For the nineteenth time in her life, it's Elena's birthday!!

Elena's birthday started early this morning. A few minutes to three in the morning Anetha, our white farty dog,
Teri's favorite child, the one who sleeps on the bed up against Teri's leg and almost pushes her off the bed, for some reason decided she needs to sleep at the head of the bed next to our heads. I wake up and push her away. She tries it again a few moments late and again I push her away. I see Teri's phone light up across the room and think maybe she is scared of this so I go over and flip them over. I get back into bed. By now Teri is awake and she starts to pet Athena. Things seem to calm down a little when two people walk down the street, I guess the bars were closing. I get up to pee and when I come back Athena has stretched out in my spot and pushed the cover all up in a pile. I not to kindly shoo her back down to the bottom off the bed. Now Teri has to go and when this happens all the dog want to go too. Teri leads them outside and I wait sitting on the bed with a headache. It's the best way for me to get rid of this type of headache, I slept in a bad position and have a bad neck. Teri doesn't come back so I go downstairs. She is sitting in the chair in the living room saying she can't sleep now and I should go back to bed,which I do and of course I can't sleep either. Nasita passes the door and goes to the bathroom. Finally I fall asleep after four or so.
     I wake up several times during the morning and finally get up around eight. Teri and I go in to wake up Elena to wish her a happy birthday. I want to annoy her to consciousness. Teri the nice parent doesn't want her to wake up grouchy. Elena wakes up as we are discussing it. Teri then proceeds to torture her by singing happy birthday to her, She wakes up happy. I offer to get her a birthday bagel or I will warm up an egg sandwich. She chooses a birthday blueberry bagel with butter.
      Last night Nastia says she has a UTI and she has to go to the doctor. Elena quips Nastia should keep her hands out of her vagina to avoid a UTI.
      Nastia is also now awake and she declines an Elena birthday bagel. I go get Elena's bagel so she can eat before the two of them go to the Immediate Medical Care in Nanuet. They are being adult about this. Teri and I both are liking it.
      Elena eats and they leave. About a half hour later Nastia calls saying they won't take our insurance because it is out of New Jersey. This infuriates Teri who then has a select few works about it while pointing out if we lived in New Jersey and got sick in New York they still wouldn't take it?
       It might cost Nastia up to $200.00 for the visit. We'll submit it to the insurance company and see what happens. They are gone for an overly long time and Teri calls them reminding them that we are supposed to be to the mall by 2 pm. I try reminding Teri it is Elena's birthday and it really doesn't matter. 
       It is agreed we will go to Dave and Busters at 2pm. Teri goes off to pick up Nancy and I am left to take the girls to the mall. Jessica will get there on her own. I have some time and I didn't sleep real well last night, so I take a short nap. At 10 to 2 I get up, get the girls and Elena drives my car over to the mall. Knowing how Teri is about being on time I should have gotten up a little earlier because we are late. It doesn't make any difference in the grand scheme of life but to Teri being on time can be a big thing. She feels that if you are on time for the little things, then being on time for the big things will come easy. She is right, but sometimes it really doesn't matter.
       At Dave and Busters I go through all the cards I have collected over the years. When I used to go there regularly I had accumulated quite a few points. I find the card. It has twenty-five thousands points on it. I put it aside. I collect the cards with points on them and left over credits. I put some money on three cards and have two or three cards left with a few credits on them incase someone runs out early. Teri, Nancy and I go sit at a table and prepare to order lunch. It's not going to really be lunch, it's more of a snacky thing. I order nachos, Teri orders a combo dip plate, Nastia orders hot dogs wrapped in pretzel dough and Tater tots. Elena orders a massive burger with fries and a drink with an electric ice cube, it's really cool and weird. Jessica a smaller burger. Nancy orders a philly cheese steak. No one finishes their meal. All the appetizers are huge and the bill is a little larger than I'd hoped. With tip its $135.00.
       After food the girls go about playing games. It starts to get loud and Teri says she has to leave. She and Nancy head to Macy's. A wander around play a game or two with the girls and they decide it's time to cash in their tickets. They won only a handful. I add up what is on all the card except mine. It comes to about 3,000 tickets. If I add in what has been on my card for the last decade it amounts a little over 28,000 tickets. If they can find something good I will add my tickets in so they can get it.

     
We walk into the prize area and there is the usual crap. I look around on the top shelves and what I see is not spectacular. There is an XBox game for 100,000 tickets. Elena finds a bluetooth speaker she wants Nastia is picking out crap to just have. She wants a remote control helicopter. It makes me think it would be cool if they had drones. I don't see any. Nastia hold onto the helicopter. On the top shelf in the corner Nastia sees the drones. I take one down and they look it over. The Drone is 13,000 tickets. I go and recheck the tickets on the cards and yes I can get two drones. I ask if they want the drones and get an enthusiastic yes. I feel bad for Jessica, I just don't have enough tickets for three drones. We get the drones and head home
   

  At home the instructions say charge the battery for 90 minutes before use. So the girls head to the park to walk around. They come back home too late to use the drones. We are finishing off the day with ice cream from Dairy Queen.
      Northvale Dairy Queen is the closest, it takes at least twenty minutes to get there. We get in just before a rush, most of us ordering Blizzards. We sit outside and can feel the weather begin to change. Fall is coming sooner than any of us want. With it comes no high school, we have two college girls this year. Those thought and the cool weather put a slight chill through everybody.
       At the end of the day Elena came into the living room and I asked her if she'd had a fun day, she said she had. I told her we should try to make the next three hundred and sixty five days as fun. She doesn't seem convinced.

By the Sea, by the sea, by the beautiful sea....

By the sea, by the sea, by the beautiful sea, you and I, you and I oh so happy we'll be..... come on let's all sing it together. Really, you won't? I'll just humm it while I write.
      About six weeks ago, (by the sea, by the sea) the girls wanted to go to the beach. So after much reflection, self doubt and the realization they would eventually go on their own even if we didn't say yes we said yes they could go to the beach. (by the beautiful sea) They went had a blast and sometime around this time I think they asked us to go with them. Teri's busy season at her job is the summer so no vacations. at least for her. I won't get into it too much, it just has to do with part timers and friends of the boss who got time off. Anyway (you and I, you and I , you and I oh so happy we'll be) I started talking about going to the beach on a weekend. Teri likes to go in August and I think the week after July fourth is the best time to go. We looked over our schedules and decided that the best time to go was the first Saturday in August. Technically it was still July type weather, but it was August.
     
