinner. When She gets home we have dinner almost like we used to do before the girls came from Russia. In this Version we eat dinner watching the small TV in the kitchen, instead of watching the big TV in the living room. I sit at the table, Teri stands near the sink. It's fun for what reason I don't know, but I like doing it. We clean up and then end up in the living room. I stay there until both girls have gotten home. I wonder who taught me that. The Girls get home early, always before eleven, so I don't have to wait up too late, and I don't smoke so no cigar ash will fall from my cigar onto my sleeping chest. If You don't know I'm referencing my father. He would always be in his chair every night when we got home. Another thing I try to do for my girls is when they get home have some dinner ready for them like my mom used to do. So yes Mom and Dad occasionally I was paying attention.

Daddy, when will We be able to go out on our own?

I was asked many times by the girls when they were younger, when will we be able to go out on our own? My Answer, Daughters, if you are reading this now and have kids of your own and are looking for answers was, I had no idea. Your Mom and I did it when it felt right to do and sometimes we had to hope for the best. And usually it turned out well, which made it easier to trust giving you more freedom. Trust built more trust
      OK, I'm back from the future now and onto today's story. Over the Weekend, Teri and I went to her cousin Kimmy's fiftieth birthday surprise party. It was held at the West Nyack Fire Department. It's been a few years since I've been there. The Girl's wanted to go out with their friend's. Both worked until early evening and it would have been the perfect night for the four of us to spend some time together. Sometimes plans just don't work out. Nastia wanted to go to the movies and invited Scharin. Elena was going to the Mall to hang out with some friends. Teri and I don't really like her hanging out at the Mall, but she doesn't get into trouble. Both have jobs and cars, both have paid for the privilege. NONE OF THEIR FRIENDS HAVE JOBS OR CARS. According to them none of their parents want to let them to get jobs for various reasons. NO ONE HAS HANDED OUR GIRLS ANYTHING. They were given crappy cars and each put about $2,000.00 into them before they were drivable. They pay their own gas and they pay their share of the insurance.
     Now back to our Story. Nastia invited Sharin to the movies. I'm hoping, I haven't checked, but NAstia bought the ticket for her, I'm hoping Sharin paid her back. Nastia also goes straight from work to her house with HER CAR to pick up the carless, jobless Sharin. Sharin, I'm told doesn't have a job because of all her after school activities. Hey, cool, get some money from your mother, get a ride to the mall from your mother, something from your mother so my daughter isn't the sugar for the night.
     Elena's story is even more fun. She works in Pearl River. Jasmine, her new 'friend' was dropped off at the store, she lives in the New City Condominiums. One point for her parents. Elena want to get her hat and has to pick up one of her friends, who lives in the New City Condominiums. They get to the Mall and Jessica calls, texts, whatever asking when will she be picked up? Soooooo, she goes back to Congers to pick up her friend from just up the street from us on Rt 9W. Now You ask why couldn't Jessica's mother drop her off? Well, let's just say she lives in a very dysfunctional family. So to recap, Elena went from Pearl River to Congers,to New City to West Nyack, back to Congers, and yes back to the Mall. We get a text a little after nine that they are just sitting down to eat at Red Robins. Teri and I thought it a little weird. We get occasional texts from Elena giving small updates on her night, like we're just finishing up and I'll be late getting home, I have to drop friends off. She was due in at about 10-10:30. She strolles in a little after 11. She is very good about getting home on time, doesn't argue a lot when we tell her no, she can't go out, so We cut her alot of slack and she also let us know she was going to be late.   
      So Girls this is what it looks like to be able to go out on your own on a Saturday night when your parents are no home either. One Day you'll be able to stay out real late, You know when you have your own place.

February Taco Night

It was Karl's idea to revive February Taco night. I liked the idea of doing it, so I did a mass text message to everyone whose phone number I had. It was about ten or so people. I got Nancy's reply, both the girls, Nastia and Elena's reply and Amanda saying she couldn't make it. That was it. Two weeks pass and no one else has replied. At this point I'm thinking it is not going to happen and I am on the verge of texting everyone to say it is not going to happen. On the Thursday before Saturday Taco night Karl texts he is going out to the grocery and he is picking up stuff for Tacos. I reply I still have no idea who, if anyone is coming, expecting someone to say they are coming. I get silence again. A little later I text I am bring three pounds of chop meat spiced, hoping it is enough.
     Nastia and Elena were looking forward to going to Taco night until they realized that Jessica, their friend had scheduled her birthday get together for the same day. I let them go without hesitation. I had decided to schedule taco night for this day and I wasn't going to change it for any reason. And it was starting to look like no one was going to be there. As of Karl's text on Saturday morning, I knew Karl was coming because he was going to the store to get stuff for tacos.
    Saturday Teri, Nancy and I get to my mom's about 5. The House has a good crowd in it and I am wondering if three pound, no I know three pounds of meat will not cover this crowd. Thank God someone else bought a few pounds of plain meat.
     In addition to Nancy, Teri and I, Karl and Madeline, Kristen and the two Matts were there. Eric, Lynn, with occasionally Billy and Denis, both don't eat tacos. They must be adopted. Hey wait, my girls both love tacos. I guess Billy and Denis are just picky eaters. My Mom and Harriet round out the group and it was a pleasant night. The Food was good, the shells were a little sparse, as in we didn't plan for enough of certain types of shells. I guess I should go into that a little more. Someone bought the hard shells that you buy in a box and just stick in the oven. They are good and tasty, but they alway crack down the seam every time I eat them. Karl made up some shells, corn by just heating them in a hot cast iron pan. It seemed a little sacrilegious, him and I both grew up on shells fried in a small pool of oil preferably in a cast iron pan. Those were the shells I liked best and started with. Usually I'd make up a half dozen to start with, tonight I started with two.. Shells and meat disappeared quickly. Cheese soon followed. More is bought out, I had some of the oven shells and yes both cracked down the middle dropping everything on to my plate. Cracked shells make good scoops and after about twenty minutes of eating everyone was finished. Tacos are not a slow eating food. Of the three pounds of spiced meat, there was enough left to fill a few taco shells, you know  almost enough to make a six ounce burger with, a little too close for comfort. Shells, there were a few left, I guess, I just didn't see them.
     It was a fun night. I have been writing about my life on another blog and I went around asking a few people for good memories of upstate. Karls said he had few good memories  growing up. I could understand, remembering how he and our Dad used to go at it when he'd come home at night. I tried to spark some memories from him by giving him some of mine. He had nothing. I asked Eric and he came up with a few, more from recent times. The Conversation went in another direction and I felt no one really wanted to reminisce about the past, much less the farm's past. If You ever read that other blog, you'll know why.
     It ended about 8:30, 9:00, everyone helped clean up and we all went our merry ways with promises of doing this again in a few months. I have already planned a May or June BBQ. If June it will be a Elena graduation party, hopefully, (english class young lady!) Let's see if We can communicate better this next time.

















