It's July 2nd and nothing is going on

It's July 2nd and I started this entry in mid June with the title: 'It's mid June and nothing is going on'. Obviously I've had to change the title because it's now July 2nd. I find it difficult to take the time now to write about what is going on with the girls. I used to write in the morning before I went to work, when it was quiet. I'd then go and visit my mom and head for work around 9:30. Well now I guess I've gotten an adult job because I get up at 7 and I'm out of the house by 7:35. It kind of reminds me of when I was going to high school because I did the same thing at the same time. Well you know what they say, What's new is old again or something like that. They always have an opinion, but sometimes they don't make sense. It's mid June and nothing is going on and that is with two daughters in their twenties. Covid seems to have ebbed enough that you are only reminded of it when you see someone wearing a mask or there is a report about cases rising again after falling for the last several weeks. Monkey Pox is the next pandemic everyone is waiting for with bated breath* Teri and I talked about going to get the second booster sometime soon. The girls, I don't think they need one or can get one. Either way, Covid is looking like it is finally in the rear view mirror. Everyone in the world is acting a little crazy. Maybe it is the taste of freedom for the first time in about two years or maybe it is all the crazies are just being crazy, either way there are alot of shootings and it seems people have finally caught on to Donald Trump's three card monty game** and his attempt to overthrow the Republic. The one thing I've learned over the last few years and all the other failed Republics knew, is democracy is not a hardwood. They are thin veneers that can be removed if not properly cared for. I've tried talking to the girls about it, you know coming from a country that has been ruined by an elected dictator. Putin and his war in Ukraine has changed the world. Elena will give her tough girl act and say she doesn't care and it has nothing to do with her. Nastia will say she hates Putin, but there is no thought about almost losing the republic on January 6th. I always thought that coming to America from another country, not as babies, but young children you'd develop more of a love and understanding of how lucky you are to be here, but I guess they were still too young and hadn't experences a repression of the Putin regime. Even with all of America's faults, there is no other place I'd like to call home. I will get off of my soap box now*** I'm a little disappointed in their love of democracy. I'm sure as they get older it will change.

Elena seems to be loving her job. She was given work shirts and I have always told Elena to take her time and to write clearly. After seeing her name on her work shirts I believe she wrote it quickly. Her name is spelled E-L-E-N-A. Her work shirts are for someone with the name Elna, E-L-N-A. ah, fun times. Elena hasn't seen Matt too much lately and there hasn't been any love bites either when she goes over. One day she'll have to tell me what is going on in that relationship. Are they really just friends now. I find it hard to believe, but I don't know. I just can't believe she has split from him and I don't hear or see her expressing any desire to find someone else.

Now Nastia on the other hand can't be without a guy around. She hangs around Kevin mostly all the time. There is no expression or shows of feelings between the two, but I can't help feeling that at least Kevin has feeling for her. Last night he went to the movies with us, well sort of. He went to the Palisades Center and ate food with us in the food court. He then goes to see Doctor Strange, we go to see Minions. Just before the movie Nastia realizes she has lost her air pods. The find my air pods app shows them at Stop and Shop. After the movie we head over there. Kevin is there and helps Nastia look for them. That is classic Joe Muller when he was a kid and looking for love. But Nastia will say they are just friends. He even went to the July 4th fireworks at Felix Festa Middle School of Friday. Nastia is racist in her dating habits. She says she doesn't date white guys. Obviously she also doesn't date guys that put her first, let her be herself, don't ostracize her from her friends and are respectful of her family. Kevin has been over our house more in June then her former boyfriend was in the year and a half they dated. There is some weird things, maybe weird is the wrong word. There are somethings going on. When Nastia goes up to her room to shower or change Kevin goes with her. This started so quietly that no one noticed for a while. Then when it was noticed, it was like... ah, do we say something, it is our house, but she is twenty-three and they are not having sex, at least I don't think so. I'm not crazy about it, but what is the harm compared to the hassle of stopping it and I also do remember my mother allowing me to have girlfriends in my bedroom and what happened in there... So nothing has been said.

I usually like to end things on an up beat note and express my love of my life and the people in it. I am very aware of how old everyone is getting, the dogs included. We lost a second cousin several weeks ago, Wally, he was in his eighties. My mom and Wally were very close, they would email back and forth all the time. My mom just turned 88, her brother Tonny, just turned 91, I'm 64, just a child, Karl is soon to be 68 and my dad died at 66. I'm very aware how fragile live is and a moment in time. There are many times I'd love to go back to, to relive again. Times where life was good. I have a picture on my computer of me in my early twenties, around 1980, with my foot up on my Jeep and at the time I didn't realize just how happy I was. It was years later that I realized. I look at my life with Teri and the girls and even though I don't see them as often as I'd like, Nastia is sleeping over this friends house or Elena is working and then going out with that friend. This time of my life though not perfect is a pretty wonderful time. I know the girls will not take that moment to realize their in a pretty wonderful time of their lives, mostly because I think like myself back in 1980 even if I took a moment to think about it I could not have appreciated it like I appreciate being alive now. It's not perfect, I know. Teri works too hard and is stressed, but we're all together. One day that will change,but it is not today. *With bated breath-In great suspense, very anxiously or excitedly- I love expressions and saying and tall tails and all that other stuff they say and have no idea where it's from- There they go again saying stuff. ** Three Card Monty- Three-card Monte – also known as Find the Lady and Three-card Trick – is a confidence game in which the victims, or "marks", are tricked into betting a sum of money, on the assumption that they can find the "money card" among three face-down playing cards. *** I think I've explained this before, but I just love this stuff. People who wanted to preach or provide advice to people in a public place used to stand on a wooden box to raise themselves above people to be heard and seen. Often, this would be a wooden box used for carrying soap in, and it became known as "preaching from a soap box". To say to someone "get off your soapbox" means to tell them to stop preaching or providing advice. /

The guy she's not dating, Elena's and my new job/.

Nastia and her last boyfriend broke up several weeks ago. She told me she was sad and was doing everything to keep her mind off her former relationship. She went bowling several times. She spent time with friends her old boyfriend didn't want her to hang out with and she spent more time with JJ (Jessie). On Saturday, I think she said she was going out to dinner with a friend. This is a game I have played with her several times and I have started to learn the rules. She will not volunteer any information, I'll have to ask for it. So I go down the list of questions. Who are you going out with? A friend, What is their name, Kevin, Where are you going? Out to eat. Where? Gilligan's, When? 7pm. How do you know him? From work. It went on like this for a few more questions. I got all of the information I needed and when he showed up I told her to invite him in. For now on all people I don't know or can't place will get invited to come in if she is to go out with them. Nastia's reply to asking him to come in was, "I'm not dating him." none the less he needs to come in. and in he would come. As I waited, I stood in the hallway, near the front door and the parlor not knowing where to stand, where to put my hands,or even how I should greet him. I figure he is just as uncomfortable as I am and if I was just friendly, it'd be fine. He comes in the door and looks as tall as Billy. His six foot, maybe four towers over Nastia's five foot about two inches. I say hi and he says the same. We are both pleasant and he calls me sir. I liked it, but told him he didn't have to call me that. After a few moments they leave. Several hours later she is home. Sunday she goes out with him again, this time to Hard Wok in Blauvelt. While questioning Nastia she says she is going to his place after dinner. Or maybe she said that when I texted her later. Everyone reading this or hearing this know what happens when a girl goes to a guys apartment. I didn't blink. She didn't hide it. I control what I can control, ignore what I can't. Nothing happens at his house. Nastia know on Sunday she has to be home by eleven. At eleven I text her, 'Where are you?' She replies she is on her way home. About eleven-thirty five or so she come in. I'm angry, but I'm trying to hide it. Her and her mother are talking when she says something that is just such an obvious lie I can't remain silent. And of coures, I can't talk, I yell. Thankfully Teri shuts me down quickly and I listen. The conversation ends quickly after that and she goes to bed. Monday, I talk to her before I go to work and tell her why I was so angry. I tell her I want to talk to her more after I get back from work. That evening she is out with the guy she is not dating. Tonight, Wednesday, June 8th we make plans to go see Jurassic Park, World Dominion. I tell Nastia, who is with Kevin, the guy she is not dating that we are going on Saturday, does she want to go? She asks if Kevin can go? Teri says to tell her he can go only if she is dating him. She says she isn't. He is going because everyone except her knows who she is dating. Elena, whos is not dating Matt dispite the hickies on her neck got a new job. ShopRite was paying her $16.00 an hour with benefits. Not the kind she is getting from Matt. Her new job she gets $14.00 an hour, no benefits. She is at that age where she doesn't care. She wants to be happy at her work. I can't blame her, I loved the job I just left. She started two days after I started mine. They have her doing oil changes and some tire repairs. She come home very dirty, but happy. It seems she has developed a bit of an attitude problem. Teri keeps telling me it is me, not her. If it is true, it is best I keep my distance for a little while. She doesn't have the ability to turn down the anger or the ability to apologize. I wonder if something is going on at work or in her life to cause her to act out like this. I asked her to sit down this morning on the bed and asked her about work and her life and if something is going on without using those words. She said work is great, everything else is fine. I hope I don't look back on this peroid of time and ask why I didn't see it coming. I really believe something is going on with her. It might be just her feeling a sense of independence or maybe she feels lost and alone, or somewhere in between, or maybe it's nothing at all. A couple of days before she started her job, I started mine. I loved my old job, but it was time to leave. While training my replacement I told her I would be going through all of the issues she is going through in a week, and I have. I've gone from knowing the system backward and forwards to being lost on the new one. My new bosses keep telling me repation, repation, repation and so I continue on, Now all that has to happen is Teri find a new job. /