 The Plan was to leave early and stop for breakfast at Perkins Pancake house. The high point for me was to be Perkins. Sally Ann, Kenny and Katie were to join us along with Nancy. We left at 830. picked Nancy up in Nyack and got on the road by 9AM
    Traffic is heavy, but moving. It slows in the Oranges. Our projected time getting to the beach is late. If we stop at Perkins we won't get onto the beach until almost noon. Teri asks if we have to eat at Perkins. I say yes, then I think about how selfish I'm being for the next half hour until I finally tell Teri let's just go to the beach. She calls Nastia who relays the message and we go directly to the beach. When we get there everyone starts saying how they were looking forward to Perkins. I felt bad and angry at the same time.
   

We set up our chairs umbrellas and whatnot as always right next to the lifeguard and the high water mark on the beach. At least I hope it is. The girls, all three of them immediately go running off into the surf. I remember in my good old teenage years most girls would spend 99% of their time  getting sun on the beach, Not our girls they were in the surf most of the afternoon. Of course Nastia would complain about sand in places it shouldn't be. We settle in still I haven't eaten anything. I get a soda out of the cooler and break open the chips and settle in.
      About an hour later people complain about being hungry. I'm not looking forward to getting food on the boardwalk, but what are the choices. I don't want to go to the Beachcomber or whatever it is called that Nancy likes, so we wander on the boardwalk until someone gets tired and we settle on a pizza place. Nastia wants seafood so I go with her to a seafood place that is a sit down restaurant and we go back to have pizza. It was bad, but the slices were huge. I ordered two slices, one for me, one for Nastia and some french fries with a cheese sauce. The fries weren't to awful. The pizza I didn't finish. With a very large soda I spent $28.00. Well north of what it was worth. We sat at several tables in the back, no table being big enough for all of us and we ate.
      Back at the beach Nastia and Katie went back into the water,

Elena started digging a hole. She kept at it with the occasional side caving in until the lifeguard said there is a rule you can only dig holes up to your knee. Then her, Nastia and Katie get in the hole and we fill it in. I have a video of them trying to get out afterwards. It's the highlight of the day.
       Teri asks what time I want to leave. I say about 4-4:30, she says how about between 5-6? I say as long as it's closer to 5. At 6:30 Nastia is off buying a crab and Nancy want to get ice cream before we leave. Forgetting it's Saturday, not a week day, I'm thinking traffic will not be good

going home.
We get on the road about seven. Traffic is heavy, but moving. Around Paramus I notice a flash in the clouds to the east. I think we've missed the thunderstorms coming out of the west. The lightning show continues and gets better as we hit the Thruway going east. It ends and I think that is the end. About an hour after we are home the night sky opens up with a storm of heavy rain and lighting. A great way to end a long and sweaty day. I hope everyone had as good a time as I did. And we'll definitely do Perkins next time, I swear.   

I know this song because of  Bugs Bunny Cartoons from the 40's and 50's
"By the Beautiful Sea" is a popular song published in 1914, with music written by Harry Carroll and lyrics written by Harold R. Atteridge.^[1] The sheet music was published by Shapiro, Bernstein & Co.^[2]

The song was originally recorded by the Heidelberg Quintet, topping the early American music charts for six weeks in the summer of 1914, during the outbreak of World War I.

By the sea, by the sea, by the beautiful sea
You and I, you and I, oh how happy we'll be
When each wave comes a-rolling in, we will duck or swim
And we'll float and fool around the water

Over and under and then up for air
Pa is rich, ma is rich, so now what do we care?
I love to be beside beside beside beside beside
Beside the sea, beside the seaside, beside the seaside
Down by the beautiful sea

Elena's new bedroom

July 22, 2019 When we bought the house in 2003-4, I don't remember exactly when. I know it was November, I think, but back when we bought it we had a new heating system put in. Our heating duct guy gave us a price to run a few new ducts into the back bedroom and the forward bedroom. He tore a hole into the kitchen's south wall behind where the refrigerator was to go when we were done with the kitchen renovation and connected up the vent to the back bedroom. All the walls in the kitchen were coming down so I
only minded a little bit that he tore a hole in this wall. When he went to connect the front bedroom I couldn't let him tear into the dining room walls and connect the heating system because of a small vent a previous owner had installed. It had something to do with preserving history and the uniqueness of this house, plus we'd just put up new sheetrock, I think. I know I took down the original walls and added outlets. We completely redid the Kitchen from its 1930's or so styling, Those were thing that needed to be done to make the house livable. That vent wouldn't change any ones life, I thought. I guess life changing is a little strong. Because of a lack of insulation and only the one heating/air conditioning vent that poration of the house has always been cold. I remember one time Amanda was sleeping in the back bedroom and complained she froze one night. I went in and locked all the windows in the room and that bought the temperature of the room up into the almost comfortable

area. What all this preamble has been about is Elena wants to move into that room. Teri has agreed that Elena and I can take down the walls and ceiling, insulate and put up new walls. Elena's job is destruction and nagging. She is taking down the plaster and lathe. She'll then bag it and put it out for trash. My job is to help a little with destruction. I'm to guide and to put up insulation and finally the wall board. Elena's last job is to nag me to make sure I finish the job.
       The pictures on the left are from the first day or two of Elena taking down the plaster. Throughout the day I'd come in and immediately smell the familiar dust of falling plaster walls. Then the rhythmic pounding with small rainfalls of plaster in between. The plaster on those wall is not in bad shape and if there had been a way to insulate the walls without the foam injection method that might be hazardous to your health and Teri being sensitive to a lot of airborne things the walls come down. After the plaster, then the lathe. They are done separately so the lathe doesn't put holes in the bags and the garbageman won't take them. This is a project that will take a while. So far Elena has done all the work. There will come a time when I will become more involved, but right now it is all her and I think she really is enjoying herself.
         July 30, 2019
         Elena has worked really hard on her room. She has torn all the walls down and only the lathe and the ceiling remain. Yesterday she tore down the chimney that ran up the east wall  of the room. It would have been a beautiful accent to leave in place, but it took up a large part of what will be the closet.
       Back again to when we first bought the house. We were redoing the kitchen. The Chimney runs from just to the left of the basement door up behind where we put the spice cabinet and into Elena's room she is working on now. Back when we redid the kitchen I wanted to take it down. It was not being used and I could never see it ever being used. The builder said it would be very expensive to take down. So we built the spice cabinet in front of it. A few years later a storm knocked down the chimney to just above the roof line. We got some insurance money and took the chimney down and had a shy light put in. It brightened a very dark area of the attic.
       A few years ago I started hacking at the bottom of the chimney hoping to bring it down enough to install a  laundry chute. I got nowhere.
        Elena started taking down the chimney over the weekend. I did some Sunday night and she brought down the final six feet of it piling it nicely in one of the corners of the room. She said I could have the fun of bring it down stairs. I want to use the chimney to add to the stones patio out the back door. I want the bricks to be under all the plants I have near the house to keep the grass down.
