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Weather and bowling, I guess, nothing much

There is really nothing going on right now, but I seem to be drawn to writing about it. The Weather lately has caused problems.
     It's Thursday morning, Nancy and Nevel have stayed over the past two nights. The first night, Tuesday it was supposed to be bad out the next morning, it was fine. The Weather came in Wednesday and it looked like we were going to get a bit of snow before it changed to rain. We got enough for it to be messy. Both Girls had worked Tuesday and we let them drive. Yesterday, Wednesday, Nastia had RCC and she drove there. Elena has the whole week off and is living the life of independance.
     By yesterday about two in the afternoon  it looked like we were not going to bowl. Snow started about noon or so and it started to cover the grass and the roads a little, then it stopped. With the temperature still around freezing it started to rain. For the rest of the day it stayed around freezing and rained.
     The Girls and I went to bowling, it was still raining. Elena was asked to be home by 2 and she was. We went in one car and last night the girls played one of the better teams in the league. They lost. They started the team late in the season. It had something like 45 losses and no wins. In our twelve team league, they are now in eighth place, a pretty nice accomplishment. I think they could be a better team next year. We'll see if Elena even wants to return. She seems to be enjoying herself and they have rightly earned the name 'Crazy Russians'. Next Year the team name should be 'The Crazy Russians, featuring the twisted sisters' if they get a third for their team. You know, just saying.....

Valentines Day

Valentines Day,Thursday what an excuse to eat chocolate, wait I eat chocolate every day. I guess I don't need a special day to eat chocolate.
     It's the day after Valentines Day and we are halfway through the coldest month of the year. The Days are getting longer and Baseball is right around the corner.
     Life around our household has gotten into a routine and I guess sometimes you don't know you miss something until you think about it.  The Girls are usually working. Teri and I have dinner usually alone these days. Standing or sitting at the table in the Kitchen watching the small TV.  Before the girls, we would sit eating dinner in the living room watching TV. It's a rerun I guess, or maybe it's been rebooted, like some TV shows?
     On Monday because of the snow, everybody was home, so I made Korean Beef, a recipe Teri found. It is easy, ground beef, soy sauce, garlic, sesame oil and a spice. Brown the beef with the oil add the spices, serve over rice, it's great. My point is that has been the only meal I cooked this week. Teri made stuffed peppers on Sunday I ate leftover stuffed peppers Tuesday, Parmesan Chicken from last week on Wednesday. The only time we eat together these days is Wednesday, when the girls and I go bowling and it's still leftovers.
     Last Night I'm watching TV with Teri and Nastia comes home. It's 10pm, I'm thinking it's late, time to shower and go to bed. Nastia comes into the Living Room and is still wired from work and not sleepy. Teri goes up to bed and Nastia crawls into my lap and we watch a rerun of Game of Thrones picking out all the characters we know who have died on the show. At sometime during the show we are talking about going to the movies this weekend and she points out that it has been sometime since we have done that too.
     Elena is getting to the age where she is asking to go out somewhere after work. We try to be lenient without being careless, but if you think about it, the girl gets out of work 8, 9 pm and wants to spend some time with her relatively new 'friend' Jasmine, where can you go that late? Really nowhere. We let her go sometimes, other time it's no, She has to be home by 10:30. the first few times she went out with Jasmine she got home late. It gave us a bad opinion of Jasmine since Elena is usually always on time. We talked and Elena is on time now. Last Night she wanted to stay out until 10 pm. We did a deal where she could stay out until 7 and then she would watch TV with Teri and I. It was nice. After a little while she snuggled under a blanket with Teri. It ended around 9:30 when She went up to our room to watch something on our TV. She fell asleep and spent the night in our bed. It was a little crowded, but nice. She's been a little absent from our lives lately too.
     Nastia has also spent some time sleeping in our bed lately. I haven't talked about it because at first it seemed weird and I was afraid of what people might think or say. Nastia is twenty and Elena is eighteen. When they sleep in our bed I think about what my therapist, Barbara said to me years ago that sometime people get stuck at a certain age and they need to work through it before they can move on. When they were younger, neither of them had a place of safety to go to when they were afraid and needed someone. I guess they are just working through some issues and need the safety of being close to us. David, Nastia's boyfriend has gone to Albany to college and isn't around. And Elena might be working through issues with growing up, maybe getting out of high school, some major changes. She doesn't talk much about it. Still waters run deep as they say. I hope they know we are here for them, which I'm sure they do, but coming to us with their problems is an other matter. The Parent is always the last to know, even if they are very supportive and non-judgemental. We love them so dearly I hope they know how much.
     This was supposed to be a post about Valentines Day and love. I guess it is just about love.















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First Monday in February and Karen.

I'm sitting at the dinning room table watching my daughter, Nastia scrape off the frost from her wind shield with a glove I left in her car. It is the beginning of a new week, the first full week of February and on this Monday I feel in the mood to unburden myself if you don't mind.
     Over the weekend We buried Karen. She is the sister of my brother's wife. She was only in her fifties and it was a shock getting the news. I don't remember where I was, only that Teri called and gave me the news. That seems to be the way bad new travels in our family. When Eric and Lynn were in their accident twenty odd years ago, it was Teri who called me. I was out delivering milk at the beginning of the week, I think and I was at Bardonia Deli. It's now a CVS Pharmacy.
     Ever since the call about Karen anytime the phone ring I get a feeling of dread. All the old fears have come back to the surface. Fears that this phone call will be the one.
     Both my daughters have been in small accidents since they have started driving. Nastia's recent accident is costing between $1,300.00 and $1,700.00 to fix. So much for honesty. It's going through Insurance because no one has that kind of money. It just seems she did the right thing and it feels so wrong now. I guess my moral compass is off this morning. I know accidents are part of the learning process.
      We ask the Girls to call when they get to where they are going and they are very good about calling when they have reached their destination. Ever since Karen, if the phone call comes and I have forgotten they are getting out of work or something and they are mumbling, like on occasion they do I get scared that something has happened.
     I know it will begin to fade a little as the days go by. Everyone needs time to heal. You don't expect to lose someone like Karen out of the blue like that. Their will be big holes in everyone's life for a while. Some may never heal.