Old Dogs and more memories

This is Memorial Day weekend. It is special for so many reasons. Elena and I start new jobs this week, Teri had surgery on this past Tuesday and they kept her over night when it was supposed to be in and out, but she is fine and she says her pain is manageable.

I bought Misha to the vet on Saturday before the parade.I was surprised at how good of a car dog she is considering how she doesn't like new and different. The vet gave her steroids to help with her failing back legs. Athena is over weight and can not get up on the bed. Since Teri's surgery, I pick Athena up and put her on the bed. And Bandi is old and blind. He is less mean since he gone almost blind. I'm afraid we'll lose all three in a short peroid of time. Yesterday for the first time in two years the Memorial Day parade was held. It was overcast and it on and off rained for a while. Teri didn't go, Nastia was at work, so I asked Elena to go with me we get down to the corner. The

crowds are sparse. It is raining after all. Elena and I stand there and watch the parade.It is sparsely attended and it is small parade. There were two bands, both adults. There were no school bands, but the girl scouts, the boy scouts and the little leagues were there. COVID after effects, I guess. Elena talked about being in the parade one year. I reminded her she held the banner for Conger's Elementry school.The school no longer exists, it's now a learning center. About half way through the parade a train stops the back half for about five minutes. Elena had talked about a train coming and crashing into the parade. I did grocery shopping. Teri is not suppose to do any lifting for a while, so after the parade I waited for the rain to stop. Instead it got harder and harder. I told Teri I was not going to go today. We had a little discussion about it, Teri pointing out the sales ended today and I said my ark is in the shop. I got into my car and started towards New City because I think Rt 303 and Rt 59 would be flooded. At the corner of Kings Highway and Congers Rd there is a river, so I turn around. Later around 5PM, I go with Nastia and yes we spend too much money. Heading back I want to drop off the groceries at the house before we go to West Nyack. Nastia said don't, mom would just say not to go, so we went to both ShopRites looking for dog food and yes Teri did ask "Why it took so long?" and say, "I told you not to go to both, and did you find any?"

Once a long time ago I came home in a bad mood. I didn't know it and I have told the story several times. The girls were going for a walk, dinner was almost ready. I told them not to go. Elena, in retrospect must have been in a bad mood too because she verbally came at me and she doesn't know how to back away. I guess it is a defensive mechanism when she was helpless in the orphanage. A 'never again' thing and I guess that is were the gym comes in too. The night I had to resist with all my might for putting her through a wall. Sunday, she come home from her last day at ShopRite, changes and went out. From upstairs Teri yells down "She didn't vacuum her room!" I said, "call her." Teri replys,"you." Without a thought, I do. In our conversation, I don't get angry. I've menationed why. She keeps saying she'll do it when she gets home. I keep telling her she was suposed to do it before and needs to come back and do it. She gets angry and tells Matt. "Turn around, so he'll shut up." I felt the angry boil inside me. She'd said something to me deeply disrespectful and I knew the best place for me was not to be there when she came home, I call to Teri, "I'm going for a drive." She asked why and I tell her. I rush out of teh house forgetting my phone and my hat. As I'm leave hoping I'm hoping I don't pass her on the road. I drive down South Conger Road until the end not knowing where I'm going, I remember Teri wants Potato salad from Valley Cottage Deli. I go there to get it and a sandwich for me. I visit my mother until I'm sure she is gone. At this point I think I am doing a good thing. I really don't want to get angry at her and possibly​ put her through a wall. I think I have done the smart prudent thing until Wednesday three days later when Elena says what I think is a very disrespectful thing to Teri and I come into the kitchen where she is and tell her so. Teri asks me,"Why do you hate her so?" I am so angry at that question, I turn around walk out and throw my shoes down into the cellar. I hear Teri say something about sticking a knife in an eye and I turn around and storm into the kitchen and tell her to do it and get it over with and storm out. I turn around and tell her, "I assume you were talking about me" and leave. We both do our best to get past the event. Lately we've been pretty good together. Elena starts her new job at the tire place in New City on Thursday. Maybe she is up tight about it. I'll never know because she'll never tell. Either way she came home tonight and said she had a good day and they asked her to change tires and to drive a couple of standard shift cars into the bays. She said she didn't know how to drive standard. I wish I had a car to teach her. /

Time Passages

It's an older persons lament, "it seems like it was yesterday." I was in working on Elena's room, and yes to me it seems like I started that yesterday. I was painting the door jam and trim from her room to the future and past office. Up and down the trims I went, going back to parts of the trim I'd painted earlier making sure there were no drips and what was still visable of the fancy part of the trim was not more obscured. On an up stroke I come face to face with the lines I put on the door jam for the heights of the girls. Nastia's on the left, Elena's on the right. They start on 9-18-2010, Nastia at 53 inches and Elena at 53 inches. I stop a few days before Christmas in 2015. Elena had gone from the previous year's 62 inches to 63 1/2 inches. Nastia had fallen behind her sister and quit growing. In 2013 she was 60 inches, 2014 60 1/2. In 2015 there is no mark because she was still the same height. She was not at all pleased. I was in Target with Nastia the other day when she said she needs pants. I say ok and she makes a right turn and I follow. She heads into the childrens section, towards the jeans. She measure pant up against herself, some fit others are a little short. She looks at me and says, "It sucks shopping in the kids section, but for ten bucks, you can't go wrong." I laugh and try to imagine what that must be like. She looks over at the underwear and says, "I need adult underwear." and walks away. Another fun time passages, hey I'm getting slow and forgetful. I could have started this whole column off talking about the song time passages by Al Stewart* Well this time passages is I worked some more on Elena's room. I taped some more trim and painted around the door, where I came across some lines I drew on the door frame showing how tall the girls were getting. I remember how my

mom used to do it during the month of August we'd spend upstate. She'd draw the line at the top of our heads as we tried to stand up as tall as possible. The lines were drawn on the door frame from the kitchen to the dinning room. Then one day my dad is painting the door trim and paints over the lines, like it was nothing. I was disappointed. Back in Elena's room I painted around the pencil marks not getting to close to the lines. They can stay for a little longer.