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The Poster comes down

Well it finally happened last night, no not that.The welcome home poster made by Amanda and Thasha finally came down.

The Poster folded on the table

       Teri and I were in the living room watching TV when Elena and Nastia came home from work. Nastia let Elena take her to work at Stop and Shop in New City. Elena's car is still broken (another story coming soon) . Elena drops her at work and then she goes to work at Pearl River ShopRite. When Elena is done she picks up Nastia and they both go to New City McDonald's for dinner at 9:30 at night.
       They walk into a cacophony of dogs barks. Elena goes from the front door to the dining room to say hello. In the dining room I hear her saying help. Teri goes, "oh, help her." I have no idea what is going on I get up out of the chair and see Elena holding the right end of the poster Amanda and Thasha put up for the party the night we came home from Russia.
        Now We all knew this day was coming, but like getting old or the end of summer you never thought it would happen so soon. It was always going to happen sometime in the future.
        The Poster was never supposed to stay up on the wall after the party. It was just something that was a reminder of the great adventure we all were on, so it was left up. When the tape became dusty and didn't stick, I added thumb tacks. During the filming of the movie, 'I think we're alone now' a Russian was working as an assistant. She points to the sign asking about it. I told her the story behind it. I expected a, "oh that was very nice of you" from her. I got an expression that said only Russian's should raise Russian kids. She then points out that the sign is spelled wrong.

The left side of the poster

        Last night the right corner torn itself loose from the thumb tack in a strong change of weather wind. Teri said it has to come down. I didn't argue, it seemed the right time. I pull the two thumb tacks from the left side and with Elena's help I gently fold it into thirds. I always thought once it comes down I'd cut it into thirds and frame it. Now that the time is at hand, I don't know if I can/will.

The center of the poster

The right side of the poster

       To me it is a piece of history that one day someone might want to touch and feel. This is something that has only as much value as you put into it. If years down the road someone's grandchildren find it and are asked about it the story can be told about how one night all the people in our lives came together to celebrate the first day in America for Nastia and Elena. 

July 4th ho humm through to July 9th their first beach day without us into the evening

I'm starting this post on July 6th 2019. Hopefully it will end on July 9th 2019 in the evening after Nastia and Elena have successfully returned from the Jersey shore. I can think of all sorts of horror stories that could befall the two of them on this trip, but like everything in life that scares you and you don't know how ironic that sounds coming from the shyest kid to ever go through school in Clarkstown, they have to be allowed to spread their wings and learn to fly if I want them to be successful and happy in life.
       Several weeks ago there was talk going around that the girls wanted to go to the shore. I ignored it, it was a while in the future. I was reminded about two week ago by their talk. This time I took notice and listened to what the plan was. Nancy was going to be the guide. The girls would drive. Now I always meant to teach them to drive on the Thruway and the Garden State and the Palisades Parkway, but there always seemed to be more important things to do. Immediately I put my foot down and said they could not go without another licensed driver. Nancy found a friend who asked if her grand daughter could come along too. That was not a problem. Things progressed smoothly from there.
       We went to Sally Ann's house for the Fourth of July. Elena had to work and couldn't/ didn't want to go.

The weather was hot and I finally got to make my jello shots, they were the hit of the party to some. I didn't have any. I didn't drink. We picked up Sally, Sally Ann's mom from Congers and with Teri driving we went up Route 9W past all the people who drove from somewhere else to spend the day at Bear Mountain State Park. It was so crowded there must have been a hundred cars parked on both the sides of the road along Route 9W. As we passed Hessian Lake at the northern end of the park all you could see were BBQ grill smoke and people. It did kind of look fun. Crowded, but maybe fun. Past the traffic circle near the Bear Mountain Bridge and it was another world. The traffic stopped, the crowds ended and the sleepy towns of the northern suburbs on a holiday weekend reappeared. Open empty roads were ahead of us and we got to Sally Ann's house just in time to see their float before it left for the parade. I gave the first jello shot to Sally Ann, she said she needed it. Twenty minutes later or so we walk up to the main road near her house to watch the parade. The temperature still hovered in the low 90's with a thick blanket of humidity around three-thirty when the parade started. We hung out and watched the parade. Three time I thought the parade had ended because we could not see any more marchers. But everytime I said lets go, more would appear far down the road. Finally after the third time I'd had enough and crossed the road to go back to Sally Ann's. The Jello shot were handed out freely to anyone over twenty and a half years old. Nastia being the twenty and a half year old who was allowed to try some. She had one and she also had a Mike's flavored drink. I forget with what, she didn't like it. There were chips and dips, hot dogs burgers, the usual BBQ stuff oh and there were Jello shots by some thoughtful person. I got some time to watch the Yankee game. Sally and I talked about her condo in South Carolina she's thinking about getting rid of.

We also talked some about my failure to get anything build in Nyack on Tony's property and how much time it took her to get her place built and how that would never fly today. We left a little after nine at night. I wanted to get home before Elena got home so she would not come home to an empty house. Nastia said she'd prefer the quiet of an empty house. I drove home because I wanted to. I was also reminded why Teri usually drives when we go somewhere. She has a hard time driving with other people these days. I can understand, I have trouble driving with her sometimes.
       We survived each other and I took her directions when they suited me and ignored her fears when I felt they were unwarranted. She wanted to go the Palisades from the traffic circle near Bear Mountain, we went that way and arrived home safely and to an already sleeping Elena.
     