End of January update

Well since I called it the end of January up date I guess I have to update you, my loyal reader or two what is going on. Nastia restarted College. Just writing that gives me a strange feeling.
     It turns out that her first semester at College Nastia did not take a full coarse load. Near the end of last Semesters I, for some unknown reason asked Nastia about her schedule and what classes she is taking. I was pleased to hear she had Friday's off. Then I add up the amount of classes she has only to find out she is taking less then fifteen credits. When I went to RCC, fifteen credits was a full class load. I wonder to myself why we let David and her register for classes by themselves. David should have known better. I tell her she needs to register for an other class to get her total up to fifteen and she will be taking a summer class or two to put her back on schedule because of her first semester. She adds the extra class and suddenly she is again going to College on Friday and again for one class.
       Mornings start a little different here now. Elena still gets up at six in the morning, but now, or at

least for the first week of classes Nastia gets up too. They are having breakfast together again and even though it's only been since Spring it seems like it's been forever and it's almost like old times around the kitchen in the morning. Then either Nastia or Elena will go and start their car and I will remember it's not, they're growing up and I'm getting older. I'm almost as old as Tony, Teri's father was when I first met Teri.
      Elena finishes up her breakfast, contacts in she is ready to go. She is told to have a good day and be safe several times. I have a bad feeling about today and I hope it is just the weather or maybe my birthday coming up, or the lady Nastia bumped calling last night with an estimate on her car. I hope I am not feeling anything else.
       Several minutes ago, I get interrupted by the phone ringing. I feel the dread of an early morning phone call. I see it is Nastia, who left twenty or so minutes ago in her car. She mumbles a little and I can't understand her. I get a little sharp with her fearing my dread of the day has come true. No, she is lost on her third trip to RCC. It is raining and I guess she missed the turn for Viola road from New Hempstead. It's easy to do. I ask her what is the name of the road she is on and she has trouble seeing it ( THOSE DAMN EYES AGAIN) she sort of spells it out for me adding she thinks she is in Spring Valley. A scary thought. I ask her to pull off the road so I can find her on Google Maps. She turns around and somehow sees a sign for RCC, something that helped me get to RCC several times when I first started going there. Her confidence returning she says she is fine and says goodbye. I relax and go back to my writing. 

If this is the worst accident, I'll be happy.

     I taught the girls to drive using all the mistakes I made and all the things I do wrong now as things they need to beware of.
      The World and the County are vastly different then when I learned to drive. The Roads have thousands more cars on them with thousands of people driving with various levels of expertise. I wanted my Girls to be better then most.
     When I drive with them and they are doing thirty miles an hour on a road that is thirty I let it go. If  they drift down toward twenty-five I have to say something for their own safety.
     I drive fast. It is something that God and I discuss regularly. Especially when He has a car pull out in front of me when I'm doing forty-five in a thirty and this person does twenty-seven. God will also put someone on my ass when I'm doing thirty-five in a thirty to remind me how it feels.
     All of this is an introduction to my daughter Nastia's accidents. Elena's might come at the end of this.
     In the beginning of teaching Nastia to drive I let her drive to the bowling alley on Wednesdays. On a bright sunshiny Spring afternoon we are driving pass Clarkstown North when a car a few hundred feet ahead decides to stop to make a left just past the ball fields. Nastia is chatting away to me as I watch this car get closer and closer. She continues to chat not slowing down. Finally I yell for her to stop and I ask if she saw the car. She said she had and she was going to slow down. I wondered if that was before or after she hit the car.
   