*Time Passages Al Stewart It was late in December, the sky turned to snow All round the day was going down slow Night like a river beginning to flow I felt the beat of my mind go Drifting into time passages Years go falling in the fading light Time passages Buy me a ticket on the last train home tonight Well I'm not the kind to live in the past The years run too short and the days too fast The things you lean on are the things that don't last Well it's just now and then my line gets cast into these Time passages There's something back here that you left behind Oh time passages Buy me a ticket on the last train home tonight Hear the echoes and feel yourself starting to turn Don't know why you should feel That there's something to learn It's just a game that you play Well the picture is changing Now you're part of a crowd They're laughing at something And the music's loud A girl comes towards you You once used to know You reach out your hand But you're all alone, in these Time passages I know you're in there, you're just out of sight Time passages Buy me a ticket on the last train home tonight Source: LyricFind Songwriters: AL Stewart / Peter White Time Passages lyrics © Spirit Music Group

Relationships- They're funny things

The last time I saw Nastia's ex-boyfriend, Brandon in person must have been sometime last summer when he came over to go swimming with Nastia at our pool. They broke up last week. Brandon saying the typical guy thing,"It's me not you, I have to work on myself." Granted, he does, but I always thought working on yourself with a partner at your side would make it easier, but that's just me. He also said, and all these, he said, she said are all second and third hand, he said she needs to grow up and I've addressed that. she does. Now Nastia is going through life all depressed, talking mono toned, you know all those, 'I've been rejected by someone feelings we have all go through. I don't know if they make us stronger, or just make us more guarded in the future when we give our love to someone again. Now here's the funny thing. Over the weekend Nastia tells me she has to be free about four PM on Saturday because she is going to the dinner. I ask, "why?" She, as she always does is cryptic, "I'm meeting someone" "who?"I ask. Well it turns out David reached out to her, she says, but I wonder, it's too coincidental. She says she blocked David a while ago after he said something that was very disrespectful, I felt. So she is going to meet David. She puts on a pair of tight jeans, and a shirt that shows her stomach. I think, "Well, she is showing him what he gave up.I guess." She drives off. About six or so, two hours later she comes home to feed the dogs and says she is going out to the mall afterwards. I ask,"why?" "I'm meeting someone?" "Who?" "David" I should have just copied and pasted the above conversation. The only difference is she is not driving, she is being pick up by David. I'm doing yardwork and I really don't want to talk to him. I know the pull of past relationship, I really do, but I do'nt want someone in her life who puts her third in his life. I've talked about that hierarchy before. So I quit weed wacking and go inside. After a while so does she, which I was glad for. Waiting outside for him is so desperate looking and it gives me flash backs to when they were going out. Eventually I go back out and I'm working as far from the road as I can get when he shows up in what looks like the same car he drove when he was dating Nastia two or so years ago. I ignore his arrival,hoping he'll do the same. A few moments later he is waving to me a few feet from me. I reluctantly turn off the weed wacker and be socialable to him. I'm uncomfortable and I can imagine so is he, BUT HE MADE THE SUPREME EFFORT TO SAY HELLO TO ME!! I couldn't have made it too much more difficult then I did. A big difference from the most recent ex. They go off and she comes back about 10:30. She says she is tired and goes up to bed. Elena, I noticed the other day has a hickey, a small one, but a hickey on her neck. And on Sunday, She bought home some clams and made them. She put some aside for Matt to come by and pick up. Yeah, I guess they're just good friends. wink,wink,nudge,nudge* *Monty Python reference /

Nastia and her boyfriend split up.

I have mixed emotions about this. I didn't think they were right for each other, but Nastia is the type of person who needs to be in a relationship. And when she is she goes full out for it. She makes most of the sacrifices. The problem with the two of them is both of them are looking for someone to take care of them. Her ex-boyfriend is a moma's boy who went to school to become a color commentator for football games. I talked once to him about football, he was very good, but the problem is almost all of those jobs go to ex-football players or coaches. He also has Joe Muller motivation. I know you'd think after the life I'd lead that would be a very impressive...now stop laughing, it's really not that funny. I am admitting to being lazy. And a lazy person can spot another one. I wasn't surprised to hear he was big into playing X-box, or whatever they play these days. I would be doing the same if I was his age.

I did hear when he broke up with her that he said she was immature. I laughed and hear the kettle calling the pot black. Yes Nastia is immature. Spend your first years of life with an alcoholic mother, then get tossed into an orphanage at around the age of four or so, while in the process, you live for a time in a mental home, then spend several year in a better orphanage where your sister finally joins you. You suffer the abuse that I'm sure your thinking happened there and finally at the age of nine years old, having spent up to that time more then half your life in these places two stranges who don't speak your language come and take you with your sister to a strange new world where you still don't speak the language to make a new life. Now twelve years later, you speak the language, but have trouble reading it. Your first relationship was with a guy who when he came to see you, at least from my prospective put you last on the list of important people in his life. His list started with his grandparent, then is Aunt and finally you. In the last year of their relationship he'd come down from Albany for the weekend and you'd get to see him on Sunday evening before he left. Her second relationship, the current ex, she would get up in the morning and go over his house to be with him. When they were out on dates and she was the one who pointed this out before I noticed, she'd pay the majority of the bill on dates. After a while she'd make excuses for him, like he has student loan debt, he's saving for a car. Yeah, all true, but you on and off were going to school, you were working part time, not full time at a most likely union job. You were making minimum wage.

I'm not angry at him for ending the relationship. I've been on both sides of the coin and know how it hurts. I was a stupid guy when I broke up with a girl and left her the key to her apartment and a note. I'm sorry I was a stupid guy back then. So I can't fault him for breaking up with her by face timing her. He's a moma's boy, just like I was and what is done is done. I feel very deeply for the pain my daughter is going through and it is a pain most everyone of us have felt. Some of us wall off our feeling and vow never to

love again, others like Nastia will recover in their own time and go out looking for the love of their lives and when she finds it, that person will be the luckiest person in the world. When she was in the orphanage back in Russia she made a decision to be happy. I don't imagine ever being able to make that decision under those circumstances,if ever, but she did and she remains that happy person. The man who eventually loves her will receive that love back a thousand time over from her. She is an amazing, strong, loving person. Oh, God, she is a gift. /

Bowling Dinner

COVID over the last two years has caused a lot of loss. Our family has been very lucky and escaped the worst of it. The most we've endured is the girls and Teri having to take a COVID test when they were told they'd been exposed or came down with cold-like symptoms. All three have taken the test and they've come back negative, thank God. Tests and shots are plentiful these days. At the beginning of the pandemic before shots and tests were available, it was scary. This is the second time we have tried for normal. The first time we thought it was over, all the smart people had gotten their shots and the dumb ones were getting sick and dying while still proclaiming it was all a hoax, That time all the smart people doned their masks again, except for the stupid politians, like Ron DeSantis who thought they could score political points over the common good of the nation. Pardon me for a moment, I have to step off my soap box and it’s a little more difficult these days….Ok, where was I… ah yes I wanted to talk about the bowling dinner, wait, wait, don't go, I’m also going to talk about drugs. Yes, I wait for you to gather back around… ready, ok.