 Today, Saturday the girls got up early to prove to me they were competent to drive on the Garden State. I handed the keys to Nastia and told her to drive to the Palisades Mall. We got to the mall and I told her to get on the Thruway. At eight in the morning on a Saturday the Thruway wasn't bad. She used a little help from her sister and we were on our way. I didn't know how far we'd go, but I wanted they both to drive a long distance and to experience the different things needed to survive a trip on a major road like that. Nastia exited the Thruway to the Garden State. I explained that on Tuesday all you'd have to do is go straight and get off at the  beach exit you wanted. Nastia drove steady for most of the trip. She tended to drive a little too much to the right in whatever lane she drove in. One or twice she would veer into the right lane. She was unsure about passing cars, but all and all she was deemed to be reasonably a safe driver. She went through toll booths and switched lanes to get into the correct lane to take the Garden State to the shore points around exit 129 or so. We stopped at the first rest stop to turn around, it had been about an hours ride. I went to the bathroom, Nastia got an apple and a drink, Elena said she was good. Elena took over driving, we got gas at $2.92 a gallon. Since it was my expedition, I paid for the gas. Elena turned us north and we headed for home. Elena drives more then her sister and the extra experience shows. She was more comfortable passing cars and just in general driving. She did have a tendency to occasionally drift out of her lane. I don't know if her mind wanders or if it was something else. It happened three times. As the Garden State Parkway ended Elena picks up on the correct way to go. I tell her to get on the Thruway. She says OK and then takes the exit for Nanuet, After it was too late, I pointed to her where I wanted her to be.Then I tell her it is OK, you'll learn another way to get home if the thruway is backed up.
It was a fun two hours with the girls. I hope they will be safe on their trip and I can write a glowing finish to this story on Tuesday night or Wednesday. With pictures they have taken.
7:49 AM July 9, 2019
     

Well they just left. I was getting breakfast when I heard the car start. The Escape has an exhaust issue so when it starts it's a little louder then it should be. The low rumble of the car, a few slamming doors and then the sound began to fade and they were gone to pick up Nancy and spend the day at the beach. Nancy's friend, Michele and her granddaughter filled out the cast of characters in today's epic adventure.
       Preparations for there grand adventure started yesterday. The day started rainey. That type of rain that made you almost need your wipers and when you did use them they weren't needed. Around eleven it cleared and became a nice day. It was warn, but not hot, The girls cleaned the inside of the car. vacuumed it and ran it through the car wash. I got a call around two in the afternoon from Nastia. She called to say Elena was walking home from New City. They'd had a fight over something and Elena got mad handed the key to Nastia's car to her and decided to walk. Of course no one was at fault. They'd just spent too much time together and lunch in New City was a little too much time together. I called Elena who'd by then gotten to the high school and told her to wait for her sister. She told me her side of the story and by the time she finished Nastia had found her and they both drove home together.
       Last night I went to pick up Elena whos car is still in need of repair. Nasita asked to come and we took her car so we could get gas in it in Jersey. We found a station selling gas for $2.65 a gallon. With a full tank a cooler of cold drinks, two chairs, a blanket, 50 sunscreen they are ready to go. Everything was packed this morning and now they are off. GOD KEEP THEM SAFE!   
This morning came early and a little angry. The girls got up at 7AM, They mostly had everything they needed ready and in the car. Michele, Nancy's friend showed up on time and everything was running smooth.

The world was very crooked that day.

       Last night I made the mistake of bring up Elena's car. I wanted her to have a better car and I thought it was a settled thing, it wasn't. The numbers if you ran them started to not workout. We got $1640.00 for the car repairs. The tow was $200.00, new tires were about $150.00, rimes included. That left about $1200.00. The car we were looking at was $2500.00 I thought I could get it for around $2000.00. There was a gap of $800.00 I was hoping to sell the car for about a thousand. That left little room for the unexpected. I got the unexpected from Teri. She thought Elena should just fix the car she has. Elena know the car and there is no problems with it after the repairs(hopefully). Teri and I had a loud discussion about it and after a while I quit fighting and said I would tell Chris to just fix the car. When I fight with Teri it doesn't matter if I win or not because I feel bad whatever  happens so in my daughter's eyes I must be the biggest pussy they have ever seen. It's sad but the joke is true about who has your balls after you get married. (excuse the last bit. I'm drinking and have no filter right now) So after last night's 'discussion' I thought another 'discussion' would not happen. Teri is in a job that is sucking the life out of her. It kind of is like Marcus Dairy was for me. The only difference is her income is what keeps this family going. So after last night Teri needed to vent and vent she did. She feel forgotten, unimportant, except for her paycheck. She is left out of things and there has been time where she felt she would like to just disappear completely.
       Its several hours later and the girls are home and safe. I'm sorry if I gave away the ending to the story.
     

 Nastia drove part of the way down to the beach and Elena took over to finish. They texted they arrived at 10:36. I'd asked for pictures and they sent the above left picture, a beach selfie. During the day Nancy sent a few more pictures of the girls and around 6:23 Elena announced they were heading home. We got the occasional update of where they were. They hit a little stop and go traffic and Teri texted a warning about how quickly it can stop and to be very careful. At 8:26 Elena texted they were leaving Nyack. It took them a little over two hours to drive home, not bad. Teri and I were waiting for them and met them on the front porch. Nancy's friend Michele and her granddaughter came up to shake our hand and say how much fun the trip was and how well the girls drove. It was very nice of her to do that. She even pitched in for some of the gas. Everyone was happy and arrived home safe. I could not have asked for more. After dark Elena went outside to finish setting off her fireworks. I was out with her and Nastia the previous two nights to supervise. After seeing what was allowed by the state of tighta.., I mean New York I didn't bother going out to supervise. The fireworks were very harmless. They were just fountains. No firecrackers, M80's not even roman candles. All very safe. New York is so good at keeping the stupid safe. Now if they could just save the middle class and make New York affordable again. OOOh, that sounded a little to trumpey there.

The Graduation Party Post

Early on the day of the party

The Graduation party has been in the planning stage for over two months. It started as an idea sometime in the rainy spring time as a distant idea for a time in the distant future that would only come after a real long wait and there was so much time to do things.
      When the cover for the pool was taken off in early May and the water was a dark coffee color, no milk, no problem we have time. When it rained at least one weekend day every week, that was OK, we have time and I don't think I can work two full weekend days every weekend any more. Plus who wants to. And the rain, the excessive rain every week didn't bother me, there was time for the weather to change.
     