 On another bright and sunny spring afternoon around five, Nastia is again driving to bowling. She is doing well, she might be chatting away to me, I don't remember. We turn into the bowling alley, she chooses a parking space against the building, pulls in and doesn't stop, she climbs the wheel stop as I'm yelling stop, and crashes into the building. I guess she didn't see it. Or the sun was in her eyes. Or in all honesty, the building was dark, the parking spot was in the shade and it was a sunny day. I get out of the car after she has backed off the wheel stop, look at the front of the car and walk into the alleys. I figured what can I do, I signed up for this.
     Yesterday, Nastia comes out to my car, I'd just backed into the driveway. I'm amazed at how confident she looks and suddenly how grown up she also looks. She leans gently against my car telling me she is going to drive her sister to work, then go bowling (ah, that bowling alley again.), she has free bowling passes. We talk about this and that, nothing of importance. I always envision after life changing incidents that the time spent before them if people had only known what was about to happen maybe they would have done things differently.
     Nastia goes off to drive her sister to work. I go inside and realize I need to go to the grocery store in New City to get some stuff for dinner. Time passes before I manage to get out of the house and go. I head to Shop Rite just down the street from the bowling alley. It never enters my mind that Nastia is just down the street from where I am, I just want to get the cheese for Yankee Tower Meatloaf and get home. Too much time has been wasted and dinner is going to be late. I rush in and rush out, only thinking about the slow pokes in front of me. I get home and start dinner. Meat, Onion, cheese and the phone rings, it's Teri. She says Nastia has had a slight fender bender at the bowling alley. I don't hear anything else. I'm saying goodbye and I'm getting my coat on. This is what I have feared from the moment they both got their licenses.
     Of course someone going the speed limit pulls out in front of me. I silently curse them and any children they have or will ever have. They turn left and I make the light at Kings Highway, I'm moving now, I legally pass someone on the causeway. I'm making great time and will be there in record time. Then  I pull up behind Grandma Mosses. She's doing the speed limit. Damn it women, don't you know in New York the speed limit is just a suggestion! I follow her into New City to the light at the Courthouse. Pulling up slowly to the corner and sitting I notice a car that looks like it is sitting the wrong way in the road. I don't see any damage to it or any flashing lights. Is this it and if so where is Nastia? I continue to stare at it and realize I'm looking at the parking lot, not the road. I hear a honk behind me and I'm off running again I turn the corner and can see the road past the bowling alley. I just don't see an accident. No flashing lights, nothing. I slowly pull into the bowling alley looking for the accident. I'm tense waiting for the moment I see the accident so I can turn around and get to her. I roll slowly down the parking lot and look to the bowling alley. A lone figure stands in the fading light of the day against the building. She looks familiar, I see a familiar car. I pick up the pace and drive toward her. I see the Police and no other car, I'm confused. I park, get out of the car and go over to my daughter. She is upset fighting a losing battle with her tears. I ask her if she is ok and she then proceeds to tell me she was backing out of the parking spot and bumped a car. She went inside to tell the owner and the women insisted on calling the police and she is gone. That's the accident? I take my daughter's face in both hands and force her to look at me. If this is the worst accident you ever have I'll take it any day. I tell her she did the right thing, what we told her to do. Later on I will tell her if it happens again to check for damage before looking for the owner.
    I tap on the Police officers window and introduce myself. I ask him to tell the women I'd like to get a call to talk about where she feels this is going to before she goes to Insurance.
     Nastia has started to recover. We get a copy of the police report and finally I tell Nastia "Now the hard part comes, You have to drive home."
     I tell her to follow me and we go the easiest way home I can think of.
     At Home Teri and I tell her she doesn't drive to the mall tonight, but tomorrow she will be driving. If this is the worst accident she has I will feel blessed.
     Elena has had different accidents then her sister. Her first one happened at school. One Morning in the fall on a half lit morning Elena is slow getting up. Generally She is good about this. I am a live and let life type of person and believe that the best way to teach someone to be a better person is to let them make the little mistakes and learn from them. Teri likes to teach and part of that process is yelling you are going to be late to her daughters.
     This Morning Teri is teaching, no I guess We are both teaching. Teri is yelling upstairs to Elena that she is going to be late and I am letting Elena make her mistakes to learn from (I know it's kind of thin, but that was joke). Elena comes down in her usual joyous mood, "I'm coming all ready!" ( It needs to be said in a  exasperated  attitudy voice)( FYI: attitudy: having excessive attitude), I don't think it is a real word, but it should be. Elena has managed to become quite a person in the almost ten years she has been here. She has gone through changes that some would not have survived. She is a strong almost women who is, yes attitudy. (see above for definition).
    A Quick breakfast, some more encouragement from her mother,"You are going to be late!" and she is off to school. Teri leaves and I am about to leave when I get a call from Teri that Elena has clipped a car. I ask her to take pictures of the other car, she does. I look close at them and it looks exactly like her car, only in better shape. She has gone to the office at school to report it and I again race, I guess since this happened before Nastia clipped the car at the bowling alley and after Nastia hit the bowling alley. I guess.... I guess I need to lay down and figure this out......
     OK, I was with Nastia when she hit the bowling alley, so I guess I raced for the first time to Elena's accident. I get to the school, go through security and get to the office as they are calling the other girl down to the office. The other Girl is nice and her parents are nice, but it still costs Elena about $800.00 for a little bump on the bumper. I was hoping for a forget about it. It's just a car, or it's just an old car. I guess not.
     Elena's other accident happened when she was going to pick up Jessica and took a turn to quickly clipping a curb. She dents the rim and puts a bulge in the tire, which weakens the side wall. I hear about it, but no one seems concerned. The next Day I see the car at the curb. The Bulge looks like a major welt. Something to take to the Doctor. I tell Elena she can't take the car to work until it is fixed. I am taking the tire off her car when David shows up. I ask him another favor, if he could bring the tire to Mavis and fix the rim and replace the tire. He has it for several days, but when I go to pick it up it looks real good, almost couldn't tell it had been dented. I put it back on Elena's car and text her a picture of the tire.
Letting her know it is good as new. This Accident, because of connections of her sister's costs minimal, just 40 odd dollars.
     I know I will be adding to this story if the girls are like me when I was their age. I just don't know how my parents made it through our late teens and twenties without going insane. God bless them and God help us keep them safe.















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Made my Daughter cry

     Nastia is between semesters at RCC. If left to her self she would watch TV until about midnight, go to bed and wake up around eleven, then go back to watching TV. Maybe sometime during the day go visit with David.
     So We, Teri and I decided to give her jobs and encourage her to do things around the house. Admittedly there is little that she can do during the day outside the house. We encouraged her to tell work she was available to work during the day, so for one day they had her work earlier then four PM.
     On Tuesday night she was encouraged to do several things on Wednesday. It was suggested she do her sister's chores as well as her chores. I told her it sucks to do that, but it would be nice and she had nothing to do anyway. It was also suggested, by her mother she do the laundry. Laundry is a tricky thing. Modern laundry is easy to do, I do it, but it gets tricky when the wash is going and you go off and do something fun, like watch TV , you forget about it. Well Nastia did several loads and did well until we left for bowling. At that time the dryer and washer were loaded. I noticed it that evening when I went to take a shower. I was about to lend a hand when I thought, you know it's late and I'm feeling lazy and it will be there in the morning still and it would be better if she finished her job. So I left it.
     Thursday comes and I work late and the girls go to work before I get home. I go down stairs that evening to take an other shower and notice the dryer door open and the light was on. I walk over and see Nastia had folded the clothes in the dryer and left the wet clothes in the wash. I walk upstairs to talk to her in the living room where she is go ahead and take a guess...watching TV, good guess.
     I start by pausing the TV. She looks up at me and I think she knows something is up. Several years ago I tried to stop yelling. I noticed that even when I was not angry my voice sounded angry, so I quit yelling. My Voice still sounds angry though. "Nastia", I go, "You were doing such a good job yesterday and you blew the whole thing by not finishing the job. The Clothes in the washer have sat for over twenty-four hours and most likely have to be washed again." I see her face redden, I know what's coming. I soften my tone more and try to be a little nicer and I also talk a little softer. I go on to say, "If You were to become a teacher and you taught kids 3+5=  you would have not finished the job and you would not last very long in that job." Her Eyes are getting glassy and shine a little more in the light then normal. I soften more and try to be a little more consoling. "There is really no reason to cry, I'm not mad, I'm just disappointed." I say it softy and I watch a big old crocodile tear roll down the right side of her face, followed by a second. She is hiding her face slightly under the covers. I resist holding her in my arms debating wither or not it is the right thing, after all I am trying to teach her. I try to console her more telling her not to cry, but I guess sometimes you just have to. An other tear, smaller rolls down her face. She hides her face under the cover. I ask her if she would like a tissue, she says no, using the palms of her hands to wipe her face, going up her cheeks over her nose and eyes to her hair. I tell her she better watch out or she get green hair from boogers. I get half a smile. It all winds down about not. I go back to shower telling her I will finish the laundry up. Is that a good thing? I don't know.