This past Wednesday was the first bowling dinner in two years. Last year on the last day of bowling everyone gathered around some tables at the bowling alley and trophies were handed out. It wasn’t great, but you know COVID was making a comeback. This year with consistent rumors of new variants it was a little bit of a surprise when we were informed we were having a bowling dinner. We didn’t even have a Christmas buffett. So Nastia and I picked up Jessie and arrived at La Terraza in New City just before six. Nastia and Jessie said they’d meet me inside and when they did they smelled like, well lets just say it’s legal now in New York, I think. I haven’t purchased a drink at a bar in many years. I’m waiting at the bar to get a screw driver, you know a simple vodka and orange juice. I’m fingering a ten and a five thinking which I should give the bartender when he gives me my drink. I decide on the ten, I figure less hassle, he’ll give me change. I hand him the ten and turn my back to talk with Nastia. The bartender lets me know he needs more money. So like an ass-hole I can sometimes be, I said loud and clear, “I guess you can tell what generation I’m from” and handed him five more. I take my drink and talk about the cost of drinks with a fellow bowler, who will laler buy me a drink. Very nice of him.

Nastia, wants a shot of 43, a liquor I introduced her to last year and she forgot her ID. I go to the bar to tell the bartender she only looks 12, but is really 23. He picks that time to be an ass-hole back to me and he gives me a speech about how he is not going to risk the alcohol license of this establishment, blah, blah, blah. I was past the jerk moment I caused, I guess he wasn’t. I paid for the alcohol and that was it for ordering from him. All future drinks came from the waitress who was so nice, I left her a tip at the table. Dinner was buffett style so you got to choose from all the different meals offered, which was really nice, I liked that. A salad and fried calamari with cookies for dessert rounded out the meal. Trophys and some money was handed out. A volunteer was requested, so I put up Nastia's hand. She pick out fifty-fifty tickets from the league to win envelops with varying degrees of money. Nastia picked one for $80,.00 for her and then picked one for $100.00 for me. That was awful nice of her. It was a nice night that was over by 9 PM. Nastia wanted to stay out with some of the younger people in the league, I didn’t, but we stayed for a very little while. Jessie was dropped home and it was a nice night.

A Thursday visit to NYC to see Harry Potter and the Cursed Child.

For Teri's birthday, the girls and I gave her four tickets to Harry Potter and the cursed child. Back in February, Gabby at work told me Broadway was celebrating Broadway week for the month of February and she was going to see a play, I don't remember the name. She comes back the next day saying she had a great time. It reminded me how much I love Broadway. I used to go quite often. I hadn't bought tickets for a show for many years. THe last two shows I've seen, The book of Mormon and Jersey Boys, Teri bought. I purchased the tickets and thought March 3rd, a Thursday is a good night to go. After a few days, I decided to change the date of the tickets when I discovered that the tickets for April are ten dollars cheaper and I could give them to Teri for her birthday.

On Monday, the weather for Thursday is not looking very good. It is supposed to start raining on Wednesday,and rain on and off for the next two days. Wednesday, the rain clears late in the day, but comes back over night. Thursday morning is overcast, but dry, at least until about midday. The Yankees home opener has been canceled even before Thursday has dawned, but I remained hopeful. Teri has a doctor's appointment which would bring her home about four. I am getting out of work early and would be home by four. The girls have both taken the day off from work. Nastia has school and her boyfriend will drop her home around three.

The Curtain goes up at seven at the Lyric theater, plus we are a little short of money, so we will eat at home. Everyone is warned to eat at home. The girls and I have hot dogs, a sign of spring for me, and Teri has soup. we are ready to leave a few minutes after five. I'm thinking we'll end up standing in front of the theater for forty minutes waiting for it to open and someone will have to go. I'm determined it won't be me so I have stopped drinking anything as of three.

On a good day, you know March of 2020, high COVID you can get to the city in twenty minutes. I've gone to the city in an hour, hell, I used to be a salesman and occationally I worked in the city. I haven't been in the city much in the last eight years. Before this it was Christmas 2019, maybe when we went to see the tree. The weatherman's (or is it person in these thin skinned days) prediction for rain is, as the British would say, spot on. It's not cats and dogs, that will come later, but it is coming down. I have been married to Teri for twenty-seven years. When we talked about going to Hawaii for our twenty-fifth it seemed far away. Now it's in the past. In all of those years I've learned several things important about Teri. First and formost she is an awful passenger. I would rather let her drive if I could. II enjoy driving and I enjoy driving most of the time in the city. With all of that in mind, oh, yes Teri doesn't enjoy driving in the city or in the rain. The short of it is I'm driving, Teri is not, it's raining and she is not going to enjoy the trip, but I'll try.

I pull out driving Elena's car. She has a nice car, a Honda CRV. We are using it because there might be an extra charge for SUV's parked in garages. The gas tank is full and I'm taking it slow. The rain patters against the windshield, I'm a little tense, but life is good and we are on an adventure. I make a needless turn onto New Lake road in Valley Cottage because Teri doesn't like that hill on Storms road. I take Rt 303 all the way down into Orangeburg, then the on ramp for the Palisades, I'm driving the prefered route that Teri likes. We first hit traffic at the toll booths for the George Washington Bridge. All of us are a little shocked at the sixteen dollar price for the bridge. We inch our way toward the bridge. Traffic breaks a little on the bridge and we make a little time crossing. We have an hour to get to West forty-third. We'll park on forty-forth and walk around the block.

The West side is slow, but it moves. Rain continues to fall. I wait to make a left until I hit the forty-forth street exit. I remember when they were taking down the elevated expressway back in the 70-80's and what a mess it was. I'm driving into the city remembering it when Mike Bloomberg ran it. The last eight years and COVID have changed it. It feels like the 80's. Garbage piled on the sidewalks, cars blocking cross streets. I tell Teri this, she thinks I'm over reacting, I don't, it's not the same city. We get stuck at Tenth Avenue as car going down town will not leave an opening for the cross street (Where are the Police to keep it open??) I make a frustated turn to the right, the first rash decision and the first time Teri has seen my city driving. I dial it back down looking for a left to make to get back on course. A few streets late we are south of where we want to be and running out of time. I make a right onto fortieth street and we locate a parking garage. We are a few blocks south of the theater, it's in walking distance. Rain is light, but bearable

We arrive at the theater with fifteen minutes to spare, the rain has stopped. Well in time, I think. I forget about the COVID protocols the theater district is still using. We arrive at the theater looking at the head of the line. We start walking and wewalk and we walk. As we are waking I remember I read that the Lyric theater was build in something like 1904 and seats about 1600 people. I think 1550 people must already be in line. It does move pretty quickly. They have been praticing this seven days a week for a while. Vaccine card, license. bag check and finally ticket check.

Inside the theater, it is beautiful. We walk past the bar and the refreshment stand. The voice of Julie Andrews in in the backround telling us we only have two minutes until curtain. I hate being late for the curtain. A quick bathroom stop and we make our seats. We are two seats off the isle and twenty-two rows back. THey are good seats, but not great seats. Great seats would have cost alot more. I'm just happy to be here on this wet Thursday evening at seven O'clock. The curtain goes up. When there is a lul in the action on the stage people are let in to take their seats. Some are quit, other are noisy like the people of to the right of us, in front. Have a little respect people!!

The play used to run over two nights. Post COVID it as been shrunk down to one night, three and a half hours. The story is about the possibility that Voldamore had a child and the lives of Harry, Ron, Herminie and Ginny and their kids twenty years after the defeat of Voldamort. I can see what used to make up the first night of the play.It is the first years Albus and his friend spent at Hogworts. It is quickly high lighted and we are moved on to the second night quickly. It seems people are starting to believe Voldamort had a child and some believe Draco Malfoy who had trouble having a child used a time turner to go back in time and did something, maybe Voldamort is the father. Harry and his youngest son don't understand each other and Albus has made friends with Draco's son whos is as lost as Albus.