Late May came and it was still raining. The mower broke and for two, three weeks the lawn grew like a weed with the excessive rain. Around the beginning of June with a fixed mower and a little luck the yard started to come together. The raised bed /pot (not the smoking kind) vegetable garden got planted. Tho the gardens on the north remained patches of weed (not the smoking kind) heaven. Finally progress seemed to be made.
       Then the week before the party hits and I could see all that needed to be done. There was work both Saturday and Sunday. Teri came out and power washed the chairs that had gotten stained by the fall and winter weather. Occasionally during the week a little more work would be done.
       Friday before the party I pick up Vanilla and Raspberry flavored Vodka thinking I'm going to make jello shots. Teri wants to make a Lemonade and lemon vodka drink and she says the jello shots will be a lot of work and we don't have time or refrigerator space, plus I didn't get the small cups I needed. I did remember to get the ribs I ordered from work. I get home and re-mow the lawn and put out the lawn furniture. At nine at night I am making hamburgers with the hamburger former Amanda got me for Christmas.
       On the morning of the party I'm thinking why didn't I make the party for Sunday? There is still so much to do. Teri is inside doing all the food prep and there is still dirty chairs, pool vacuuming, pool stairs to be put in, tents to get and assemble, beer to buy. The Weather is cooperating  sort of today. It is not raining, but it is hot and humid, going into the low 90's. Maybe it is a little too hot to stay outside. Good thing we cleaned the house extra good.
       Sally Ann comes over a little early to help. Teri is feeling stressed and when she gets stressed she picks on things that need to be fixed and on this day she draws me in. We have a quick nasty fight. I apologise to my mother who was helping me set up the tents. I think I tell Teri that if she doesn't relax she'll be crapping diamonds by the evening.
       Guests start appearing and most everything is done. Katie says, "Why all the stress, it's just family that's coming over." Hearing her say it I still think, I couldn't have people over, even close relatives like what today is if the house and yard weren't up to it. I'm sure Teri feels the same.
       Teri makes salads, macaroni and regular. The menu is hots dogs, hamburgers, ribs, baked beans and deviled eggs by my mom, and lots of other stuff I don't eat.
       I was going to let Sally Ann work the BBQ grill like she did last year, but she has gone to get a table and Teri wants to start, so I pour a large glass of Vodka and lemonade, a dangerous drink because you don't taste the vodka and I throw a package of hot dogs on a medium flame and go get some of the thirty-six hamburgers I made last night. Over a medium flame things cook slowly. Teri brings out a aluminum pan to put the burger and hot dogs on, but I serve directly from the grill to serve the food hot. I keep working the grill and drinking the vodka and lemonade. I don't feel drunk, but every so often the earth stops spinning or maybe it would speed up and I'd lose my balance. Once the stairs going to the back door tilted and I almost slipped off them. Other wise I wasn't feeling the alcohol.

       This was also the day the first ever baseball game is played in London England and I wanted to see some of them. I heard the Yankees score six runs in the top of the first while driving getting stuff. I figured the games is over until the Red Sox scored six in the bottom of the first. Final score was something like 17-13 Yankees.
       The Pool got its first real workout of the year. The water was clear and only moderately cool, perfect for swimming. There were at least a dozen kids in the pool at a time. Even the trampoline got used. As I was walking over to tell them no flips someone with long hair does a beautiful flip landing reasonable well. That was the first and last one.
        The evening came and people drifted away. The party got down to a small group. I bought out a photo album I had from the eighties and Madeline and Karl and a few others got a laugh from it. Ruth would too.
       Clean up started and it was not too bad. All the stress (Teri did relax, no diamonds) was well worth it. Everyone had fun and it could not have gone better. I hope everyone even Elena had fun. I asked Elena the next day about the party to get her take on it, what she did, was it fun. It was like pulling teeth. I got a it was fun, even tho I didn't want a party. I swam in the pool, that was about it. God I love her. I hope deep down inside she knows just how much. Don't worry Nastia you are loved just as much. Good luck with David, make the right decisions.






















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Elena is a High School graduate

What started in the fall of 2009 has ended. Elena, our youngest daughter is officially a graduate of Clarkstown North, class of 2019.
   

   Elena followed what has become her usual pattern for school. Except this year she started out the year making us think she had been replaced with an exact duplicate who was interested in school and wanted to do well. For the first semester or two she was pulling a high B average. We kept asking who are you? Did someone switch you while we were sleeping? (I'd make a joke about pods and the horror movie Invasion of the body snatchers, but I don't think there is anyone alive who remembers that 1956 classic about the fear of communism) She was amazing. Sometime around January or maybe a little earlier because her second semester grades did fall a little it changed. At the time we did care, they were still amazing. I felt if she continued to do well like this maybe she would get accepted to a college that was better than RCC.
       The third semester our daughter returned and her grades fell into the toilet. It was so bad that the high 80's, low 90's average in English she had was not going to off set the bad third quarter and for a while lousy fourth quarter grades and she might not graduate with her class. So she again finally turned it on and it all ended well and good.
     

 Yesterday's (Tuesday,June 25,2019) plan was to leave at four-thirty and get to RCC before 5:15. I left work at three-thirty, Teri worked from home. I picked up my mother and was safely at home so we could all leave on time. Teri is, has become more so a person who can't, won't be late. It has gotten to the point that, well lets just tell the story. I'm taking pictures around four-thirty. Teri says we have to leave. I want her to be in a picture and she says we don't have time and so no picture of her at home with Elena. We get into the car on a bright sunshiny day that is a little too warm. It will be the first day the mercury will touch ninety. Last week we were having nights in the fifties. Teri starts to move and asks me if I know the back roads to RCC. I'm still a little pissed about the picture incident so I give an off handed yes. Nastia, proud she know the route offers to navigate and says go as if you are going to Davids.
   