Cory arrived in Africa recently I pray he will be safe and it will be a good adventure for him.







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Happy New Years 2019, sorta

I was sitting at my brother Eric's house, it was a few minutes before midnight, I was half dozing and began to think about the last few New Years when the ball dropped and I kissed Teri and said this year will be better then last year. I grew sad because this year I couldn't. Every Year I have said that to her it feels like it has been more of the same. It was a good year, because it could have been worse. Yes each year has had it's high points and it's low points, but I'm at the point of my life where I want more and better good times. I see the environment changing for the worse despite what Trumps says. I see anger every where I go and yes people still care, but it seems different. Thinking and praying for our soldiers used to be more then a political statement. It was the populace saying we're sorry about the mistakes of Vietnam on both sides and We will never make them again, we're just making them in a different way.
     I was going to make this blog posting about my laments over the last few years and not talk politics, I'm sorry, I don't want to get into that crap. I just wonder what we're leaving the next generation. I see some amazing people in my family and hpe they will have the opportunity.
      New Years was a same old, same old except I didn't tell my wife this years will be better then last year. Her usual reply would have been, I hope so. This year , I said Happy New Year. Then I said something that I hoped would have supplanted the this year will be better then last year, I just don't remember what it was and I guess maybe that is for the best. I need to stop comparing the years to each other and just be happy that everyone has survived the past year, more or less in tack and remember that I have an amazing wife and two wonderful daughters that are on track to be amazing women. People that Russia will be sorry that they gave away.

Went to see the Christmas tree in Rockefeller Center

Well my Wife talked about it for several weeks and I kept saying yes, being it was several weeks away and I didn't have to worry about it yet, well it finally came. We went to see the Christmas Tree in Rockefeller Center, on a Saturday no less.
     In the Eighties, I went with my friend, Rob, his girlfriend and my girlfriend. it was great. There were people, but We could move around and We even went for a horse drawn carriage ride. It was relaxing and fun wandering around the city, we were young and it wasn't packed.
     Flash forward thirty, I mean forty odd years and Teri is talking about going to see the tree. OK, no problem, except the girls have to get off of work or at least get out of work early. I'll finish this later

It all gets arranged and We are set to go to Manhattan to Rockefeller Center and see the Tree. We went several years ago when New York City's tourist traffic was booming. The Tree was surrounded by wave after wave of people. This Year I had hopes for better.
     The Girls got home rather quickly and We all piled into what is now Nastia;s car, the Escape. I gave her the car and bought a 2000 White Grand Am, it's my fun car. We took the Escape because a full sized SUV, like Teri's Highlander would be more expensive to park. It might cost like ten dollars more, on top of the forty dollars it costs to park now. (I hope someone is laughing at my estimation of the cost of parking a car in the city) We all pile into the car and head out. Teri has the GPS going and I head down King's Highway and see the huge tree that someone decorates every year out front of their house. Teri asks me where I'm going. Being a lad from West Nyack, everytime I went to the city I would get on the thruway and go up to the Palisades Parkway. Teri being from that cosmopolitan city of Nyack alway went down Rt 303 to the Palisades. I'm not saying she's wrong, been married too long for that, I'm saying old habits are hard to brake. I get to the Palisades Mall and see that traffic is backed up going north on the thruway, so I head to Rt 303 and go south, like Teri thought I should.
She has the GPS still going and when we get to the city it tells us to get off at 57th street, the sanitation dept. exit. It then tells me to go north. Now I'm old school/new school so I listen to it after all it is a women's voice and I have been listening to a women's voice for so long it is second nature for me EVEN WHEN IT TELLS ME TO GO NORTH TO SEE THE TREE. I listen thinking I really don't remember where Rockefeller Center is and maybe it is north. I cross several Avenues before I head up town. At the traffic circle I am told to make the second right and the GPS then turns me around and I go throught the traffic circle again again takin the second right this time heading down town, until it wants to turn me around to head back up town. At this point I ask Nancy to look up the location of Rockefeller Center because I'm going old school,

I'm going to count the streets until I get to the right street then I'm going to count the Avenues until I get to the right one. It sort of works. I am reminded on my trip cross town that there are no turns off the roads in midtown. I drive straight until I think fifth Avenue to make my right. I watch several lights change without moving wondering why idoits are in the intersection when the light changes, well unil I do it anyway, it looked like I'd fit. The Cop I didn't see tells me he said to stop. No ticket, thank god. Down fifth Avenue until I get to 48th and I turn right. I'm looking for parking. 48th was a big mistake. We sit and watch the light change several times and only move a few feet. I think back to all the stories about how bad traffic in the city has gotten over the years and remember it was never this bad when I went to see the tree. It get worse when an Ambulance tries to squeeze down the street. After twenty minutes, half an hour I get moving again. I'm squeezing in front of cars, going places I would never have gone just to get out of the traffic we've been sitting in. I scare myself. Later Nastia comments about it. I don't apologize, maybe I should have, it is her car now. I just show bravado, Well I got us here, didn't I? Wrong message to send really.
     It takes two hours from house to parking garage. We finally see one 257 West 47th street, I pull up, exhausted only to have the attendant wave we away. I begin to back out onto the street when he runs down saying someone is leaving. We have a parking spot. Life is good.
     We walk toward Rockefeller Center and follow all the people. It gets more and more crowded. We are heading east, then We turn uptown on some Avenue and are stopped by huge crowds. We are only able to move forward when the walk signal says to. It takes several changes for us to get to the signal. We cross thinking it will be better on the other side, it is not. We go another block. I see  Radio City and remember Rockefeller Center is near. We get to that block and it is no where to be seen, I want to go home. Nancy says to circle around, so We do. We go left a block, right a block, the crowds start to get heavy again we hang another right and end up back were we were. Someone, maybe Nancy says to go toward Radio City it's on the other side.
Finally we find it. Everyone is happy and I think it looks like the one down the street on Kings Highway, only this one took over two hours to see. We take lots of pictures and leave. Carmines where we wanted to eat is booked . Teri called several days ago. So We head to the parking garage to pick up Nastia's mud splattered car.
Mud splattered because she is parking on what was a one time the lawn. I glance at the price of parking, expecting something around $40.00  here is the laugh from earlier, $57.00, I pay it and increase my tip to the guy getting the car to $6.00, it's all the cash I have. I'm a little out of touch I guess. We go home and have a nice dinner at a diner in Nanuet. All in all much walking was had by all.