As much as I don't approve of JK Rawlings any more, she is still a very good writer. The stage craft where charactors go back in time and it looks like the whole stage vibrates and a sound wave makes the scenary move are amazing. I'd really like to know how they do it. At intermission one of the girls ask, "Is that it?" I say "no, it's just half time" Teri goes toward the bathroom. Nastia grabs my shirt at the arm and guides me toward where the bar and concessions are. Elena follows behind. They are both hungry. I warn them the concessions are going to be expensive. I point out the bar and get a no and then I point to the refreshment area. The three of us get on a short line and they are introduced to $12.00 popcorn and $6.00 bottles of water. Now neither of these items are huge. The water is maybe twelve ounces and th epopcorn is maybe a liter. But they are hungry. I pass, I don't want to spend the money. I head toward the rest rooms after guiding the girls back to the seats. I have to remember their only other time at the theater was the Lion King and that has to be ten years ago and I'm sure they don't remember it. I head toward the men's room with Julie Andrews in the backround telling everyone four minutes until curtin. I see Teri on line. She waves and asks if I can get her a water. I make a u turn and head toward the concession stand again. It was a quick trip and I'll also get her a white wine at teh bar I have so much time. Back at the concession stand, the line is long and slow and Julie Andrews is saying two minutes until curtain. People paying the cashiers are slow and not organized. I change plans and pick up a popcorn and a water for Teri, not wine. I'm at the cashier, Julie Andrews is telling me to hurry the F@$k up, it's almost curtain. I'm orgainized it takes only seconds and I'm off to my seat. I met Teri on my way to the seats. We disturbe the two people in the isle seats and are seated. Julie Andrews is saying it is about time, the curtain is going up.

In the dark past when I used to go to the theater alot, I'd enjoy walking down to the front of the theater to see the stage up close. This time I didn't get the chance. Curtain rises and the play continues. I look over at Elena and Nastia, both are glued to the stage and are really enjoying the play. I hope this starts something and they go to Broadway in the future. I also hope they can afford it. I forgot to say when looking for tickets I checked out the Musicman with Hugh Jackman and Sutton Foster, tickets were $700.00 a seat mid orchestra. Tickets for tonight are lower and further back, but are still $240.00 a seat.

Like any wonderful night the show has to end. It is a great show and I start to stand up to clap. I hear Nastia say me should leave now. I'm a little pissed that she doesn't want to show the cast some apprication, but I've also forgotten this is their first time at a play in ten years and don't know better. I struggle to stand up. My bad knee and seats designed for small people make it difficult. I clap as each group of cast members appear on the stage and bow. A single cast member appears on stage asking for donations to the Broadway cares. Elena is asking something and I can't hear. I tell her to shut up. I regret it as some as I say it and tell her I'm sorry. I feel real bad and don't want to ruin this night. It's about 10:45, Teri want to hit the rest rooms once more and I'm following with Nastia and Elena when Nastia realizes she has lost her boyfriends Atlanta Falcons hat. It's no big loss, it's still teh wrong team on the hat, but we go back for it. I tell Elena towait for her mom. Back at the seats there is no hat. Nastia gets down on hands and knees, still no hat. We leave the empty theater going to find lost and found when we hear someone talking about losing something and do they have it. We head to the small group and the hat is recovered.

We find each other at the stairs for the restrooms, work our way out the doors into the weather. It is raining again or is it still at this point. It's not too bad. We stop to take a few pictures and we head off in the direction of the parking garage. I'm in the lead. I pride myself on my sense of direction, it is usually very good. We arrived at the theater for a certain direction and are leaving in that direction, everything is good, but the stores don't look familar. We walk through Time Square and I remember it in the backround when we parked, so it should be good. I stop and ask for a picturewith the Hard Rock Cafe in teh backround. The rain is not bad and everyone complies. The rain starts to get harder and I'm having more doubt we are heading in the right direction. I start to get flash backs to when Teri and I went to Philadelphia for the day and spent a couple of hours getting to our car bacause I walked us in the wrong direction. I stop and check the ticket for the parking garage. I put the address into my phone and I realize we are heading in the slight wrong direction. The rain is getting heavier. We continu on, it rains even heavier, it finally reached cats and dogs heavy. We stop under a large portico and get out of the rain. Teri asks if we are heading in the right direction. I tell her yes. It's Nastia and I in the lead, Elena and Teri bring up the rear. We are soaked, so even if God is throwing buckets of water at us now we are going onward. We turn onto 40th and the end of our journey is in sight. Nastia and I have gotten ahead of Teri and Elena. I'm so focused on the garage that I am even out pacing Nastia. I don't care. I want to get to the car and pay for it so when everyone arrives the wait is short, or so I tell myself. I pay for the car. Nastia turns the corner into the garage. We wait for the guy to get our car. A few moments later Teri and Elena arrive. It is still pouring. We wait in an empty garage for our car. I have fifteen dollars in my hand to give the guy. After a while I take a five away. We are still waiting. An Uber driver on a bike comes in and a guy gets on the car lift with him and goes up, we are still waiting. I'm considering taking the ten away and giving the five when the lift show up with our car. I hand him the ten and we get in.

There is always a comfort getting into your car when you've been out in the city. Tonight, even more so. I slowly drive to the garage door and flick on my wipers as we hit the rain. I make three right hand turns and head toward the Westside Highway. I have trouble seeing the white lines and I resist saying this is 1980's New York. On the Westside the rain is still hard and we splash through the occational puddle. Across the G.W. Bridge all is well. It's almost midnight. I decide to get off at the 303 exit on the Palisades. Rt 303 seems more direct to home. The rain has cloesed Rt, 303, back on the Palisades. Teri said it would be better to go to the thruway and this time I listen to her. Back at home it's 12:30, maybe later and I'm the last one getting into bed. It's been a night of memories that I hope everyone will remember for a lifetime. /

A Day together with the family.

It was not planned, it just happened. Nastia's last weekend before she goes back to Stop and Shop over the weekends and Elena, for some reason had Sunday off. She keeps saying they are cutting hours because business is slow. So here we are all four of us off together on a Sunday. Teri buys pizza dough Saturday to make pizza fret Sunday morning. Teri and I bring down one of her special bowls. I've talked about them before, some of them she got from her mother and are precious and others she bought becausee they look like the ones she has. We drop the pizza dough into the cold bowl and I put the bowl on the stove far from the heat lamp so she won't acuse me of cooking the dough. So she complains that the bowl is on the edge of the stove vent and will fall over and break. Can't win sometimes. She takes the bowl and puts it off to the side of the heat lamp on the shelf over the stove. Later I notice it is not rising, so I move it closer to the light. By 11 that night it has risen beautifuly and I turn the light out. The next morning I take out the cast iron frying pan to make pizza fret. I've said it dozens of time, but I'll say it again. I love cast iron, there is something about it that I can connect to, something about the past, something about how once you get it seasoned, I don't know, I just love it. And I'm sure Teri and the girls just see some very heavy pans that daddy loves. I set up pizza fret and I use the cast iron. I know Teri likes to use the non stick 14 inch pan, but it is more like a gonna stick pan and it is on the list of things to be replaced. I hope I'm not on that list, well I know I'm not on my list, gotta check Teri's list. Sorry, thinking outloud. Teri will comment later that the pizza fret don't taste like Dad's and maybe it was because of the cast iron. I take a tiny bit of the dough to see if the oil is hot when Teri walks in asking if I'm making a test pizza fret (she makes test meatballs all the time when we have spaghetti and meatballs, italian thing, I guess. I could go on and on about the culatural shock I went through when I'd grown up on my mother's meatballs and then started dating italian girls and all they went through or their mother's went through to make meatballs. My mother's were just beef, egg, bread crumbs and some spices. I know italian meatballs are just adding pork, but there is so much more to it than that.) I let Teri take over and stand back to watch and assist. I go up stairs and wake both girls up telling them their mother is making pizza fret and to come help, you know mother/ daughter bonding thing. Elena is not a morning person. Alot of that has to do with tha fact she stays up to all hours of the night. I go to her first. I tickle her ear. I get the slits of her eyes opening, I know I'm in trouble, so I make it quick. "your mom is making pizza fret, why don't you go help." She reply is not nasty, but it is also not friendly, "I have my alarm set for eleven." I figure, what the hell and go to wake up Nastia. Nastia said to me one day years ago that she decided to be a happy person and that is why she is like she is. And yes she is a happy person. I walk into her room tickle her ear, then her nose, her elbow, she is in the deepest of sleeps. I check to make sure she is breathing, she begins to stir, stretch and I get some eye balls from the opening eye lids. I tell her her mother is making pizza fret and she should come down and join in. I will go up a second time to wake them up and I think it is the third time I go to wake them up when it's all cooked and ready to eat that I am cold and a little pissed that they did not get up to join in. We all sit down to breakfast. It sounds to me that Elena is being very pissy and I'm not happy that it took three time to wake them up, so I keep quiet. I don't want to ruin breakfast. Later I'm asked why I'm quiet and I say Elena is being miss cranky pants and all three disagree. Then the three 'ladies' talk about the length of their most recent crap, I kid you not. I'm done eating thank god. They are not talking about how long it took but how long it was. Women can be disgusting sometimes. I'm sorry this is a subject I never felt the desire to talk about. Breakfast is done and clean up is quick. I clean the last of the oil out of the large cast iron pan and Nastia wants to clean it. I tell her it doesn't need to be washed too much if nothing is sticking to it. I still can't just rub it clean. I need to lightly soap and water it. Then it must be dried over a flame to make sure it is completely dry and will not rust. I carry the pan to the sink, Nastia washes it. I then carry it to the stove and turn on the flame. Now why doesn't she like this pan? I think because it weighs almost as much as she does. We have tickets for Morbius at the movies at 3:30, all five of us, yes Nancy is coming too. We don't see her so much now that she has moved into the condo. /