 We take Lake road into New City, make a left onto Main Street and then a right onto Eckerson Road. Traffic is heavy and slow. We are crawling up Eckerson and time is moving faster than we are. Teri says something like she feels like she will vomit. Just a little east of West Clarkstown road Teri is about to have a coronary. She asks if I know another way. Having traveled these backroads for many years, but not having been on them for many years I give a guarded yes. I tell her to make the right onto West Clarkstown road. Teri starts right away where do I turn? I'm working on remembering the road, picking up landmarks and memories, trying to remember the route. God was with me and us. The route was simple and I remembered it. And the kicker was the traffic was light and we make it to RCC at what we think is five minutes late. We pull into the parking lot of the Fieldhouse. Kids in purple caps and gowns are still running around. It's a purple sea of soon to be graduates. Girls in big clunky heels are clopping around like Budweiser Clydesdales. Several year down the road they will all laugh at the shoes and wonder why they wore them.
 
   The Fieldhouse is crowded and warm, going to hot. Last year we got good seats and most all of my pictures were lost when I transferred them to my computer. This year I have hopes for better. It turns out we were not late, but we were also not early. All of the good seats have been taken and the ceremony was not scheduled to start until around six-thirty. We sit in an increasingly warm fieldhouse. I start to get sleepy. I put my head down and Teri asks if everything is ok. I answer yes. A few minutes later she asks if I am falling asleep. I answer that I am not able to because she keeps asking me questions or something like that. For all you kids in the audience, you never give your wife or significant other a wise ass answer when you are doing something that they feel is not appropriate for the surroundings. Yes, I pissed her off, again.
     
 Finally the proceeding begin. They start to call all the student, row by row to stand and walk forward and go behind the stands so they can make a grad entrance. It had finally begin. After a few moments some music started and from the other direction the class of 2019 starts to file in. Leading the group are the principle, advisors and students how graduated with special honors. After that the rest of the class in a mish mash order. I think it was the schools attempt to get away from alphabetical order.
     

When the class was standing in front of their seats everyone is asked to stand and say the pledge. Over the last few years the pledge has meant different things to me. After 9/11 I was intensely proud. When my daughters became citizens, I felt they had just become a member of one of the best places on earth to live. Now the pledge has become something that ultra conservatives have wrapped themselves in in defence from the far left liberals brand of new socialism. Leaving me in the center all alone. It's very empty here. Would someone want to join me please. It has worked for so long. Sorry for that pity party. I keep my mouth shut so much about it all that occasionally it leaks out.
     
 After the pledge, everyone sits. I was glad to stand for a moment. The Principle starts his speech.
I was pleased that he had a new one. Last years was OK, but I was pleased he took the time to write a new one. This years one was OK to and I was pleased that it didn't drag on for a long period of time like this blog.
       Next was the salutatorian and after that was the valedictorian. I looked it up and if you think about it it is obvious what they are. They are the first and second racking students in the class. After last year and this year I expect to never have to figure out how to spell these two words. For salutatorian, which I was saying wrong Google kept giving me Salvatorian fathers. While these two speeches were going on I was on my phone. I realized a the start of the first speech, I didn't have to listen. And I found the speeches annoying for some reason. I guess I have been jaded by sixty-one years of grads proclaiming the future is ours and seeing where I have ended up. It's not awful, it's just not what I expected. They began calling names a little while later
       I move from my seat and move forward and stand between two grandstands. Elena's row is next.  Nastia joins me a little before Elena's row gets up. I snap a few pictures more hoping to get the picture. Her group stands and I snap a few more. They move toward me and go down the outside isle to the front and stop waiting for their name to be called. Finally Her name is called. And as always they pronounce it wrong.  Ella na' Mule er' she gets it double. They can't pronounce either of her names. At least with me they got Joseph right. She accepts her diploma (really just the holder for it) she walks towards the center isle, stops for a picture and proceeds back to her seat. Her friend Jessica is in the last row and after she receives her diploma holder, she gets a high five from Nastia and she returns a big smile. A few moments later it is all over hats are thrown into the air a little half heartedly in celebration.

Some of the people who helped her

       I gather both girls and we start out. Teri, Nancy and my mom want to sneak behind the grandstand. I see the girls one moment talk to Teri and look again and they are gone. So I join Teri and we move behind the grandstands and wait near the door. After a little while I go looking for them and finally find them talking to some form teachers and administrators. As much trouble as she was in school everyone seems to love her and wants to be there for her. She has soo many people in her corner.
      She is given some gifts, a cat picture she hangs up in her room. There is some laughing, lots of happiness and finally it is time to leave. At the car Elena and Nastia have to go see someone and we are not ready to leave.
       When we finally leave we go to the Airmont Diner and have a very tasty dinner. Elena has a crazy shake she says was really good.

ENOUGH PICTURES!

        The night does not end there. Elena has the senior night event thingie. It's something new in the last so many years where the class go to a place and are supervised. They go from about 11 at night to about 4:30 in the morning. This year it was at West Rock in Nanuet. She played tennis, hung out with friend and had a real good time. About 4:45 in the morning we get a call, she is at the school. I get up and go get her. For someone who has been awake all night she is surprisingly awake. She talks on the way home about what she did. At home Teri calls her into the bedroom to hear her tell the story. Sometime around 5:30 everything quiets down and just as I fall asleep Teri's alarm goes off at 6.

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Friday morning, first day of summer

It is Friday morning, the first day of Summer. It is raining again. It has rained every day this week.It is cool, maybe in the low 70's. Spring has been wet and cold. Hopefully summer will not be. As I've gotten older it seems I'm cold all the time. Maybe it has to to with the fact I work in an office and a business that makes food and packs it in a room I go into often that is kept at about 65 degrees.
       Teri left for work after two days home sick. I think she hates this job more than she has ever hated a job in her life. She talks about looking for another one. I wish she would find something else. The problem is I work at a job where I don't get paid much. I've been there since October of 2014 and I really feel that I am doing some good in the world while I am doing my job. I have built something here that I am proud of. I always have a positive attitude and a pleasant tone in my voice when I answer the phone. I encourage all customers to call me if there is a problem or a question even if they want to compliment the chef. Most of my customers are elderly and sometimes I get a call because I think they just want to talk to someone.
       The Girls are both upstair asleep. It's 8:37 and both are done with school. Elena finished High School and she graduates next week. She has a party planned for Saturday the twenty-ninth starting at two in the afternoon. Hopefully the weather will cooperate.
       Nastia about a month ago finished her first year in college. She worked hard and did well. I think she said she has about a 3.0 which is fantastic.
       Both Girls are working tonight, so I guess it is Teri and I for dinner.
       When I talked about Elena and her accident I found myself repeating every time I tell the story that she has her own car, she paid to get it fixed, she pays for her own insurance and gas. She, like her sister takes care of it all. Nothing come out of Teri's or my pocket. They have done it all. I couldn't be prouder. Now if we talk about their friends the dark clouds of disappointment and a little contempt appear. Of all their friends on Ariana has a job and a car. Ariana is the only one with either. I don't know what these parents are raising. Teri and I are raising independent self reliant, hopefully women of the twenty-first century who will hopefully go on and lead lives that they will be proud of and be happy in and not have to have a partner at their side to be happy and or taken care of.