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Christmas Hang over

Christmas is over and all those - "Well, I'll deal with the credit card next month' days are upon us, well almost, New Years is in a few days. Teri kept saying she wanted to get the girls automatic car starters. I thought it was a bad idea, the cars being old and how many years will they keep them. It was their favorite gift and they can't wait to get them installed.
     The Girls gave me money as part of my gift. I want to put an expensive radio in the Grand Am. It will be AM, FM, have Sirius, be blue tooth and maybe have GPS. All of that will be more then $500.00, big money for a radio in 2018 and even in 2019!(that's a joke. I'm told no one gets my jokes) it's big money.
     The Girls have also put big money into their cars this month. I feel bad for them, but it was something that needed to be done. The big question is when is it too much money. Nastia was given my car. It has 155,000 miles on it. I knew it needed some work, but David her boyfriend found more that it needed and she spent $1055.00 on it. ( yeah, big money in 2018 and even 2019). It needed a head gasket, brakes, two front tires, more stuff then I can remember.

     Elena gave Nastia $700.00 for the repairs she did on the Toyota that Teri's father used to drive. then recently she hit a curb and a new tire and straightening out the rim cost $47.00. New Struts and a power steering hose set her back another $1,300.00, When is it too much? At this point both have cars they are happy with and run safely, god willing.
     Next they get the automatic starters installed. At least Teri prepaid for that.

Christmas Day

Christmas is no longer the day it was. It used to have a little magic to it and the Girl belief in Santa Claus helped. I remember telling them as I ran up stairs I think I heard Santa's sleigh  and they better get to bed. Or the other time I told them about the time I saw Santa Claus when I fell asleep in the chair in Nyack one Christmas eve. These are stories I guess I'll have to save for the grand kids
     I watched  Nasta wrap some of her presents. She used twice the amount of paper needed and half a roll of tape to sort of wrap a present for Teri. I stepped in to show her how to measure the paper and how to fold the corners and end up cutting the wrapping paper about an inch too short. some lesson. She comes up with cutting out trees from the design on the paper to hide the shortage, good idea.            Elena is better, she uses less paper. You can still tell she wrapped the present her self. I have to say I am proud how they have both grown to buy their own presents with their own money and to wrap them mostly on their own. It was only a few years ago I supplied the money and helped wrap them. They bought their presents down and put them under the tree. Teri spent a day and a half wrapping presents and I helped her bring them down from where she wrapped them in the attic. We didn't wait for them to fall asleep like in the past.
     This Year there was no letter to Santa, no cookies or chocolate milk. We bought the Santa my mom made a few years ago (over ten years ago now) and pulled out a letter to Santa from Nasta and Elena. It might have been their first letter to Santa. We passed the letter around and put it back where it was for someone to discover it again in the future. Everyone went to bed late and when the sun rose the next morning it was just Teri and I who got up early. Nancy joined us and I went back to bed to keep Mosha company in the bed room while Nancy's dog, Nevel got some time to run around. Around eleven we opened gifts. Then We made a trip over to Karl and Madeline's for a visit and a little brunch. Dinner was about 3 pm and We had a very tasty Rib Roast. Dinner was attended by Teri, Nastia, Elena, Nancy, Amanda Tony and myself. I was a nice dinner.
     I tried off and on to take a nap, never quit succeeding. Every time I tried there was a chore I was needed for.
     At 5 pm David joined us. Around 6:30 We, now a group of  eight went over to Eric and Lynn's. Eric had fallen two days earlier and had limited mobility. His poor legs. Karl and Madeline made a rare appearance and it was a nice night. We played the Yankee Trader gift game and some where in the middle the rules got broken, no one seemed to mind. People were teaming up and working to get the present they wanted. It was funny, but it got redundant after a while. Someone would take a gift from Nastia, then she would take her boyfriends gift and he would take the gift she wanted back. There were several couples that did this. It was funny at first, later it got a little boring. Teri wanted to keep a picture my mom drew and Denis wanted to take it from her, so she tried to hide it under her shirt. Denis one upped her when he put on a pair of rubber gloves and used a grabber people in wheel chairs use. It was the funnest moment of the night. Company and deserts were nice. Now finally Christmas is over.  Just New Years left.

Setting up the Christmas Tree

Setting up the Christmas Tree has become a chore. Way back in the before time (When is that?, Well I guess that was when it was fun to put up the Christmas Tree) it was fun to put up the tree.
     Since I have known Teri, she has had something against putting up Christmas Trees. The first year We were together, my Mom gave her a small tree put put up in her apartment. It was a foot or so tall, fake and of little bother. She at first didn't want to take it. She thought since she was not celebrating Christmas their it was not necessary to have any Christmas decorations. She took the tree and put it up in her cramped little Apartment.

     I'd been out of my mother's house for a few years before I met Teri and I'd had a Christmas Tree every year and begun collecting Hallmark ornaments for the tree. More about that later.  The Trees had always been real and full sized. My Mother gave me some ornaments for the family collection to start me off. I chose several of the ornaments that I had memories of putting up on the tree. A bird with faded paint, some thin glass ornaments that when they were bought were felt best put on the bottom of the tree so if the animals knocked them off and broke them who cares. They now held a place of value in my heart. The most important one was an ornament so old the writing was barely legible. It was silver and one of m,y Dad's. I wrote in another blog, in an other life about how I imagined it came to the family and then how It was given to me by my mother and several years ago broken purely by mistake. One of those events, that no matter how you spin it could of happened to you, it just happened to someone else.
Teri's and my First Christmas together she suggested we not have a tree. "Why have one when We are not going to be here" She said. A Valid point, but I wanted one and I needed  one. It wouldn't be festive without one. So We got one. It was a real tree and Teri didn't like the mess of it. Needles falling off it every day, watering it every day and the fire hazard. We came to a compromise, fake one year, real the next. We did it for a few years until one year I thought, "Man real trees are a pain. let's go fake." so We did.
     The Fake Tree we used for years required you to put up a three piece center pole, then take a lower branch, smooth out the needles and limbs, then put it in the correct slot. Each Branch took several minutes to straighten after it had spent eleven months in a bag.
   