Teri's birthday at Maggiano's and a visit to Nyack Hospital

Saturday March 26th was Teri's birthday. A week earlier she had a stomach problem and she was not able to eat for most of the week. Back in January, I'd asked Nancy to get me the phone numbers of Kimmie and Katie. One Sunday in February, I saw Teri's phone unattended on the kitchen table. I knew her password, just like I know Nastia's and Elena's

passwords,hehe, he (that's just a little evil laugh, I don't look at their phones, check out their texts, look at their pictures...that they know of, really I don't...really!) I check where she phone turns on to so I can go back there. Are there any pages she has open (really I don't go on anyones phones.), quickly I move over to her phone book. In my other hand I have my camera on my phone ready. (No, really I've never done this before.) I need, Kimmie, Katie, and Sallyann's phone numbers. I go in alphabetical order so its quicker. I take several pictures of each number to make sure they are not blurry. I click the pages I visited closed and make sure they are not open in the tabs. I turn the phone over as I place it down so if she comes looking for it before it goes blank, she won't know I've touched it. (NO, really now, I've never done this before.)

I wait until later in the evenings to make most of my texts. Usually Teri is asleep on the couch while we watch TV. I check to make sure my phone is on silent. I glance over at Teri and start my first text. I'm nervous, you know because I've never done this before. I remember back in the olden days when I wanted to throw Teri a birthday party how Sallyann and Nancy told me it needed to be done early, so people could make sure they had the time free. So here it is late on a week day night, six or so weeks before Teri's birthday I start. I pick one person to start with, I think I picked Katie because her name was on top of the list. I text her inviting her to dinner on March 26th for Teri's birthday. I forget to invite Art. I will circle back to him later when I realize that and invite him. Teri is in a place in her life where she needs the important people in her life around her to spend time with. So I invite Kimmy, Katie and Art, Sallyann and Kenny, Sallyann asks if Katie can come. I ask her to wait because I don't know how large this is going to get. I'm fearing more people will want to invite kids. When no one asks, I tell Sallyann yes, Katie can come. At one point we are a party of twelve. Then Amanda says she can't come, then Art says he would rather not go and finally a few days before the 26th Sallyann says Katie is sick and she will most likely not make it.

The party is in doubt up until the last few days even without all of the cancelations. About ten days before her birthday Teri is having severe stomach pains. It gets so bad that on Wednesday she goes to City MD in Jersey. They tell her she has spikes in her EKG and needs to be rushed by ambulance to Pascack Valley Hospital. She says no, she'll drive to Nyack Hospital. They warn her not to. She calls me at home, it is a little after seven, I've just finished making dinner.She tells me what is going on and I meet her at Nyack hospital. At Nyack Hospital they run tests, give Teri an I V to rehydrate her, run an EKG and then we sit, or I sit and she lays down in the bed. I'm not very good at doing hospitals. And yes I know everyone is saying no one is good at doing hospitals, but the difference is I can't hide it. There were times that night I wondered what life would be without her if this all went the wrong direction. I know we all die at some point, but it can't be tonight, please. Teri several times asks me what is wrong or tells me I can go home, but I can't. I remember back to her gallbladder surgery and how unfeeling she felt I was because I had planned to go back to work as soon as her surgery was over. My excuse then was I'd never been in that position before and I didn't know how to do it. This time I tried to be better. A few days later at Teri's birthday party I will joke that the only thing worse then the pain she was in that night was me being there to offer support. No one laughed, I guess you had to be there. The tests start to come back and it is looking better. She is given Maylox and some pills. It seems to be a severe case of acid in the stomach. She is told to follow up with a couple of doctors about somethings and a little after two in the morning we are told we can go.

Now I'm sure you are wondering what happened to the girls? I told Nastia I was meeting her mother in Nyack for some tests. I was very vague. She did call around ten or so and I told her we were waiting for the tests to come back, which we were. I think Elena is called or texted that her mom was in Nyack and we would be home late and that satisified her. I definately wouldn't call them uncaring, but like me back when Teri had her gallbladder surgery, they didn't know how to act and we kept them in the dark about it so they wouldn't worry. At Teri's birthday dinner they were told what happened, so next time will be more difficult. That was Wednesday, about ten days before her dinner at Maggianno's. She still couldn't eatas of th eMonday before her birthday on Friday so I texted everyone letting them know what was going on and that I might have to cancel. As the days went by Teri got better very slowly. The Tuesday before her Saturday birthday dinner she was supposed to go out to dinner with the work people and doesn't. I'm thinking this is not good. Finally, I think on Thursday Teri says she wants to go to Maggianno's for her birthday. I send the word out it is on. Friday Sallyann texts me that her daughter is sick and most likely won't be able to go. She is really sorry and, well what can you do. The once overly big party of twelve has shrunk to seven. I call and lower the reservation to seven. Friday night at three minutes after twelve, I wish Teri happy birthday, She reply is, "Oh Fuck , yeah"

The day of her birthday she goes out to grocery shop and I make sure the girls and I are ready to leave at four. We have a reservation for five I am hoping to meet Kimmie and Katie there at the reservation desk before we sit. We are in the car at maybe ten minutes after four, well too early, but early makes Teri happy. I go into a short speech about how after knowing Teri thirty years as of this November I have learned a few things about being on time and being prepared. Along about that time Nastia asks me if I have her mom's birthday card, I don't. Everyone laughs. Teri allows me to drive to Maggianno's. Teri is not a good passenger and it is her birthday. So half jokingly I ask her how she wants me to go. She says, "Thruway" On the Thruway I get in the middle lane and I am pacing the car in front of me. I am not speeding, I'm going maybe sixty. The space in front of me is quite large. After a while she thinks I'm messing with her and in a laugh says for me to pick up the pace. In New Jersey I'm in the left lane making a left turn on to a two lane road. I make it wide figuring to get into the right lane and cut in front of someone making the left from the lane next to me. He is in the right, I am wrong. After a little while I joke that one of her presents was a relaxing ride to the restaurant and I guess I'll need to get her another present.