A Right of Passage, maybe

It's every parents nightmare, your child getting into an accident. There young, inexperienced and think they are invulnerable. Having lived it as a child and twenty-something I didn't appreciate it fully until now.
       It was raining yesterday. Sometimes the rain came down hard and other times there was nothing. I was in work in Elmsford. It was after two and I hadn't gotten lunch yet. There had been talk about the boss buying lunch, but it had evaporated and now it was late and I didn't know what to have for lunch. I end up going to Frank's Deli in White Plains. It's a little expensive, but the food is good. I get back to the office, sit down at my desk, turn on my phone and start to eat my chicken cutlet on a club roll with mayo and lettuce. At about the halfway point of the sandwich my phone rings, it's Elena. Now she rarely calls and usually if I'm at work I won't pick up. This time a do, but with a little trepidation. I say hello and Elena says hello like nothing has happened. She then goes on to explain that she was in a car accident in New City. I ask her if she is all right. The tone of her voice says everything is, but with her sometimes you need to ask. She says she is fine. I ask her where she is as I begin to close my computer and clear my desk. I don't think she needs my help, but I want to be there. She explains several times but she also has a habit of mumbling sometimes and all I get from her after several attempts is she is in New City, she is near Red Mango and the turn off to go into New City. I tell Ted my daughter has had a small accident and I go, it's quarter after three. Teri calls me as I head down the road. I tell her I  am on my way, but it will be twenty minutes to half an hour before I get there, traffic willing. Down route 9A to the Thruway entrance and onto 287 traffic is not bad. It gets heavy at the merge with 87, but it is not as bad as it would have been an hour later. I'm across the bridge quickly and  I hit the usual traffic in Nyack where the Thruway goes from four to three lanes. I get off in South Nyack swing around on the new exit ramp onto Route 9W and decide my best route at this point is to head as if I am going home and take Congers road straight into New City to Route 304, which is what I do. And always as if on cue  someone pulls out in front of me doing ten miles an hour less than me. I ride their bumper which causes them to drive even slower until they finally turn off the road only to have someone else pull in front of me as I pull past the other Sunday driver.
    Thirty-eight minutes after leaving Elmsford I am on Route 304 heading south. I was calm and relaxed when I left Elmsford. The closer I get to the accident the more uptight I get and the more I need to get there. Elena is still unhurt, but I need to see. I pass the turn to Main Street New City and look up the hill toward Bardonia and I see Police car lights, that must be her. I pull into the parking lot to I think The Smile Place, a dentist's office and park.
     I get my first real close look at Elena's car. I had hoped to change her flat tire with the spare and drive it to get fixed. She has two front flats, not gonna happen.
     I ask her what happened. She says she was going north on Route 304 in the right lane. The Driver of the other car, a young girl with just a permit and no licensed driver in the car is in the left lane possibly tailgating the car in front of her because when it slows down too quickly she is forced to hit her brakes and change lanes to where Elena is driving. She hits Elena's car in the front driver's side fender flatting the front tire. Elena tries to swerve to the right and hits the curb and flattens her other tire. I introduce myself to the police officers and call Chris Kelly to tow her car. About ten minutes later a flat bed arrives from a place I'd never heard of. I ask if Chris sent him, he know no Chris. I tell the police that I don't want this guy to tow the car, I'm waiting for Chris. The officer's friendly attitude disappears. I wait for Chris and of course it starts to rain. I get a picture of the insurance card from the other driver's father. He seems like I nice guy and I feel a little bad until I get to Allstate Insurance a little later.
    The Agent takes all the facts down. I ask him what will happen. The short version is Elena's car could be considered totaled if the repairs exceed the value of the car. And if that is so and Allstate pays for it to be totaled, then it can't be insured by Allstate if I pay to get it repaired. So Chris Kelly has a guy who can give an estimate to bang out the fender, replace the two tires and rims and the broken directional. I feel as if we are going to get the short dirty end of the stick again even though it was not Elena's fault. Such is life I guess.
    I'll write about this more in the future.


















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Last Day of High School ever and an award that night

It's June 18th 2019 the day after Elena's last day of classes.It's raining outside, Teri has gone to work early because she has a Tuesday conference call with China at 8AM. Teri is one of a group on the call. She is not happy in her job.
       Elena and Nastia are upstairs sleeping. It's 7:50 in the morning, the rain gives off a hissing sound out the windows on the north side of the house as it hits the grass and leaves of the trees. It quiet in the house.
       Last night Elena was given an award. She was recommended by Ms. Chamberlain, a really wonderful teacher and person. I wish I'd had  teachers like Elena has had when I was in school. I feel they have saved her from herself and possibly put her on the right track. The award was the Joe DiPasquale Scholarship.
It came with $250.00 to put toward college cost. It was very nice of Ms. Chamberlain to do that.  She has looked after both of the girls and I hope she knows how wonderful a person she is. Of course Elena didn't want to go or to dress nice for the award ceremony. It was a very relaxed informal ceremony. They had cookies and water for anyone who wanted some before and after the ceremony. In the beginning the Principle introduced people who were involved in the scholarships that were being awarded. Most came up and told a sad story about someone who'd died young or tragically and they were doing this in their memory. After a while the principle took over and started to hand out awards without any background or history about the awards. I would like to know something about the Joe DiPasquale award and what happened to start it. One award brought memories from the past. The Arthur Orlando award. I had him as a teacher about forty years ago in high school. He was a good teacher.
       The evening ended with the  principle almost begging the attendees to take some cookies as we left. I did. It was all over in about an hour and I enjoyed spending time with Elena. I get so much joy from just hanging around with the two of them, I hope they know that.
I told her I was going to use the second picture with a caption reading When Elena finds out she is an awards winner. Maybe I shouldn't. Naaaaa......