  A new Tree was purchased two years ago. It has two separate strings of lights already hung on it and all you have to do is set up the three pieces of the tree, the branches are pre-hung along with the lights. Of course, you still have to smooth out the needles and branches.
      Is piece was not supposed to be the length of 'War and Peace' so I a\m sorry I have rambled.
      On the night We,Teri decided to set up the tree, a discussion between Teri and I erupted, yes discussions can erupt. It centered on the thought from Teri that the Tree had to be put up on this night.(December 9) before it got too late.
       In fairness We do a bad job of getting decorations up in a timely manner. We scoff at the people who put them up just after Halloween, We laugh at the amateurs who insist just before Thanksgiving is acceptable. "Fools!!" We decry, "How can You have the Christmas spirit when we have not even celebrated the day of giving thanks declared by Abe Lincoln, himself after the Civil War!" "Cynics, money lenders, Store Owners you all...." I guess I've gone off topic again, sorry.
     After all that decrying, suddenly it's the week before Christmas and We are the only Christian house without lights. Even the Jew have Hanukkah lights up. So in our hast We put up some lights on the house, never the way it was planned, try to stick stakes in the frozen ground to hold down the light up deer (really feel Christmasey doing that) and finally the tree gets up. After it is all up and We sit back, we wonder why we waited and didn't do it sooner. Ah, life is funny.

     Well, Teri wants to put up the tree on December 9th, Sunday. It had not been a day of rest for me. I started cookie baking because just like the Christmas tree, cookies never seem to get baked like they did back when I was a kid and my mom would set aside a day to do it with us. I started out with my Christmas cookie,
the pinwheel cookie. I don't know how or why I associate this non denominational cookie with Christmas except it was baked around Christmas one year and I guess I loved it and decided I needed to have it again when I thought about cookies for Christmas the next year. After that I made Russian nut balls. The Name  get Nastia's attention until she hears nuts are in them. Crazy Kids, one day she will grow up and realize life is incomplete without some nut, relatives or from a tree, it doesn't matter. I thought I was making Teri's favorite Christmas cookie, it was not her's it was her sister's, opps. And finally I made Raspberry chocolate bars, but I put all of the raspberry jam into Nastia's cheese cake so I had to use Blackberry Jam. It was almost as good.
       So I guess after all of that I was tired. Plus We went to see a real good movie called Green Book.
     I'll finish this later

I'd taken teh tee down a few days before. I have learned to some time anticipate what needs to be done and do it in advance. Other times I procrastinate and let it hit me full in the face, but not this time.
 The Girls get involved in putting up the tree. Elena is figuring out what goes firdt and I show her willingly stepping aside to watch the tree go together. Slowly all the pieces are put together and the different outlets are connected. I want to put some of my old Hallmark orniments up and I bring down a string of lights they fit. The Girls start to pull out the orinments from Hallmark and I remember why I stopped putting them up. I guide them, Teri says lecture them on the proper way to handle them. Some go up and some of the older one are not working so well. The Train with Santa in it is not going off like it should and the whistle sounds drunk. I get sad, theses stupid orniments are important to me and it is too soon for them not to work. I look at the box on one, it is from 1992. I remember I'm 60 and I bought this almost half a life ago.
     Tree is up and the boxes go back up stairs, to make Teri happy. An Other Lesson I've learned over the years. Christmas is here and the tree is up. Now what about those lights. Oh yeah, I got the ones from last year still up All I have to do is find an extension cord. Christmas is so much fun.

















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The rest of Her birthday

     As far as Birthday's go, this one had a little drama, a few tears were shed and I felt bad for causing them. So It was a standard day in the life of our family.
     After I stopped yesterday, Nastia and Teri went off. Nastia gets dropped off at College, because she is still not sure of the way home, then Teri goes to work in Mahwah NJ. I left around quarter to nine to go visit my mom, then head to world in Elmsford. Elena had left for North High School around 6:30 in the morning.
     I get home around 3:30. Nastia is home, but where is Elena? A quick Phone call finds here shopping for her sister's birthday gift, daughter like father, I guess. Teri says she will be home by 6 pm. Around 5 pm Nastia gets a text from David, he can't make it to her birthday. I've gotten the feeling lately David is making space between her and him, but this time I think the reason is earlier in the week I had asked for it to just be the four of us. Usually when We go out it is not. We invite others and it's nice, but it is also nice to occasionally have it be just the four of us. Nastia had asked that David be included and immediately Teri and I had said yes. Well Nastia told David we had wanted it to be just the four of us, but she had asked for him to join us and I thought that was what had happened. After all the grief I'd given him before, now that I wanted him to be part of of life and family he was not going to be there on this important day. So I did what I do best and yell. It was not the fierce roar of a lion, I can't yell like that anyway any more, it was more of a semi restrained 'See this is what happens when you tell someone something that they don't need to know' voice. I tried to keep it calm, but I didn't succeed. Near the end of the sort of short tirade I manage to soften my voice, but it is too late. Nastia's head is bowed, she's looking at the floor, seeing nothing and I know what is next. I take her in my arms and hug her telling her I didn't want to make her cry on her birthday. Resilient as ever she is back to herself soon, me, I feel like crap for a while longer. Feeling bad I text David being diplomatic and still thinking he isn't coming because of his chat with Nastia I say
  " I heard you can't go with us. I hope everything is ok. I also want you to know how important it is for you to be with us tonight if there is anyway you can make it. You would be a welcome addition.' He texts back asking when and where we will be. Teri texts him that he is a part of this family whether he likes it or not and has to come, or something to that effect