We early to the restaurant. Kimmie and Katie are not there. I go the the front desk and tell them who we are and that all of our party is not yet here and to take their time. We wait and wait. No Katie and Kimmie. We are told our table is ready. Teri see it is set for seven and we are five. Elena asks aren't we going to wait? I give her a look. The server comes over and asks if we want drinks as we wait for the rest of our party. I give up and confess to Teri Kimmie and Katie are coming. Sallyann sends her regrets, Katie is sick. A little while later I wave Kimmie and Katie over to the table. Teri gets to pick what food we are to eat tonight, we are doing family style. There is a limited variety of food that is shared by everyone. Teri with consultation from the rest of the group orders a salad, two appetizers, two pastas, two meats and two desserts. Oh, at the meats I'm told to order the two meats I choose Chicken Marsala and Chicken parm. Teri says we can have parm at home choose picatta, which was my second choice. Course after course come and we eat. Nastia eats alot of bread. I remind her what is coming and leave her alone. She will eat a pretty good meal. Teri eats like she hasn't eaten in several weeks and she doesn't feel sick from it. Nastia goes off to teh bathroom and after she comes back the staff at Maggianno's comes over and anounces it's someones birthday and the y sing to her. Teri and I usually don't like that, but other times what are you going to do. The world is good and the food is good. Then we are done eating. I pay the bill. Teri, Kimmie, Katie and Nancy talk. The italian side. The rest of us mostly sit and listen or go on our phones. After an hour and a half they do stop. And decide it's time to go home. We arrived at five, started to eat around five-thirty and it id now after nine. It was a really good night with most of the important people in Teri's life that she needed to be around and talk with.I think she is happy. She does thank me later, no not in that way, but that would of been nice too. /

Bike riding or not, Drinking and talking

Nastia invited me to go bike riding with her on Sunday. I've wanted to bike ride to exercise for a while now. A few years ago I want to get a bike, but never did. The weather on Sunday, a very late Winter day, felt almostlike a spring day. The temperature was warm and bike riding seemed like a good idea. Nastia and I go out and uncover the bike. It's been two years since anyone went bike riding. Hard to believe COVID has stolen two years from everyones life. Little things you didn't realize had been taken. Comfort, a bike ride on a warm late winter day. Too much has been lost. A few things have changed over the last two years and some have not. Alot of things are like riding a bike, you just get on and pedal, except I've never been this old before. We clean off the bikes, put air in the tires and I adjust the seat and hand tighten the loose brake pads on the bike. It's time to go riding. Nastia asks if Elena's bike will be big enough for me. Always over confident when riding a bike (you know just get on and pedal) I say of course. I sit on the seat, then a strange thing happens, I have to jam my foot onto the upper pedal. I'm thinking, ok, all I have to do is push down and get going and all will be fine, no I'm pushing with my bad knee and biking is

over. I tell Nastia I'm sorry and go inside. Nastia calls Elena to invite her biking when she gets home.Some how when Elena gets home she goes bike riding without Nastia. She then in the dark and cold decides to wash the two years of dust and grime off her bike. It's early, the first day of Spring and it is cold outside at this hour. Nastia decides to go to a comedy club in Nyack with her friend JJ. She asks Elena if she wants to join them after her automotive class is over. She agrees. I'm asked to drive them there. It's ok, I enjoy listening to them talk, or if there is no talking, just being with them. Nastia was introduced to Nyack by Amanda. Nyack isn't the sweet, comfortable downtown I remember back when Teri and I lived there. Alot of people have discovered the town and ruined it. Even more builders have discovered it and have changed it forever. I'm thinking of you building on the corner of Midland and Main. It shades the street like never before and it's too close to the road. I wonder how much the pay off was? Elena gets home around 8:30, class was shortened because the teacher was not feeling well. Even now everyone's first thought is still is it COVID? Nastia is at JJ's in New City off of New Hempstead Road. I pick them up and miss the Palisades entrance, so again we go the long way. It's almost nine by the time I drop them off. On the ride over, Nastia is all goofy acting and as they get out of the car I tell Elena to keep an eye on the wasted one. I thought I could smell it on her. She says she will. Nastia has class at ten and JJ work at 9:30 the next day. I offer to pick them up, I don't remember if there was an answer. I'm home before 9:30, but it's late, Teri's tired and before I know it I'm watching repeats of Better call Saul, while anticipating the last season of it in April. Around quarter to eleven or so I text Elena and Nastia asking them if they have any opions about leaving. Elena says she'll ask. It goes back and forth for a little while and it looks like I'll get Elena, the other two are staying. Then suddenly all three are leaving with me. It turns out that Nastia's boyfriend, who works the late shift, this night, I think can't pick them up. So I go pick them up. Nastia gets in and says, " You told Elena to look after me, The way she was drinking, I should have been looking after her." Elena doesn't argue, I let it go. There's talk among th egirls about the comedians, one good, two bad, they saw. How one guy described by Elena and Nastia as I homeless guy who goes around begging for money wanted to take Elena to a motel room and how she shut it down immediately. I drop Nastia and JJ off at JJ's house and Elena gets in the fron seat. I don't remember how it started, but alcohol loosens lips and Elena goes and opens the book of Elena wide. The open book lands on her relationship with Matt and how she has trouble being in a relationship with anyone for more then a year. She talks about hte ups and downs of the relationship. How they met in school, were friends, dated, then were friends and finally they were dating again up until recently. She goes on into some more detail about their relationship and I feel I can't write it down. There was not big eye opening secrets revealed. It's just that I was allowed to see into her private world. I feel a little special, even if it was drunk talk and if I write about it, I'd be doing something wrong. We back into the new driveway and she comments how she hates how muddy it is and I tell her I'd meant to widen it and get more stone last summer, but I was working on her bedroom. I promised I'd take care of it this summer. We get out of the car quietly trying to not disturb the dogs.It's quarter to twelve, past curfew and Teri is asleep. We go in the back door, closing it very quietly. We are walking through the kitchen toward the dining room and the stairs near the front door when first one dog, Athena barks then a second dog, Misha start to bark. Teri's awake and not to happy. They quit down Elena goes to bed, I go to shower. Everyone is safe and I'm at peace. They went out drinking and have arived somewhere where they are safe. /

Everybody has a hickey except me, should I feel left out?

Well it's really just Elena and Nastia who have them, but should I feel left out? Elena broke up with Matt a while ago and before I found out about it she she had gotten a new hair cut. It was short, dyed red and she had it standing up. I commented that I liked the way it looked. When Teri saw it she told Elena it was too short. Then a day or so later, maybe more I find out from Teri that Elena and Matt have broken up. Over the weekend all four of us were helping Nancy move into the new condo, new to her, not new to the planet, in

Valley Cottage, when I noticed three hickeys on her neck,Elena's, not Nancy's. I start making jokes about them. I also notice they are lighter in color then previous ones, hummm. That lends a little creedence to her statements that they are old, but they weren't there before. Being the juvenile I am I make all the appropriate jokes, you know all the ones you heard in middle school. She went fishing and caught a sucker fish, she was hammering nails and the hammer bounced back and got her on the neck. There's lots more, but there all last century jokes...oh wait, I just remembered an other one...she was vacuuming and slipped. I commented later in the day to Teri about the closed book of Elena and Teri makes a surprise comment that she

know nothing about what is going on in Nastia's life and to give her this. I was very taken back (I just looked up 'taken back' and the Grammer Book defines it as a corruption of taken aback meaning to be taken by surprise, The snarky (we've talked about that word) Urban Dictionary cautions that taken back is used by semieducated morons who mean to say taken aback. I'm sorry taken aback sounds pompous, you know irritatingly grand, looked that up too.) Wait, where we're we? Oh yes, I was taken aback. Did I really use that? Well, I never considered that Teri had the in with Elena, whatever that means and she didn't have a channel to Nastia.Nastia talks to me and tells me things and I never considered that Teri didn't know them or atleast most of them. Nastia, I noticed had a small hickey on her neck on Sunday. I pointed it out and was surprised to hear that her boyfriend's family, specifically his mother didn't like seeing them on Nastia because she was afraid of what we would think. I was taken aback, damn, will I be able to stop using that phrase now!! I really didn't think they gave a damn about what we thought. I was going to write somethings and I even started to when I thought better of it. I'm not there and I don't know his parents, hell, I don't even know him, so I'm stopping. /