Prom Weekend and another glimpse of the future

It was Prom weekend for Elena. She and a couple of other friends had decide not to go to it, so instead they had a sleep over at Jessica's house. Nastia is a friend of Jessica's so she went to. Both Girls had to work on Friday, Nastia noon to six and Elena four to eight, so they both got there separately and late.
       I get very few details of what happened there from Elena, Nastia had to be at work this morning at eight, so I won't get to see her until later. The few details Elena gives me are, they had pizza, pineapple pizza and bacon chicken ranch. She said she would have preferred peperone.  They then watched the movie 'IT'. Now I'm hoping time will be kind to this movie, unlike what time has done to the 'Exorcist'. When the Exorcist first came out I was glad I watched it in the middle of the day and it was still light out. When the girls hear how scared I was they laugh and call me names. 'IT' is one of those movies you might not want to watch before you go to bed. She said they had fun.
       Teri and I were left on our own for Friday night. I left work about five on a Friday night. I was prepared for a long slow drive home. I was in the mood for a little Elton John, so I went on my phone, like the kids do and brought up on youtube an album of his music. I turned it up a little too loud, I cracked my windows, opened the sun roof and on a cool late Friday afternoon I proceeded to take sixty minutes to do a fifteen or twenty minute ride home. I got home a little after six. Teri calls and asks what's for dinner. She is still at work, at a job that seems to be killing her spirit. I haven't thought about dinner, so when she gets home a little while later she says, "Lets trey three guys" I'm thinking is this a new place or did two guys quit? Wh head up to five guys and are ready to eat when she notices they have put the calorie count up on the menu. I hadn't noticed, yeah I know typical guy move. I'm sorry, you just have to love me the way I am and quit pointing out my faults. (more on that later) Ter decides to not eat. I've ordered and a quick count of the calories tells me I will be consuming over 1600 calories. If I had added a milkshake, it would have been 2200. God I hate calories, they taste soo good! She relents, gets a burger and shares some of my fries. The bag of fries were in the neighborhood of something like 600 calories, I don't think she took enough to bring that count down much.
       After dinner, we leave and on the way home we do something we rarely do, no it wasn't have sex, we talked. It was going well until I told her, very innocently, without two thoughts about it because she had approved the project to my surprise (she'll never admit she did) that starting in the next several weeks, hopefully after Elena's graduation party, I will start to remove the cedar shakes on the house. Teri gets agitated (can't think of a word that describes it better, but men will know what I'm talking about), maybe animated might work. Well whatever you want to call it she proceeds to list, in a very excited way (nah, I can do better than that) all my projects that are in a state of suspension (my words, euphemisms, you'll love them or hate them.) and she will not stand for another project that will not get finished. I tell her that is why Karl is helping me and I don't tell her she originally agreed to the project. She continues on listing things that I have not finished or may she is talking about the weather, I've quit listening and talking. She notices and says, "Now Your angry?" I thought my silence had made that real clear. If I wanted a list of my failures, I'd talk to my wife, oh wait I was and she is.
       The rest of the car ride home we listen to the sound of the tires against the road. When we get home. I tell her this was a fun night, we should do it again. No, I was really just trying to get past the fight. She now is not talking to me. I go to the living room, Teri watches a little TV in the kitchen before she goes upstairs. About midnight I go up kiss her good night and think in the morning it will be over. I remember the saying 'never go to bed angry.' I wasn't angry, so I felt I could go to bed now.
       THE NEXT MORNING I'm laying in bed and I feel her get up I say "good morning" , she mumbles something, I guess she went to bed angry. Now I know why you shouldn't.
       We let the dogs out and I tell her I'm sorry about last night and I agree with what she said and, yes the truth does hurt. She still proceeds to go through my list of unfinished projects. Everytime she takes a breath, I tell her I agree with everything she has said and there is no need to go on. But she has taken a deep breath and doesn't want to waste it, so she has to go on and does. When She is finally winded, I say, almost pleadingly, "I agree with everything you have said." Well she is satisfied, she has gotten it off her chest and the world is back to what passes for normal. God help us all.






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The End of High School

You hate it, you love it,it still comes to an  end. Today is Friday June 14, 2019 and it is the second to last day of High school for Elena. I got her up this morning like I have for the past four years. Nastia having finished her first year at RCC sleeps in. The four years at North, for me have gone by in the blink of an eye. I remember nearer the beginning of High School wondering how I would manage to get through all these years of getting up at six in the morning. The Girls had is worse, after getting up at six, they had to go to school. I still would have traded with them to go back to High School even though I hated it like Elena does. It's a simpler time. After this life will sneak up on you and start to get more complicated. They'll go to College, get full time jobs, life will be great. Then they'll want things, a better car, to live on their own, to live with someone they love. They'll be making good money, so they'll get the car, a pet or two, an apartment, then maybe a house and suddenly life is not so simple, even if you can afford all your wants.
       This last week or so after getting Elena up and getting the dogs outside with Teri, I've gone back to bed. On this second to last day of her high school career she comes into the bedroom to give me a kiss goodbye. I hug her, kiss her and tell her that she is going to miss high school after it is over. I get this look for her that says, no, I don't think so, as she walk away. I should of explained that it will be more the simpler times she'll miss. The day I graduated high school, I didn't appreciate the thought that I'd never be a student there ever again. Up to the point of graduation, all of your life is consumed with school. When does it start, when are the holidays and when does it end. After it's over, it's a new ballgame.
      One of the memories I have and will keep for the rest of my life is getting up at six AM in the winter. The alarm going off too soon, the heat clicking on and the warm air flowing out of the vents. Getting out of the nice warm bed a little too soon before the heat has fully warmed the house. Going past the night light in the bathroom, making the left and going down the hallway to where the girl are both sleeping. Into the room in the half light, Elena in her sleeping bag, Nastia huddled under some soft blankets. Neither one under the sheets and blankets on the bed. Wanting to go back to bed as I gently touch their arm or brush hair from their faces. Thinking about it, maybe I guess I could do another year or so of this, it was not so bad and maybe, I guess I'll miss it too.