Teri gets home around 6:30 and off we go to Gilligan's in Mt Ivy, one of Nastia's favorite places to eat. It's a Monday night, business is slow so they have only one room open. There is a short wait and We are seated. Muscles are ordered and Teri and Nastia proceed to devour them. I used to eat them and try one.They are good and garlicky. Teri goes to the bathroom and the weirdest conversation happens. Lets see if I can get this straight.
      Nastia is devouring the muscles and she asks Elena if she wants some.
      Typical Elena says, "No" then adds, and I should of seen this coming. " Do you know what these look like?", as she picks one out of it's shell I knew where this is going, but it is like an accident, I just can't look away. " It looks like a Vagina," she says. I chuckle.
      Nastia, without a blink says,"Well these are juicy vaginas and I'm going to eat them."
Daughters, you've got to love them.
     About halfway through dinner David does show up and tells why he is late. It seems his half brother got into a fight and was taken to the Hospital. He lost a tooth and might have some damage to a bone in his face. It wasn't clear what happened, except he got his butt kicked. He will be alright it looks like.
     David orders a burger, Elena ordered chicken fingers and fries.While waiting she ate bread. When Her meal arrives, she doesn't touch it. I had promised Teri I would say nothing. Every so often I would look over at her plate, the Chicken and fries  covered with ketchup getting cold. I managed to say nothing all night, but guess what she is having for dinner tonight?
     Nastia ate ok. She ate a lot of the Muscles and about half of her Scallops and linguini in a white sauce. Davidate 3/4 of his burger and since he is not officially family yet, I also kept quiet.
     Teri had a lobster dinner for one and did a good job on her meal. I don't worry about her taking leftovers home. She will eat them.
     Me, I ate some bread, I ordered Fish and chips. The Fish was a little over breaded and dry, but I finished all of it,because that was how I was raised. Remembering my mother saying there are starving children in China. We were done by about 8:45 and it was a nice evening.






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Nastia at 20, OH MY GOD!!

     It is Nastia's birthday, she is twenty.I looked back at some of her birthdays and I can remember some as clear as day,others are in the distance seen through a heavy fog.
     I read some out loud to Nastia, I thought it a fun way to spend a morning. One I had to stop reading before it made me cry, her eighteenth. I can't be seen crying over a silly thing like what I wrote about her eighteenth birthday now can I? I then went to a safer one and read the first few lines of her first birthday in America. It was sweet and innocent and my favorite part was when she told the principal at Congers Elementary school,Mrs. Ryan, it was her happy birthday to you.
     I guess it is time to share a paper Nastia did for school in October. It is not really in the spirit of the day, so excuse me, it's just I want to now.

Anastasia Muller 9/28/18

    The Narrative Essay

My life changed completely when my sister and I were adopted in September 2009. This is a story of how I became who I am today and how my sisters and my life changed for the better.

I was born December 3rd, 1998 in a small Russian village in the far east called Obluchye. My Russian mother was only nineteen years old when when she gave birth to me and and about twenty when she had my sister. When I was about three or four years old I was taken away from my mother in hopes that she could take care of my sister and I would be returned later. She was unable of being a mother because she had problems with drinking and because of that she lost her parental rights to us. After my mother died at age 23 bouth my sister and I were taken to an orphanage where we spend half of your lifes.

The orphanage was in a city called Birobidzhan and the city was nothing like my hometown. There were a lot of people walking around cars driving by and wild animals like dogs running around trying to find food. Growing up in the orphanage was not easy for me because I dd not have any friends, all the kids were mean to me and bullied me for no reason. I had one lady who came once a week to take me out and spend some time with me. She would always bring treats for me like ships and soda which I enjoyed and I could not wait untill she would come back again. As I got older I went to school to learn and become smarter. The school was very small and the education was not that great because the teacher did not know what she was doing. Even though the education was not good I still learned little things like how to speak properly and use words in the right way.  

There was a time where during the holidays the whole orphanage would get together and celebrate. For Example when it was christmas we would have this giant tree with different decorations on it and all of the kids would come around the tree and dance. I remember wearing this beautiful dress and dancing around the tree and that was the time I was very happy and grateful for having something this great in my life. I remember this one time where the people who ran the orphanage would take us out in the winter time to a giant mountain of snow where we would slade down the mountain and crush into a pile of snow. I also remember during the fall the hole orphanage would gather all of the leafs put the  leafs in different piles and then burn them. Those days were the best times I ever had. One of the days that I did not like was my birthday, because when my birthday came around no one would wish me a happy birthday or gave me a gift. That day I would always be sad and just stay away from people and have a day to myself where no one could bother me. The only person that I had in the orphanage was my little sister and even she would be mean to me and I never knew why. After awie my sister and I got closer to each other because of the incident she had. We were all outside playing on a playground just having fun. My sister decided to go on the monkeybars and climb like a monkey would,little that she knew that the monkey bar would be slippery so when she went to crab one of the bars she slipped and fell landing on her arm and breaking it. After that happened she had to go to the hospital so I did not see her for awhile.  When she returned to the orphanage I was so happy to see her that I jumped on her and pushed her stomach a couple of times. From there my sister I were closer than we ever been.

My time at the orphanage went by so fast it felt like I just got there a small little girl who was scared and alone. I was not a little girl anymore and I was not alone with my sister by my side. Years had passed by and I was still in the orphanage wishing I was out.  One day the greatest day of my life happens to be where two american couple fell in love with my sister and I and wanted to adopt us. Your first time in america was when we went to spend the summer with the american couple. We got to do so much fun stuff like go to a summer camp and a gymnastic camp. After we got to meet them we felt the same way they felt about us. When the summer ended my sister and I had to go back to Russia because  the american couple had to do all the paperwork before we can go with them for good. The adoption process was long and annoying but we finally got through it. After we got adopted our journey to a new county began. The plane ride was very long and uncomfortable,but my sister and I were too excited to care. Once we got to america we went to a family friends house so that the family can meet us and we can meet the family. As the years went by my life changed so much I had a new home and new family that loves me and friends that care about me. I also learned a new language which was very hard to do because I could not understand my parents and they could not understand me. Also school was not easy for me either because I could not understand the subjects and the language and I had to start fourth grade when school started and I did not like it.

Coming to America from Russia was the best change that ever happened to me because I  have a family that loves me friend who support me and best of all a better life than I could ever ask for. I would not change anything for the world because the change made me who I'm today and nothing can ever change the decision I made.

More about her birthday later.