Saturday morning, Nastia makes Pizza fret

I was trying to spell pizza fret when Google or maybe it was the spit of Teri's mother gave a spelling suggestion. I was intrigued so I copied and pasted (boy, I'm so computer literate) and actually found a recipe for it. As the women who posted it said, it is not a recipe, but more like directions on how to do it. I'm going to take a moment to write down how Teri wants all of her decendants to make pizza fret and then I'll tell you how Nastia and I make it. Firsta, you getta the pizza dough..yeah, I'm the only one who finds that funny. You putta...ok, I'll stop, but it is funny. The pizza dough is in the freezer section at the grocery. At home you put the dough in a large bowl, Teri uses a glass bowl she has from her mother. The dough come out of the bags and is put in the bowl. It is best if it has been defrosted first. A towel is put over the bowl and the bowl is placed in a warm spot in the kitchen. Now back in the dark ages, you know, the 60's all stoves had pilot lights. A pilot light is a small flame, in the oven that always burned, that helped to light the oven when you turned it on. It is about a quarter of an inch tall and yes a waste of gas, but it kept the stove warm enough that dough would raise if you put it in the stove. Modern stoves are cold and indifferent, while older stover are warm and inviting and make the kitchen a place to hang out in. yeah, that is a little over board. Old stoves, with pilot lights were good, but just like The Sopranos, they were good, but there time has passed. Now the trick is to find a warm place in the kitchen, away from drafts and any animals, thinking dogs here, not mice or coyotes, where the dough can rise, leave it over night. If it rises you punch it down in the morning and get things together to make the pizza fret. If it doesn't rise, well go get things together to make pizza fret. I like using the giant cast iron pan I got at a barn sale several years ago. I think I've told the story several times. The night before, remember you are supposed to take the dough out of the freezer to let it defrost. Since this is Nastia's deal we are letting her do it all. She'd wanted to take the dough out of the freezer earlier, but forgot.

It's like 9 PM and she remembers. I walk in doing something and she comments she forgot to take the dough out and it's still frozen solid so she's put it in warm water. I have my hands full of something so I tell her to immediately take it out of the water. She is in the process of doing that when Teri walks in and tells her the same thing. Teri gets involved helping her to dry off the dough. I think in all the commotion no one tells her why you can't put the dough in water. One of Teri's prized bowls, some are from her mother, some she found in a store and had to have, are taken carefully down and the bread raising bowl selected. It's just the one we always use to raise the dough. It's put on the rack over the stove. I put on the heat lamp, but Teri says it will cook the dough. Recently Teri and I had a rough 'talk' about how to make pork chops so I let it go. Dough needs warmth to rise. In February, in our house at night, in the kitchen with poor heat, it ain't gonna rise. The next morning, Teri isn't feeling well so Nastia, with my oversight makes pizza fret. I tell Nastia, her mother likes the big formerly non-stick pan (time for a new one), but I like the cast iron. I take the cast iron out and she pours some oil in it. It takes a few minutes to warm. Nastia checks the oil by flicking with her fingers some water into it. I pull some dough off and start to make pizza fret. I make the first and soon Nastia is doing it all.

I step back against the sink and watch her made pizza fret. At certain times Nasti's arms are just not long enough. She's always been sensative to pain. So she over reacts, in my opinion to bees and the possibility of getting stung, see her Ford Escape for details back two, three years ago. So when she has to put the dough in the hot oil her arms are not long enough and her sleeves are too short to cover her arms and hands even though she tries. I watch, take pictures but do not interfer. This is growing up. Cooking and accepting that sometimes the oil is going to get you. Teri comes in, feeling a little better, I guess and says, You're doing it all wrong, they're too thick. Nastia tells the truth saying, this is the way daddy told me to make them. Teri says, "americano" which translates into, all together, "AMERICAN!!" really, (tongue in cheek) what the hell is she?? But, also she is right, they are too thick. She and Nastia work together making the last half or so of the pizza fret, a nice mother daughter moment. They don't get along as well as they should. They remind me of my brother Karl and my dad how they'd fight all the time. But for now there is peace and it is nice. I wonder if they noticed? I woke Elena before we started making pizza fret, inviting her to join us. She politely declined and went back to sleep reminding me to wake her when breakfast is ready. Yeah, I know, but she is such a pleasant person when forced to get up early and it's about that time of the month. So put them together and let her roll over and go back to sleep so we'll all be happier. Teri yells from the bottom of the stairs and Elena comes down. She is in an extra snarky* mood and it is mostly directed toward her sister. Nastia reacts like any sister would to her little sister being mean. The four of us sit down at the table. A plate of pizza frets are surrounded by butter, cinnanon and sugar and a large selection of jellys and jams. Elena and I dig in first. Nastia is off making tea and Teri is just sitting down. We eat, talk, sometime look at our phones, until Teri gets mad and makes a snarky* comment. It's nice eating with everybody, even with all of the comments between Nastia and Elena, and occationally Teri. I eat mostly quietly, savoring the morning. snark*y- critical or mocking in an indirect or sarcastic way snarky remarks * bad tempered or irritable. Bobby's always a bit snarky before his nap. /

Elena and Matt break up??

Several days ago, maybe as many as ten days ago Elena says she and Matt are going to join a gym. Right down the street from her job is a Planet Fitness. In New City, near both of them is a Planet Fitness. Planet Fitness from what I hear is a cheap gym to join, unlike the gym, New York Sports club, I joined back in 2001 or so at the Palisade's Center that cost a hundred or so dollars a month. And you had to join for a year. I used it for a little over a year

and ended it after about eighteen months. The gym they choose to join is in Spring Valley and maybe all the future people who are reading this are asking, "whats wrong with that, Spring Valleys nice." Well Spring Valley has been going down hill for about the entirety of my life. It was the commerical capital of the county in the fifties. My mom and Dad went there when my brother and I were both born. It had everything. Then it started going down hill. I don't know what happened. It could have been the Nanuet Mall opening in 1969 or it could have been one of those things. It wasn't too bad in the 70's when I delivered milk there. And now I'm sorry to say it is not a place to go. But my daughter and Matt decided to join a gym there. I just looked up where it is and I am very familar with the area. I used to have several stops there when I was a

salesman for different milk companies. It's just off the corner of Rt 45 and Rt 59. It's not as bad as I was making it out to be so you can forget everything you just read. The bad parts of Spring Valley are more around, well lets just say I'd rather they don't go there at night. Well this long windy introduction brings me to the closed book of Elena. I'd really like to get to read a few pages of that book one day. I only get glimpse of words and phrases from it every so often. And recently I got a short phrase. Teri comes up to me and says that Elena and Matt have broken up. My reaction is a "Whatt??!!" She'd talked about having a dinosaur wedding when she marries him and he,...except for recently had been over every so often... but there were not fights that I'd heard or saw. Last time they had a fight she came home and went to bed. There was none of that. There was no saddness in her that is new. I felt like I'd missed something, maybe I'd not been looking close enough, I didn't know. In the days that follow I did look closer and I still saw nothing. We invited her to a movie that she would have found boring, but we did want her to be alone at home. She didn't go and when we got home she is fine. Then, I don't know maybe four or five days after they'd broken up Elena says she is heading for the gym. Ah, the

gym, I'd forgotten about the gym. Immediately I tell her she can't go alone. She in an off handed way says, "oh, Matt'll be there." The book of Elena opened for one brief fraction of a second, then slams shut. And all I can think of is...what???? /